November 15, 2006

If I did it, here's how it happened Look who can't stop himself bragging.
posted by Skrik 17 years ago
  • I hereby resolve to NEVER watch FOX network programming again. OJ is one of those guys that, when you read that someone "took him out" on the street, you would just say "'bout time", and the world would smell a bit fresher.
  • OK -- I know I don't have to tell you guys this, but I'm going to anyway. Don't buy his book, mmkay? Thx. Just get the gist of it off wikipedia if you really need to know. *has sudden fear created of 'If I Really Did It' book from Jacko*
  • Ummm, yeah, ok... let's squeeze some more blood out of those fine leather gloves while we're at it. Could he be any more obvious? I seriously thought this was a joke when I saw this earlier this morning.
  • *drops anvil on Nordberg*
  • Let's not blame OJ for this book. The blame properly falls on Judith Regan, the whoring pimping publisher of OJ's book. Judith Regan is also the whore that famously fucked herself silly with Bernard Kerik in an rented apartment that was to be used for 9/11 rescue workers. So let's make sure we all understand that it is Judith Regan whose publishing house is owned by FOX and the NewsCorp that is responsible for printing this pus.
  • Ay yi yi!! No es bueno!!
  • oh my, I hovered on the link and the url made me think it was going to be about, you know, THE SIMPSONS...then I read the comments. not sure I can bring myself to read the article tho...
  • What a complete sociopath.
  • Makes my wanting to hire a hit man and clean things up sound like social reform, no dunnit?
  • Um, yeah. Now that I know the legal story, mine is really different. Isn't that funny? Freakin liar. I wish he'd get hit by a bus full of...anything. How about gasoline? Tthat way the flames could be seen from the moon.
  • Or a bus full of napalm. I think there's one due in about 20 minutes.
  • This is surreal! I'm simply stunned. I can't get over it.
  • Why so shocked? O.J. needs the money to continue to fund his hunt for the real killer. Hey legal monkeys: Does he open himself up for future legal action with this?
  • No.
  • Double jeopardy.
  • Sorry, What is double jeopardy. whew!
  • Well, nobody wants to hear how he didn't do it. This is the only book they'll buy.
  • According to Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Double_Jeopardy
  • If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.
  • Simpson has failed to pay the $33.5 million judgment against him in the civil suit. His NFL pension and his Florida home cannot legally be seized. They've edited the article a bit - it seems, if I dare, even more revolting now. And what the fuck is up with that! Why his NFL pension cannot be legally siezed?? Does the football convey special privelages? Fuck me, I was behind on a credit card payment many years back, and they hijacked my salary from work. Ya'r found liable for another person's death in a civil suit, and they can't touch ya?? BLEEECH!
  • so wait wait, if i get acquitted, then turn around and say "ha! i totally did it but i got off!" then i can't be tried again on the grounds of double jeopardy? sigh, maybe they can try him for breaking and entering or something.
  • I imagine there's some sort of perjury charge if you admit straight up that you lied in court.
  • He didn't lie in court. He never testified. He can't be tried again because of double jeopardy. He has already been sued successfully. I am not sure what the content of this book is going to be. It is not legal to make money off of committing a crime (convicted murderers, etc. who write tell-alls while in prison cannot keep any of the proceeds of their books/movies, etc.). Therefore, Simpson needs to say "If I did it, then this is what I would have done." That seems to be what he is doing. I would be interested to know if he is actually going to be recounting how he committed the crimes, or if he is just going to give some fantasy version and then use the version he created to show how he could not have done it. I am not going to buy the book, but I would be interested to know what is in it.
  • For someone who's supposed to be innocent, he sure has a way of making himself look guilty... Anyway, legal question: with this double jeopardy thing, what would happen if some new evidence were found? I understand the use of double jeopardy in making sure the justice system is unable to deal multiple sentences for one crime, but what if a case fell apart and new evidence is found later on? (Say, based on hints from a supposedly fictional account by a suspect?)
  • "Clever lawyering can get you a long way," said Laurie Levenson, a Loyola University law school professor and former federal prosecutor who has followed the case closely. t00 sick.
  • New evidence would not make a difference. The new evidence would have to be for a different crime. If, for example, they somehow found the remains of a third person, then Simpson could be tried for that case. But they cannot try Simpson for the murder or any lesser included offenses of Ron Goldman or Nicole Simpson.
  • My learned, sticky friend is correct. The courts have already tried the criminal matters, arrived at a verdict, and the appeals processes have expired. Simple res judicata. However, depending on limitation periods, he may still find himself on the hook for a different civil matter, which has not already been decided. The civil trial was (as I recall, and can't be bothered to look up not) done by the victim's families -- so, say the kids wanted to start their own civil action. That wouldn't have been litigated, and would not be bound by res judicata. But, again, limitation periods probably preclude such actions from happening now anyway.
  • I have little doubt that OJ did it, but I also think that the police and prosecutors fucked up so hugely and so often that the acquital was the only proper choice for the jury. As an example, I remember something about the lead detective acquiring key evidence (blood?) at the scene, and instead of taking it straight to the lab, he took it home for the night, and dropped it off at the lab in the morning.
  • 'Judith Regan says she published O.J. Simpson's book "If I Did It" because she was a victim of domestic violence' Amazing, how we can justify our character weaknesses.
  • sooo like, she is a victim so she is afraid of abusive thugs like OJ and couldn't turn him down????????????? tungsten!
  • I guess we'll see it on Youtube, then.
  • Poor OJ. This news must cut deep.
  • Oh snap!
  • The Dana Carvey Show was ahead of its time.
  • Judith Regan fired becuase she's a raving anti-Semite. More proof that use of the phrase "Jewish cabal" has never turned out well for anyone.
  • I'd snark about making that comment but I just can't get past the idea of what a massive neurological sequence of misfirings - and subsequent meetings - it was to have OJ Simpson write a book about how he "would have" killed the people he killed. That's like 500 New Cokes end-to-end with a fart flavored popsicle on top.
  • Publisher says that we all misunderstood -- the book was actually written by a ghost writer. "Barclay Road CEO says Simpson didn't write 'book of fiction'" Absolutely -- not one bit of fiction whatsoever.
  • *pulls rubber mask off* Look, the Ghost Writer was really O.J.! And he'd have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for us meddling kids!
  • /collapse
  • That giant sucking sound? That's the sound of Herbert Becker sweeping in to fill the void in the sleazosphere caused by Judith Regan's departure.
  • This incident will tarnish his image.
  • "We don't believe he's going anywhere," he said. Indeed.
  • O.J. a suspect in a casino heist. I'm sure I saw that movie. You know the one I mean...he was in it with that other guy...the one who did that TV show with that blond actress. She was always saying stuff...you know what one I mean?
  • That guy who always wore a shirt?
  • Nice beaver!
  • Ed Sullivan?
  • No, no...the guy who drove that car...he used to be in another show with a kid.
  • No, you're thinking of BJ and The Bear
  • Uncle Bobby?
  • Wait, wasn't he in that episode of Bernockle: Fast Food Lawyer where Bernockle's old law school professor was representing the guy who got burned on a fried candy bar at the State Fair?
  • "We don't believe he's going anywhere," he said. Or at least, not so fast we can't catch him.
  • TUM: No, that was the episode of Bernockle: Baby, Fry My Candy Bar where Bernockle dipped his shrimp in light sweet crude and found 17 new uses for his fuzzy yellow balls while chanting, "My monkey loves your pigeon!" I'm sure you remember THAT episode.
  • TUM, sometimes I heart you so much it hurts me.
  • Just awesome
  • "If I Did It: The Movie Allright, so it's not OJ...
  • Interesting, the juxtaposition of what the parents are up to vs. this: "Gone Baby Gone, based on a 1998 Dennis Lehane novel, was supposed to launch last Dec. 28 in the U.K., but the president of Miramax Films said it would be insensitive to release the film while Madeleine was still missing." You're a sad excuse for a human being when the money machine is behaving with more moral sensitivity than you are.
  • Well, that, and that some parents' missing kids are delay-worthy, and others aren't.
  • That little girl has such a beautiful face. Damn those assholes--leaving small children alone in a room while they go stuff their faces.