October 03, 2006

• When I had to deal with a neighbour's cat coming into my apartment and shitting on my kitchen floor, I'd carefully scooped up the shit and promptly returned it to the neighbour for them to dispose of. Worked like a charm. But I also could have been beaten up. So I have no idea.
• Why is following them home a problem? It is a public area, you have a right to walk the sidewalk just like they do. Don't let jerks like this intimidate you. If they ask why you're following them, just state that the dogs are a problem, you intend to report it, and you need their address to do so. The other option is to call the police when the dogs arrive. I had a neighbor who would let his dog run loose (and I didn't trust the dog). Every time it entered my yard I would call the police or animal control. Eventually they issued a citation. I had a similar problem once. I put a big sign in my yard asking the owner of the dog to please clean up the "dog s***" that was being left by his animal. I used names on the sign. They soon started taking a different route each day. and... "get off my lawn you damn kids!" /exits old and cranky mode
• I WISH I had some kind of solution. The folks at my complex walk their dogs on leashes, but they make no attempt to scoop the poop on the green areas, thus rendering them unusable for anything but walking more dogs.
• Make "Bad Dog Owner" flags for the poop piles. If necessary, edit the message until the desired effect is achieved. Give the dogs cookies and be nice to them.
• I walked past a house the other day that had chalked FOLLOW SCOOP LAW! (quite beautifully) on their sidewalk. I have no idea if it worked.
• Keep a bucket of chum on hand. Every time the dogs come into your yard, feed it to the dogs. The dogs will go home smelling like ass everyday. even if the owners hate you, the dogs will love you.
• Opportunity for a little pre-election advertising. NSFRWEL - Not safe for reading while eating lunch
• All your poopies are belong to us
• scoop up the poop and fling it at their front door. it is their poop, so give it back to them.
• A few minutes after the initial reasonable request, which was ignored, my SO found one of their dogs off the leash in the front yard, completely out of the owners' sight. She led it by the collar around back, where its owners were, at which point one of them flipped-the-fuck-out, screaming at my SO and threatening her. So following them home is going to be interesting at best, but I'm not intimidated. The reason I asked for other ideas is because I thought of that one already. I wonder what the police will do if, upon following them home, the female owner accuses me of stalking her.
• If these people threatened your SO, I would call the police NOW! I take back the "following them" suggestion (and all the rest of my ideas above), they are evidently a bit crazy, don't screw with them. Use law enforcement to handle this, that's what you pay taxes for.
• Idiots do not respond well to diplomacy, they don't have the intellectual or social skills to understand how that works (just look at our infamous chimp of a president who wouldn't know a diplomatic act if it bit him in the butt).. Throw that out the window...
• I'd advise not following the female owner for the very reasons you have in mind. If they're being that unreasonable, then yeah, you may have no recourse but the police. Are you owning or renting? Is there some neighborhood group you can appeal to without going to the cops?
• Call animal control. Unleashed dogs, even those with ID tags, that are wandering around by themselves get picked up in my town.
• A good friend of mine recently had her hand bit through and her dog lost about 10 cm of scalp (amongst other bit and pieces) when her dog was attacked by a loose Rottweiler. Her quote: "Thank god I'm not eight years old. I wouldn't have stood a chance." Cops. Repeat as necessary.
• Do the dogs wear tags with the owner's name & phone number? Or maybe a rabies vaccination tag with a vet's name? Could you track down the owners that way?
• When the neighbor isn't looking, cover the dogs' mouths in blood. When they head home, let out a few blood curdling screams followed by a few "MY BABY!"
• I was going to suggest something along the lines of this. Until you posted about their verbal assault and threats on your signother while she was removing trespassers from your property it seemed like a good idea (although I have no idea how well it works). Now I think it's a matter for the police to handle and record (the record is the most important part, I'd think). Here's an interesting article on dog trespass in English law.
• I wouldn't do anything to escalate the situation with them personally because they seem mean. I think the route of looking at the dog tag and figuring out the owner that way, then calling animal control or the cops, is the best method if the dog has tags on. If the dogs do not have tags on and they're running around, technically they are strays, and you should call animal control to come get them. I argue this on the grounds that it's just not safe to let a dog run around unsupervised (for the dogs or for people if they're mean dogs), so maybe a trip to animal control is the best for all concerned.
• Yeah, animal control and the police. Report every pile of poop/extended barking to animal control and every wandering dog/threatening owner to the police. If you complain enough, something will be done.
• Your neighbourly duty was discharged when your SO took the dog back and was yelled at. Go to the cops.
• If Woody smallish bear would have went to the police....
• Worth looking into as an option for a property-owner? Fencing your property. This may or may not be an option, since you've described a situation where public access and possible right-of-way issues may be involved. Possible in some localities to loose the right to fence land if an established right-of-way is blocked.
• Yeah, forget what I said. Once they started threatening, that's it. Cops cops cops. It's the one thing these anti-social fucks understand. Don't call the cops about the dogs, but about the threats. They're the ones who escalated this situation, so there's no need to feel bad about bringing in the big guns. My only qualification on this is if you think that you'll wake up to find a brick through your windshield. If they're fucked-up anti-social fucks, maybe best to play it on the down-low, and get some -- uh -- whatever the equivalent of mothballs-for-cats would be.
• Video the dogs. Video the owners. Take to cops.
• Since it is a townhouse, is there a homeowner's association? Send the videos to the homeowner's association too.
• MonkeyFilter: It's the one thing these anti-social fucks understand.
• My only qualification on this is if you think that you'll wake up to find a brick through your windshield. If they're fucked-up anti-social fucks, maybe best to play it on the down-low, and get some -- uh -- whatever the equivalent of mothballs-for-cats would be. The terrorists have already won.
• Some dog repellent, either the chemical or electronic kind? Maybe that anti-teen infrasound thingie would work.
• Bear traps. I'm tellin' ya. Bear traps.
• My only qualification on this is if you think that you'll wake up to find a brick through your windshield. If they're fucked-up anti-social fucks, maybe best to play it on the down-low, and get some -- uh -- whatever the equivalent of mothballs-for-cats would be. Amen to that. This could turn into a nasty and possibly dangerous conflict. Passive defense is preferable to offense. How about putting up a fence?
• Antifreeze in a bowl in the back yard. No, not really. Don't do that. I also think the police are the answer here.
• If all else fails, stage a nuclear test over the neighbourhood. Should work.
• i've had good luck steering cats away from certain places using lemon juice and rind. i think this works with dogs as well, but i'm not certain. the "get off my lawn" stuff insolentchimp links to works well, according to my lawn-proud sister.
• Maybe you could get a really big, ill-tempered cat to intimidate the dogs.
• Oh TUM, you foolish folly-following fool! What if they respond by getting a monsterous bird of prey to scare the giant cat? Oh, you'll say, "we'll get a huge spider to disturb the bird, the bird they brought to attack the cat, the giant mog that troubled the dog - the dog whose shit scares smallish bear". You know this will only end when someone swallows their pride. Well, I don't know why YOU don't swallow your pride. I hope you DIE.
• Well, you can't blame a girl for trying to unload a really big, ill-tempered cat. *rubs bitten ankle*
• Maybe you could ask Mr. Tricycle to ban 'em. I'm going to ask for a heart.
• Not a brain, pete?
• And her little quidnunc, too! *cackle*
• Hey TUM, I'll take your cat! If it's big and mean enough, maybe it'll scare away the strays that keep crapping ON MY ROOF. And what's up with that, anyways? I thought normal cats like to dig around and bury their dirty little doings... not the mutant moggies in my neighborhood, apparently. I wonder if that "Get Off My Garden" stuff works on roofs? (rooves?)
• A cat! A cat! Hooray!!!! (wish I had more ideas about what to do about the dog thing)
• You might want to use some Bitter Apple repellent on anything bordering your yard. but that could get expensive. Alternatively, you could buy a roll of plastic bags and set up a garbage can. Make it easier for these creeps to pick the shit up. Positive reinforcement and all that. But I second the notion of involving your housing cooperative in this, as the owners are assholes.