August 28, 2006

• Myself I'm hanging out for the self-laundering and ironing types of clothing....
• And wait are the potential issues when we start wandering around with such items? Everyone will be afraid of death by electrocution every time there is a drizzle.
• Ooo good point. Plus will there be more of a chance of being struck by lightning?
• ...self-laundering... Reminds me of an old classic Alec Guinness movie: The Man in the White Suit.
• And wait are the potential issues when we start wandering around with such items? How to prevent such fabrics from being used in conjunction with spandex, or in unflattering sci-fi jumpsuits.
• Um so given i have no fashion sense will this fabric provide an excuse for being poorly dressed... as in - well i had to have my 'touch myself' keyboard with me tonight?
• Oh hell that came out all wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!
• hehehehehe
• Not sure I like the idea of fabric blaring. The world is altogether too noisy now, and anyway, who wants to listen to a sales pitch or a sermon emitted by a suit or a shirt worn to the movies or a restaurant? Because it will come to this, eventually.
• I concur bees. *imagines the day when huge AX logos flash across tshirts and jeans* Please no...
• Flashers, cover up so you can share those pornographic pictures on your underwear! I'm finding this whole subject more than somewhat depressing. Once clothing comes to this, what's the point of dressing?
• But imagine a world where you could adjust your t-shirt message at will..."Get outta my way" while walking along a busy sidewalk..."Nice rack" when approaching a busty blonde..."New Zealand" or "Canada" when in Europe, so you're not continually mistaken for an Aussie or American..."DEAD" when someone finally clocks you one for pissing them off, and it can't detect a heartbeat. Oh, and "WASH ME" when it realizes you haven't taken it off in a month.
• There are Australians who pretend they are New Zealanders? *doubts it*
• I could see a use for an MC riding that jacket that flashes "Back Off M***** F*****" when the brakes are applied.
• Thanky, I was hanging out for an hour or two this morning, but did notice it when leaving the coffee shop and it's all tucked back in now as it should. My bad!
• OK finally objects - spent 5 months in Canada being asked if i was english despite seriously back country Aussie drawl and now - Kiwis don't wanna be me????????????? Hey sorry bout slur fellow ANtipodeans but HEEEEEEEY!!!!!!
• Velcro pants are about as hi-tech as I'll ever need.
• Oh, and I want sofa cushions that light up when the person sitting on them farts.
• I'm holding out for the full cybernetics.
• The equivalment of a laptop, embedded within the fabric of my garments, would be useful. Add video googles, and voilá: imagine the power of google, googlemaps, GPS, IM and Skype while walking down the street. Of course, all that electric current and RF so close to the skin, that can't be good... About the inevitability of shirts with video playing on their surfaces, this came up in another board a long time ago, and I think the best suggestion about 'what would you have playing in your own T-shirt?' was that of an open chest surgery video loop, complete with beating heart. Hey, better than a thousand nike ads...
• trousers that twinkle I am soooo not going there.
• Hypercolor !
• I would like fabric that can display text and graphics. Leah Buechley has projects where she incorporates electronics into clothing and jewelery. I like her idea of making a shirt with dynamic cellular automata patterns, but using LEDs is way too flashy for me. I'd rather like to have a formal dress shirt whose entire surface is a high resolution eink display. I'd go for very subtle color changes and patterns using geometric and mathematical animations, myself. Well, that, and I'd like to have a cellphone woven into the collar fabric.
• God, I miss hypercolor. When I was a kid, that was, like, the kewlest thing EVAR. I particuarly liked opening a car door in early August and watching my shirt change color instantly. Not to mention getting touched by girls all day.
• Electrostatically charged clothing - activate a small battery, all the dirt and lint flies off. Blazers that incorporate small cell phones in the sleeves (controls) and lapels (ear and mouthpiece), or an iPod. Directional mikes and speakers ensure sound pollution is minimized. Clothes with rfids that are recognized by your home network - opens the garage door when you get within 100 yards, the front door when you get within 15 feet, activates the stereo, the coffee maker, flips on the Tivo and begins playing SportsCenter, whatever you want. Integrated kevlar sheathing. Clothing that monitors various physical and medical parameters and notifies local emergency services in the event of certain readings. Shoes that read ambient temperatures and have built-in heating and/or cooling meachanisms to maintain comfortable temps. Pockets that seal invisibly, and are opened via biometric locks. Glasses with wireless net that feeds news, weather, traffic, googlemaps on a superimposition, invisible to everyone but the wearer, info requests keyed in with a PDA. Reinforced cell phone pockets, that don't sag and automatically counterbalance to avoid that lopsided look. That's a start, anyway.
• Clothes whose weave becomes tighter/looser based on temperature and barometric pressure. GPS homer, monitored by your home network or via the web by whomever you give your codekey too - like a LoJack for people. Clothes that monitor basic stress reactions and then automatically engage in selected accupressure/accupuncture responses. Clothes that will signal to you a proximity alert, perhaps keyed to other's rfid clothes (e.g., my shirt collar emits a low noise when my child's rfid comes within [or gets beyond!] 20 feet)
• steel-toe tabi socks.
• Expressive socks, when they go astray, return with tales from far away, footloose hose of red and green, showing postcards of where they've been.
• Back to the Future 2 had some good self drying clothes and self-fitting trainers. Although I'm JG Ballard had a story about that... I'd go for the simple self cleaning, self-ironing stuff. Oh but I heard you can get a tie that has some elastic on it so you don't have to do it up every day!
• What about the Kitty Genovese dress fabric?
• Aha yes, that's a classic. I love that book. Rorshach is a fantastic character. I must get my theatre group to stage it and cast me. My philosophy-and-psychology-degree-having partner says that the Kitty Genovese story is an eye-rolling cliche in her circles! She'll be saying Nietzche is distorted by bar-room loudmouths next!
• Automatic erection-concealing pants.
• Man, I could have used those back in highschool.
• Listen, if you're wearing trousers that twinkle ain't nobody worried about your erection--automatic or not.