August 17, 2006

• Are they going to make me take off my clown makeup before they read my face?
• Of course, no one but a terrorist has ever appeared angry, tired, nervous, or responded suspiciously to questions from authority figures. But budgets must be justified, and technology can never go wrong. never go wrong. never go wrong.
• The next time I walk through an airport, I'm going to scrunch up my face and repeatedly flare my nostrils. I'd like them to attempt reading that expression. Hell, next we'll hear that mindreaders have been hired by the NSA to spot terrorists. Don't be shocked if you see NSA help-wanted ads for voodoo priests, either, which would put the term "headhunter" in a whole new light.
• Tie a rock to her feet and throw her in the water. If she floats, she's a terrorist. If she sinks and drowns, she can get on the plane.
• "They look for obvious things like someone wearing a heavy coat on a hot day..." Who was it who said that 'only criminals don't get nervous at checkpoints and customs?'
• Hell, if I knew I'd be greeted by 72 virgins at my destination, maybe I'd be downright chipper.
• Yeah, but think of it, Capt: 72 females you'd need to break in and train? Doesn't sound like a reward to me.
• You've got a while... what else are you gonna do? Stroll around magnificent gardens being one with God? Meh.
• "Now let's see, Mr... Sardonicus, is it? Is that Greek? Hmm. Aisle seat for you?"
• THe guy whose work they are basing it oni s Paul Ekman, a shameless self-promoter. His main work has been with something he calls microexpressions, expressions on the face that may involve little movement and take a fraction of a second. In his studies, he has people who have been trained to use his Facial Action Coding System (FACS) for years watch videos at 1/10 of normal or slower speed, and even then his reliability isn't that great. But then he goes out and jas his students give lecturers and instructional seminars to people where they are supposed to see these tiny facial movements, in real time, and make predictions based on it. All the while, his system doesn't have a facial expression for deception that works very well, much less one terrorist intent. Sure they say they are getting good results, but how often do they have false positives?
• I excel in recognizing the contempt of females.
• Flagpole: biometrics to spot terrorists.. interesting. I'll be willing to bet some training on one of these low-cost biofeedback devices using a copy of this graphing software may render that biometrics setup rather less useful than intended. Not positive it will of course, but willing to bet.
• They could hire a bunch of moms. They can spot no good in a heartbeat.
• Heard today that 8 of the 12 Duty Free shops at Toronto's Pearson Airport have closed due to lack of business due to the no liquids on planes thing. Make up your own comment.
• Well, it couldn't be any less reliable than x-ray scans on shoes.
• They won't be able to read my face if I'm wearing a burka. That'll fix 'em.
• They could hire a bunch of moms. They can spot no good in a heartbeat. That is true on so many different levels! :-)
• Confused? Sad? Constipated? Itchy? Regretful? Bored? Dehydrated?
• Heard today that 8 of the 12 Duty Free shops at Toronto's Pearson Airport have closed due to lack of business due to the no liquids on planes thing. Make up your own comment. It's just one more reason to show up 2 hours before your flight. Anyway, the duty-free shops are past the security checkpoints. Have they set up new checkpoints at the gate just for liquids? Seems to me they could take away the potentially explosive liquids at the usual checkpoint, then let you do whatever you want with the water/soda/booze you buy in the terminal. They would also need to check the shipments that the shops in there receive of course, but they should have been doing that anyway.
• Hey, reverse tag! Confused? Sad? Constipated? Itchy? Regretful? Bored? Dehydrated?: MonkeyFilter!