July 20, 2006

• neat-o
• Call me a Luddite, but I think I'll just stick with that handiest of inventions, the glass. *checks sundial, hops on pennyfarthing bike, heads down to creek with washboard*
• Where the hell was the fizz cup in '77 when I really needed it?? Still, nothing compares to the big 'ol frosty A&W mug...
• What? No YouTube link?
• Announcing the first ever reusable Ice Cream Float Cup! Won't they feel silly when they discover "the glass."
• Perhaps you are unaware of the staggering success enjoyed by the fizz cup at many southwestern state fairs. You may act coy now, but when your float-drinking has been completely dominated by this device, you'll think again about disparaging the fizz cup, glass users! *shllrrrrpp*
• it's just a spider.
• what?
• That's what the Aussies call an icecream float.
• As in "Waiter, there's a spider in my glass?"
• no
• In fact I have never understood this myself, I well remember my confusion as a kid, but I DON'T QUESTION IT
• Is it because so many spiders in Australia are dangerous, and the fat and sugar content in an ice cream float is also dangerous, if consumed frequently and in large quantities? That would make sense. To me.
• wikipedia says: In Australia, Coca-Cola resellers with access to soft-serve facilities (namely cinemas or small cafe styled stores) launched the "Coke Spider", a post mix Coke with vanilla soft-serve. Since then, many businesses and the general population refer to this drink as a "spider", with exception to McDonald's which marketed the same product in 2004 as the "Coke Float" (available in all Coke brand flavours.)
• That's too logical for a nation of lazy bastards. I used to think it's because the little threads of icecream run down into the drink, with the main 'body' on top, it looks to a moronic 1950s Aussie like a spider. I DON'T FUCKING KNOW. We also call puke 'chunder'. Flip flops are 'thongs'. THERE IS NO RHYME OR REASON
• Oh, look, see the internet choked while I was trying to post that & now some bloody foreigner bloody bloody bloody
• when the froth loses its initial effervescence, and the bubbles begin to burst, the top of the thing looks like a big jumble of spiders. /disgusting confection, if i remember correctly.
• "Where beer does flow and men chunder" Finally those stupid lyrics are starting to make sense.
• This thing is just an injection-molded vinyl cup with a sleeved hole in the center! OMFG. And I'm sure somebody's making a fortune off the bloody thing. Of course, any product that facilitates the consumption of calorie-dense, corn-syrup laden carbonated sugar water and ice cream, by all means, surely enriches all our lives and makes the world safer--for those who manufacture ice cream and soda. Onward and upward! Obesity and diabetes epidemics be damned! (Since now there's a definite link between these two and Alzheimer's, I imagine a future filled with fat folks on insulin enjoying their Fizz Cups, untroubled by brain cells.) *dispiritedly flings poo*
• Is it because so many spiders in Australia are dangerous, and the fat and sugar content in an ice cream float is also dangerous, if consumed frequently and in large quantities? That would make sense. To me. Or -- OR -- it's because floats are usually consumed by younger people with no regard to their future health, and James Dean died while driving his Porsche Spyder, also in this spirit of live-hard-die-young. But that doesn't account for the difference in spelling. Perhaps we can attribute that to Australians' natural illiteracy.
• No, that's the Yanks. Aussies are the drunks.
• Now I want a root beer float. Fucking job.
• *curls up with a good book and warm cup of chunder*
• *boots*
• One more plastic product that I won't waste any money on.
• Can it harness the awesome power of mentos and diet coke?
• Now, glamajamma, there's a product idea I can get behind.
• Ha ha! Your thinly-veiled wanton desire for this product is laughable! You've already ordered cases of these humanitarian-friendly gorge-aids, and now you must "play it cool" before the rest of your silly crowd! Ho ho! You don't fool me, mere slaves to the FizzCup(tm)!! Buy! Scoop! Screw! Squirt! Slurp! Your slavish indulgences are overwhelming! Ha ha!
• Monkeyfilter: Buy! Scoop! Screw! Squirt! Slurp!
• I would totally buy this if it were not a universally acknowledged truth that root beer floats are supposed to be served in frosty mugs.
• Spiders are only ever good with Fanta. Seriously.
• This is based on Keeper technology, isn't it?
• PWNED!
• *picks up patent-lawyer redphone*
• Buy! Buy! Buy! Sell! Sell! Sell!
• Why is it that nothing I see on the web ever inspires anything but cynicism? Maybe its me. Here is what I see. A) The thing is made with petrochemicals, and while there may be a recycling path its not clear. In and of itself, I'd give it a pass, IF it served an important or useful function, and was designed to be durable. Well, maybe not, thermoplastics are being found to exude artificial estrogens and the like. B) Its obviously not durable, I expect that this will break the first time its dropped. In and of itself, I'd give it a pass, so long as it was cheap and made of natural materials (ie., sand, wood, bamboo, stone, metal, clay). C) What function does it serve? Children are amazed at the foam the first time they have a rootbeer float. Wait... children like conventional rootbeer floats! Does this add anything to the float? Ah... it lets you choose how much rootbeer to mix with the icecream? BUT YOU CAN DO THAT IN A GLASS. This is, in my mind, just one more example that humanity is doomed. For the sake of a quick buck, I will sell a terminal product that adds no value over and above existing products, possibly causes harm, and is designed to break. Hey, its a free country, no one can stop me. Hahahaha. Give me your money suckers. In fact, I'll even market it to your children and they will annoy you until you give me your money. BWAHAHAHAAHA!
• "Why is it that nothing I see on the web ever inspires anything but cynicism? blah blah blah..." DUDE, 24 for $19.99, thats a steal.
• If you had them, you would have to pay me to take them from you. --- If you have ice cream I will give it to you. If you have no ice cream I will take it from you. This is an ice cream koan.
• Now, that's the sound of one mord clapping. Look as though they've modified the horrible all-too fragile-plastic-cup thing that has been around for a while in the US. (Hurrah for American technology!) Except, that the well of soda on the bottom means that the straw doesn't make it out of the lid. If you want a float, it should be done in an icy mug, or at least mixed together in a sturdy paper cup. If you want ice cream and soda separately, well, why not get them that way? Desperate marketing ploys are fascinating.
• If someone creates a new product, and no-one buys it, was it advertised?
• The energy of a root beer float equals its mass times the speed of light squared. And THAT's whay they serve them in heavy glass mugs. Plastic? Are they crazy?
• thermoplastics are being found to exude artificial estrogens and the like Yeah, I've known that for years. Do you like my third breast?
• Why, Nunia, we can hardly take our three eyes off it!
• Blinky is watching nunia enjoying her Fizz Cup.
• This evil monkey is ripping the head off of the third breast
• Keep your filthy paws of my silky bras! Would you pull that crap with Annette?
• "Announcing the first ever reusable Ice Cream Float Cup!" I read that as 'suede Ice Cream Float Cup.' Got me all excited for nothing.
• You know, it occurs to me that Fizz Cup would be a great name for a porno flick. just sayin' is all.
• Jizz Cup?
• Fizz Cock.
• Fuzz Clip.
• pete, is there any reason on this green earth that you couldn't create a Wikipedia entry so that you could add it to your post? I mean, one damned link post with no wiki?
• Aha! For all of you crazy, mug naysayers, here's the reason you need a Fizz Cup! "Thanks again. The USPS man arrived on Saturday and we had a good Father's day bash. We ended it with the Fizz cup and man my dad couldn't stop talking about how neat they were. He said now he can go driving his 5 speed manual SAAB without spilling his root beer float. Also we had some good friends over and they grabbed your url so you may have some business coming. Just wanted to say everything went great and to say thanks one more time. — Dave L."
• Don't know what went wrong with my commas there. Guess I just got too excited about driving and drinking a float. No more mishaps! Hooray!
• "Stains on my pants? Hooker in the car? No, honey, those are just -- just -- root beer float stains! That's right! I had a root beer float in the Beemer, and the ice cream stained my trousers! -- Dave L."
• Just another one linker with now wiki explaination. How do you suppose I'm going to enjoy THIS!?!?!
• now==dammit, NO
• *sniff* If it's not on Wikipedia, it doesn't truly exist.
• *looks up self on wikipedia* *vanishes*
• If you people would simple attach the handy FizzCup(tm) to your soda bottles and scoop in some delicious ice cream (vanilla's my favorite) you would have a delicous way to enjoy the ice cream float while driving your standard transmission autos around, and you wouldn't have time to vanish or fuss about Wussypedia.
• Can I drink my Fizz Cup float with one hand, eat a tossed salad with the other, and drive with my feet?
• Tossed salad and ice cream? Ew. Das nasty.
• No, no, when done right, with a truly limber monkey and plenty of lube, the Tossed Salad and Ice Cream is one of your more erotic bedroom activites. You'll have to get new sheets afters, though. /Not a pervert //The judge said so ///They were able to blast the chocalate syrup off the walls of that motel and they were never able to prove that those cheerleaders were underage, so I beat the rap.
• *plucks Berek's slash key from keyboard and eats it* AHA! *cough*
• NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! *straps Nunia to operating table, performs stomachectomy with rusty spoon*
• IT'S MINE! ALL MINE I TELL YOU! *cough /// cough*
• *GramMa to the rescue!! Quick, get the hose down. All we really need is this gallon of mineral oil. Be right as rain in just a tick
• Oh, the potty is not gonna like me when this is over. *bu//rp*
• I heard a call for the hose, Gramma! What's pete done now? *hauls fire hose into thread*
• Please hose this mess up, Lara. Oh, and our Petey has a little sticky spot on his chin.
• I'll get it! *Moistens finger with tongue, rubs spot off Petey's chin*
• I'm disgusted, and yet I can't look away.
• Nunia, you have just perfectly described how I feel about Monkeyfilter.
• Nunia, you have just perfectly described how I feel about Berek.
• MonkeyFilter: I'm disgusted, and yet I can't look away. That could be the perfect end to this thread, but noooooooo, you people just can't leave it be. What a bunch of scab-pickers!
• Can I have a boot rear float?
• Er...not if you're fizzing back there, TUM.
• OK, I didn’t think it was a worthy FPP, but I had to share this find with fellow Monkeys. Lieutenant Blender: Frozen Drinks in a Bag! The only thing cooler than the product name is the product itself! And Playboy.com likes ‘em, too!