July 17, 2006

• That oughta hold that bunch of SOBs
• I had a really vivid dream I was spiderman, this morning. It was fucking awesome. I was climbing on walls & shit. However, I was a bit tubby in the costume.
• An emu did that to me once. A vegemite sandwich at Tower Hill. :-(
• *sleeps deeply after 12 beers*
• That emu was trying to save your life. Vegemite will kill ya.
• A topic after my own heart (or liver, as the case may be). Reminds me of an old favourite.
• Oddly enough, me starting up my Shean Connery impershonashion is a shure shign that perhapsh I've imbibed too much. Scottish accentsh are fun, and Shean'sh shlur worksh shublimely whilsht pishshed. Plush, you have to shearch for ash many wordsh ash you can with sh shoundsh.
• Ssshhhuddup! I'm tryin' to shleep in here!
• I'm too drunk to read that right now....
• I think I already communicate too well when I am drunk because people always tell me they couldn't tell I was wasted at times that I was plashered!
• a wee drop of something is seldom amiss unless you're alcholic and then 'tis a dram of the good stuff or possibly two and a warm cozy feeling creeps over you after that, though, things may trickle downhill so better to stop while ye've still got the will
• You did your goddamn monkey dance for the Man and now you get your monkey treat. *cheers*
• And people were worried about me abusing the awesome power to post images.
• a big black bird with an appetite hath stolen my biscuit with vegemite
• IIRC, Modern Drunkard is based in Colorado, USA. Not Australia.
• I could watch that image over and over. The expression on the 'roo's face is priceless.
• "IIRC, Modern Drunkard is based in Colorado, USA. Not Australia." Way to miss a joke.
• Goddamn that kangaroo makes me sad.
• Why? Pretty sure it's well fed. :) (I think it's a wallaby) One time I was at this wildlife park down here in WA, they have literally hundreds of deer & roos just running free, nice koalas, etc. I was feeding this big ol' Roo with pellets, he was lazily just lying on the ground as they do, & this deer wanders up to try & scrounge some pellets, & the freakin' Roo growled at the deer to send it away. I had no idea that Roos could growl!
• ... hundreds of deer ... ... marsupial deer?
• No. Actually, I think they're reindeer. Or something. I'm not sure, because the park's website can't spell & looks like it was made in 1994. There's a shitload of 'em, whatever they are. All deer look the same to me. Tiny, shy proto-horses with funny hats. As you know, the early settlers rather stupidly brought over lots of European game animals they thought would make this wide brown land rather more acceptable to their fox-hunting, rabbit-eating, deer-shooting retarded English asses. Of course, it's really, really stupid to bring in non-native species to an alien country full of prehistoric non-placental mammals, but we're talking about the British Empire here, the same folks who invented piracy & started the African slave trade while introducing opium into Asia. Thanks, guys! Thankfully Cohunu park (which is the name of the joint) keep everything walled off. They don't use the deer as a major advertising draw, either, not surprisingly, focusing on the koalas, red Roos, parrots, dingos & everything else they have down there. It's quite nice. But koalas stink like rancid piss & have sharp claws, & are covered in ticks & fleas. Their cuteness is greatly overrated. They sleep all day & have red-rimmed eyes that look like infected pustules. Their cuteness does not weaken the structural integrity of my cynic-field, Captain. Plus, in the middle of the night, if you live in the bush, you'll often hear a screaming like nothing else - it's the Koalas fighting. Sounds like banshees pulling each others' eyeballs out.
• I was briefly trying to figure out how we got around to talking about deer & roos in this thread about the joys of alcoholism, then I remembered it was my fault for posting that .gif.
• Have I ever mentioned I love crows? They rule.
• Crow Cocktail
• It's a wallaby.
• I'll have a gin & tonic. Thanks!
• Sweet Mothra, I can't stop watching that wallaby. Just the way it stares at its now-empty hands, realizing disappointment. I need a drink.
• MonkeyFilter: Tiny, shy proto-horses with funny hats. You can't really believe I asked for a twelve inch pianist.
• I was waiting for someone to do that. I expected GranMa.
• She's busy wrestling a bear or a robot vacuum or something. I was asked to fill in.
• The deer in the photo looks to be a fallow deer, introduced by the Pommy gits in the 1800s. The much larger reindeer (or caribou) are native to the Arctic tundra, have thick shaggy coats and large racks of antlers with masses of sharp pointed teeth and nasty long razor-sharp claws that can rip your belly open before you can say 'Eric Robinson'.
• Yes, well done, Grasshopper.
• That thing about how to identify teetotallers missed at least one (and many others) -- the "I have nothing against alcohol but it smells really gross one", for one.
• MonkeyFilter: You did your goddamn monkey dance for the Man and now you get your monkey treat.
• Just the way it stares at its now-empty hands, realizing disappointment. exactly.
• That poor animal is a metaphor for all of us who have ever lost anything dear to our hearts. **bwaaaaaahhhh** *exit, sobbing
• Ah, but if you saw the complete footage of that event, you'd have seen the marsupial running after that thieving magpie or crow or whatever and beating the crap out of it! *trying to raise morale*
• It's a Raven.
• Walleroo.
• *wallowing in pity for the poor beastie
• Oh fey sparrow Oh blackbird poor! My apple piece stolen Crunchy nevermore! ("CUT! Cut! . . No, no no! EMOTE you overpaid clown, EMOTE!!") *puts $1 in islander's open guitar case*
• CUT! Cut! . . No, no no! EMOTE you overpaid clown, EMOTE! NO, NO, NO, Clowns are in a different thread!!!!!!
• Oh, I dunno. There just might be ONE here. *points with accusatory finger
• Heh heh. Nice one, GranMa. *dodges nevertheless*
• (I really have to stop checking out this thread -- that vid is affecting me in a bad way. That poor thing, going from vacant-minded contentment to -- nothing. Kee-rist...)
• I think we've all had our apple nicked at one time or t'other.
• Andre the Giant Was the Greatest Drunk Ever from Modern Drunkard Magazine. The Magazine With Profound Daddy Issues. (tm)
• Impressive. Truly impressive. But my sentimental favourite still has to be Orson Welles. And that wallaby still gits me -- like a kick in the guts. Sheezus...