July 14, 2006

• From the belly of the beast Through twists and turns unto the puckered sphincter Shall move the substance fecal-- That is to say, bullshit.
• HEY! Are you dissin' Nostradamus?!
• Way to brighten up the day, Berek.
• I predict that sometime in the future, somebody with a bird, a star, or a crescent in their national flag will have a conflict with some other group that they will percieve as evil. Can I be a Nosteradamus'er too? Oooh, I predict that somewhere right now, somebody is having sex!
• Great. And did N leave any advice one how to get onalark's sister out of Lebanon?!
• I don't think it's all that bad. Only a couple of decades ago it was Russia's turn to lose men in Afganistan, the Middle East situation was worse, there were enough bombs to blow us up a bazillion times actually pointed and ready to launch at each other by god knows how many countries. We've always lived in shitty times, it's just know we have the interwebs to proclaim the sky is falling. Now pass me my M-16, I've some johnny-foreigners to kill.
• Well, seems some people are looking forward to these interesting times. Yep, that site seems to be real... *plans on what to do when rapture comes and is left behind. Mmhh, it's all mine!*
• M-16? I'm not using some foreign gun! Pass me my Brown Bess! As for the Rapture, I've said before, I'm gonna be "Left Behind...and lovin' it!"
• Actually World War III did begin in 2002, just as Nostrildamus predicted; but as a result of the USA's habit of being several years late for any World War, they missed it.
• good one, Pleg!
• Heh!
• Well, they're callin' it "The Global War on Terror." "Global" and "World" ain't that far apart in meaning. I remember my Social Studies teacher telling us in 1988 that "the next world war will be fought over Islam." We all thought he was nutters, 'cause we all knew the Commies were the enemy.
• We have always been at war with Oceania.
• Great. And did N leave any advice one how to get onalark's sister out of Lebanon?! I will check my copy of Nostradamus for travel recommendations.
• Only Chy's unnamed religion can save us now. *adjusts Fez, tunes in secret frequency*
• *grab my weirding module and huddle in corner* The sleeper must awaken. The sleeper must awaken. The sleeper must awaken. The sleeper must awaken. The sleeper must awaken. The sleeper must awaken. The sleeper must awaken. The sleeper must awaken.
• As the Mad Prophet of this thread I feel that you should tune in my frequency. /194.77 Ghz //On the FM dial ///Point antenna at third hill from the left
• Tried it, Berek - all I can get is W.S. Gilbert's ghost.
• Mmmm toast.
• It's called The Chariot.
• Sheesh, world war, what are they talkin about? A couple of rockets fired in the Middle East. A couple of rockets that didn't fire in North Korea. That's not a world war, that's a small pot of petunias.
• A crate of piffle?
• A shoe box of shenanigans?
• A live trap of tommyrot?
• A hill of beans (in this crazy world).
• Hey, where is Louis these days anyway?
• I would say "NO", based on traffic to my satirical site Armageddon Or Not?, which peaked at 2400 hits on 06/06/06, then plummeted to 100-150 a day since. I really thought the North Korean missile tests would get some reaction, but no. Right now, with the Mid-East Tinder Box exploding, most of my search engine hits are for "December 21, 2012", the day the Aztec Calendar ends. So I'd say we've still got six-and-a-half years. I don't even feel like updating it to add the Lebanon Crisis. Feh.
• Self-link! A flag on the play! 10 yard penalty and a beating with a moldy rutabega! Having said that, you all got a good web site goin' on there.
• Actual Nostradamus writings The great man led captive from a foreign land, chained in gold, offered to King CHYREN. He who in Ausonia, Milan will lose the war and all his army put to fire and sword I didn't know you knew the pope, Chy!
• During this time there will also be a schism in the Vatican with an Anti-Pope challenging the Pope for the Papal seat I think FTL travel will be based on anti-pope technology.
• Actually, the most promising line of FTL inquiry is based on beer, albeit very hoppy beer. Transubstantiation to create mundane materials outside of the light cone proved impractical. Papal infallibility ran amok of quantum mechanical principles. The pope wound up actually determining all possible light-paths, correct and incorrect, violating papal-infallibility. It also results in the formation of singularities or the creation of an antichrist to maintain the Einstein-Podolsky-Rosen-Pius II bridge.
• I am not a serious student of recent history, so I may have this all wrong. Probably do. However... Wasn't a major cause of the downfall of the Soviet Union that they had pretty much shot their economic wad on overspending on military endeavors, leaving their people to stand in line for toilet paper and bread? Or is that just Reagan era propoganda (without the Star Wars Deterrent thing added in)? In short, didn't they fail because they went broke? If so, isn't America headed for about the same? One "war" sapping all of our dollars while the instability it has caused saps all petro dollars, while legitimate worry about Iran, Israel/Lebanon/Sryria/Hezbollah becomes a pending payable, while North Korea becomes the same, while Katrina's mess cannot be payed for, while health insurance isn't even a starter... When the Soviet Union fell, it was an historic and unbelievable thud. If the US follows suit, it would be that tenfold. And it appears likely. At least it does to me. Interesting times that we live in.
• It's possible, Ralph, but I wouldn't get seriously worried until Americans are spending all day queuing for beetroot because that's all there is.
• Ralph - that's what a recent book by John Gaddis claims happened, but Dreadnought is studying the Cold War and says that's not really the story (that they were spending so much on military). But I don't know the details - maybe he'll come in the thread.
• Hey, where is Louis these days anyway? Sorry -- I was camping on the beach last week, sunning my belly like a prize-winning sow. So I missed the whole Earth-going-aflame thing. Busy catching up on reading. Especially enjoyed Myra Breckinridge / Myron -- my first Gore Vidal. Turns out the guy can really write! Who knew? But also some other stuff, like a traveller's history of the 100 Years War, E.E. Cummings "The Enormous Room", and a history of 19th Cent. Parisian courtesans. Plus some back issues of the TLS, which I just subscribed to -- $58 Can. for a year! Unbelievable! I'm sorry, what were we talking about?
• I think all things considered, I prefer to talk about the Times Literary Supplement. $58 Canadian for a year you say?
• Special "professional" rate or something. I get these things in the mail all the time. Mostly for crap like Time or MacLean's, for like, seven bucks a year, but even then I'd know I'd be paying for stuff to put in the recycling box. But the TLS? Fantastic! Although it does make me feel awful dumb. Even more so than jb does. Or quid for that matter.
• A letter from my sister, in Beruit: The Canadian cruise ship has arrived in the damaged Beirut port, a gleaming apparition, an obscene wedding cake. Last night at the bar sat in on a fascinating conversation between Timur G. and this terrific woman who’s a writer for the Sunday Times, Hala J. She also wrote the first book on Hizb allah. They ask, you’re Canadian? Why are you going? I say, I’m in love. Everybody laughs and they say, in that case you can go, that’s the only reason. That excuse has helped me a lot, my dear. Both of these veterans—Hala was in Palestine for 3 years before ?the PA? kicked her out, physically, as a security threat, then she went to Iraq, now she’s here “on vacation” and determined to work on her tan whether the Israelis like it or not. Fantastic woman. Both are stymied as to why Hzballah decided to do this maneuver (to kidnap the 2 Israelis) now. Hizballah plans everything to a T. Then there’s a big terminological debate, with me the Canadian as judge: did Hizballah miscalculate or misjudge? (power just went out ... and came back) “I am just a Turk, I don't keep a thesauraus in my pocket!" Laughter, agreement on a term, and a toast to the agreement. Hizb allah misjudged. Timur says, “They are in love!” We all laugh a lot and I make as though blushing, but the mystery is troubling. In Hala's and Timur’s opinions, nobody “orders” Hizb allah to do anything--so why? But otherwise they have a solid analysis. Why it’s been quiet the past 1 1/2 days? Timur: the haze. Israeli smart weapons rely on laser and it doesn’t work when it’s hazy. Listen, they have operators on the ground who “paint” a target, as small as an apartment on a certain floor, with a laser. The israeli pilot only needs to push a button and the missile finds the laser-lit target. Who are these people on the ground? Palestinians. Broken people, tortured, threatened, a brother in prison, they’re going to die anyway but their family will be in trouble for 50 years if they don’t cooperate. Timur says today Hizballah captured maybe 5 of these agents. Also, very scary: nobody really wants Nasrallah to be captured, because whoever might replace him would be worse—more radical, not a politician. Lebanon would become like Iraq with open war between Shi’a and Sunni. God let it not come to that. Bassem likes movies about nature; mountains, prairies, water, especially water. We talked about March of the Penguins, the males huddled together protecting the eggs. I told him about the violent life of Vancouver: sea otters eating fish! Seagulls devouring starfish! Madame Souad comes in to clean my apartment. She’s the one whose home is destroyed, and whose family, refugees now, are all living in this building— yet she asks me if I need anything, if I have food.
• Another letter from Beruit: Of course you are worried about me, but know that I am still safe living in Ras Beirut, which with awful irony is the safest neighborhood Beirut because there are so many of us foreigners here. I fear terribly for my friends here once we should leave. Yesterday I packed with manic calm, putting my stuff into 4 bags, one of which I could jettison with a twinge (my books! My Arabic homework!), one that I would be quite sad to lose (my clothes and the pretty souvenirs I’ve bought for you from Cairo and Beirut), one that I really do not want to lose because it is my brain (my computer) but not my life, and for emergencies my purse (my passports including the hated--sorry American dear ones-- expired US passport, my wallet, dollars, my blue notebook, Lebanese phone, that wonderful invention the USB stick, sleeping pills, earplugs, sunscreen, camera, and lipstick to cheer people up).
• Earwax, thank you so much for posting those exerpts. Your sister sounds like a wonderful person, compassionate, life-affirming and very very admirable. I do hope she gets out of Beirut safely and that this madness ends, before she (and others I know) loose close friends and loved ones.
• Me, too. **cry**
• Ditto. Much love to EarWax and family.
• Indeed. Thanks Waxy.
• *radiates e-hugs over internets*
• Thanks, everyone.
• You know, when I started this thread it was somewhat tongue in cheek. Now that Isreal and Hezbollah are trading shots, southern Lebanon is becoming a free fire zone, The whole of Lebanon is having its infrastructure reduced to rubble, and Thurkey is threatening to invade Northern Iraq. In all seriousness? Things are becoming much, much worse then I ever would have predicted.
• LBB
• LBWWIII
• thanks for posting these earwax. my thoughts are with you and your family.
• More news from my sister in Beruit: I suspect I will be waiting for a few days because they are giving priority to elderly, injured, and children, not hale folks like me. It is actually funny what the emergency officer sent in a mass e-mail to the complaining Canadians: "Thank you for your email. I am writing to you from the Operations Centre in Ottawa. I will now close your case file and get back to the business of trying to evacuate somewhere between 20,000 to 50,000 Canadians from a war zone with no functioning airports, inconsistent electricity and telephones due to the deliberate aerial bombardment of key infrastructure, and a naval blockade imposed by a third party. God bless" But yes I am certainly hoping to go. I've given to the refugees all my towels but a hand towel and all my cleaning supplies and I'm almost out of olive oil, so i risk dampness, dirt, and dull meals. It sounds like humor and resiliance are fighting with terror and despair, and winning!
• "The House of Representatives was expected Thursday to pass by a wide margin a resolution expressing unstinting support for Israel and harshly condemning its enemies."
• un·stint·ing (ŭn-stĭn'tĭng) adj. Bestowed liberally: unstinting approval.
• Good lord - that's madness. More of it.
• Wolf Blitzer says WWIII is no laughing matter.