May 03, 2006
Texas Man Saves Pal During Raid By Chimp
Never piss of an angry monkey:
"His friend's hand was a mangled mess; most of it was gone. The station wagon had stalled after the driver desperately tried to ram through a gate. Now, the chimpanzee that had attacked them on an isolated mountain road in West Africa was coming at them again.
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The story says a dozen chimps had escaped from the 100-acre sanctuary... did they get bored and go back inside it?
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Damn biters. Always ruining a good fight.
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See also Damn you, you dirty ape
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This is why we need robots. To protect us from the apes. Of course, we can't get rid of the chimp sanctuaries, because we'll need them when the robots eventually rebel.
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DON'T. CALL. CHIMPS. MONKEYS. You're on your last warnin', boy...
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Ape Escape!
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Ninjas and Pirates are no good here
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Right turn, Clyde!
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thank you for noting this. it's a pet peeve. re the post and zaphod's link, chimps are large, very complex, very strong, and sometimes very aggressive beings. these incidents should not surprise us; just as humans injuring or killing other humans doesn't really surprise us.
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I wouldn't call 3 feet 110lbs big, roryk. Adult chimps are comparatively small to adult humans but deceivingly stronger due to the evolutionary differences in the muscoskeletal systems of the two species.
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Whenever we go to the wildlife park, #2 points out the chimp enclosure to the offspring and says to them, "Hey kids! Monkeys!" He knows how mad that makes me.
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> I wouldn't call 3 feet 110lbs big, roryk. i think adult male size runs from 4' to 5'6" or thereabouts, and weight from 100lbs to over 160lbs. this may be small in comparison to you, but the upper range is over 90% of my size and i'd consider it "large" (in the same way i'd consider an old english sheepdog a large dog).
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Your thinks are off. Averaging at 3ish feet and 100ish lbs. (accounting for sexual dimorphism) they aren't that large. When you say "the upper range," you should be using large chimpanzees in comparison with large humans (Shaquille O'Neal is in our upper range, no?) otherwise the comparison isn't quite genuine and the analogy becomes way too subjective (a midget is quite large when standing next to a toddler). This is why I used averages - rather poor averages, I might add - seeing as I didn't account for the ape standing; I gave length for a walking ape (not height). Instead, I'll say 4" tall 108lbs. male. Note that apes raised in captivity can sway the upper limits. I understand West African chimpanzees can be larger as well. I think this might justify a decent average. 48' is only about a hand above my navel, and this is when the ape is standing, which apes can do for short periods, but not what they have a tendency to. I don't consider child-size large. Furthermore, "large dog" is an entirely different statement than "large." And by that shaggy-dog analogy there is no way you could fool me into thinking that a chimpanzee is a "large ape" (or a "large being," as you suggested in the previous post). All I wanted to illustrate is that the chimpanzee can have the dimensions of a human boy, but the proportionate strength of multiple adult males. This, I think, is how we could confuse their danger. Jane Goodall Institute Primate Information Network The Humane Society Primates.com