April 02, 2006

Bob Ross: The Happy Little Video Game
posted by es el Queso 18 years ago
  • I believe this was mistaken as an april fools joke by many.
  • This is the best idea ever.
  • I was going to post this, but, well, I'm lazy. Now I have to get Windows or a Nintendo DS so that I can paint happy lil trees.
  • The little tree lives over here.
  • I'd love a game that involved nothing but beating the devil out of the brush. Complete with realistic sounds: twhack twack thawck thwack!
  • I'd rather have a Tony Hart video game, complete with natty neck-scarves and a grumpy Mr Bennet.
  • Mr Bennet is dead. So is Morph.
  • Who is this fucking Ross idiot, anyway? I take it he's a US version of Ken Dole or some other crappy but popular painter.
  • Chy, I feel that you have hate in your heart, and frustration in your liver and "bad vibes" in your thoracic artery. I want to love all of the anger out of you, with soothing brush-strokes of calm pastels on your stress-knotted back and a light wash of pale yellow around those clenched fists. Then I'll paint a sylvan scene across your crotch in refreshing watercolour. Be my canvas of peace - I am your paintbrush set of "maximum chill". Good vibes, everyone!
  • DIEEEEE
  • Does this mean "DIEEEEE" in a clump of happy little trees?
  • DIEEEEE OK, mister! Looks like somebody needs a good dab of rosey-pink on his tummy-wummy, to drive the nasty grump-a-lumps away! Somebody hand me my smock - I'm going in! Peace out, children of the dawn!
  • Or we could just make him wear the pink bunny outfit again. He hates that!
  • Someone has been drinking. "Ken Dole"?
  • Ken Bloody Dole Bludger, more bloody like it! Bloody dole bludgers bloody greenies bloody queue jumpers bloody dole jumpers bloody green bludgers bloody jump dolers. Sorry, just practicing for my upcoming visit. Bloody pom greeners. Strewth.
  • Well, I don't know what his fucking name is, I scarsely regard such people as human. & no I haven't been drinking; I haven't touched a drop in weeks. Which is more than you can say, Worf, you chug-a-lug.
  • who's a grumpy wikkle bunny wabbit?
  • Hey quid -- let's get shitfaced and talk crap.
  • I expect you're halfway there.
  • let's get crap-faced and shit talk That's the plan, my man! Maybe sometime 25-26-27-28 April?
  • And if you turn up in WA I shan't be home. (d'you people actually seriously think I'm being grumpy? I'm just joking around. Dolts.)
  • It's hard to take a man dressed as a giant pink bunny seriously.
  • Good point, Hazel.
  • Bob Ross always puts me to sleep. In a good way.
  • I refuse to look up who this guy is. I want someone to give it to me straight.
  • He's just zis guy, you know?
  • It's the 80's, and your parents haven't sprung for cable yet. You crank the dial on your TV and NOTHING is on. So you sigh and check the public television station. In comes a white guy with a big brown afro. He's painting some scenery on a canvas, with maybe a little lake or a mountain but definitely some trees. And it looks like blobs of green or brown that you could have finger painted better in first grade, but with a few strokes of white, it suddenly pops out - it's a birch tree. He adds yellow leaves. Some mossy green undergrowth. Maybe a rock or two. And a little squirrel. All the while, he's talking softly about what he's doing. In a quiet sing-song voice, he's telling you "add the shadow here, remember where your light is coming from, and up here, I'm going to add a little happy cloud" - and he does it - and by the time he's done, it doesn't look one bit like your finger painting from first grade anymore. It's an honest-to-god painting, all done in about 30 minutes. And you feel so mellow after his show, because he's been talking in such soothing tones the whole time. I think reruns still air on some public television stations, although Bob Ross died of cancer about 10 years ago.
  • Wow. Thanks.
  • ..huh.. wait.. he died of cancer? Well, so much for low stress being a cure for that one, then, eh?
  • Didn't Rolf Harris do something similar way back when?
  • Monkeyfilter: I want someone to give it to me straight. Be careful when saying that within earshot of the quid, Chyren.
  • Mickey: You forgot about the part where he said, "And a little tree lives here." He said that like six times per painting, and sure enough, there would be a little tree there!
  • "Didn't Rolf Harris do something similar way back when?" Still does. Did I tell you I worked with Rolf Harris? The guy is an unmitigated cunt. Absolute megalomaniac. True.
  • Wouldn't you be, with an extra leg?
  • At the risk of opening up some old, barely healed wounds regarding TV painters... Bob Ross makes the funnies.