March 10, 2006

Odysseus' man Eurylochus blogs the big fight at Troy.

"Anyway, Elpenor totally takes the bait, and is like: 'A rough night of conquest General?!' Such a lame innuendo, but Odysseus loves it. He says something like: 'Well, Lieutenant Elpenor, let’s just say that there were at least some parts of Troy that were subjugated on this night!' Frickin’ Apollo’s ass." *snarfle*

  • I hate myself for A)laughing at this, and B)understanding it. The writing's only so-so, though. He can't stay in character; the voice is all over the place. And the seemingly-snarky narrator misses a lot of opportunities, like pointing out that (Big) Ajax was possibly the single dumbest man on the field. (keeps reading) OK, nor does he really understand the honor system at the time... But saying the fight between Ajax and Hector went "on and on and on" pretty well sums up that fight... Oh, forget it. It's a cute link. I'm just a geek.
  • But aren't a lot of real blogs that clumsily written?
  • I like it. I just bet some hapless student somewhere is banking on this saving him from having to actually read the Iliad, though.
  • The Underpants Monster I don't mean the fictional author's casual writing style, I mean the *real* author's inability to maintain a constant voice. Look at Post III for a perfect example. The (fictional) author is hung over. He's talking in short, choppy sentences and acting very snarky. This is good. Then he starts describing Ajax: "Like Odysseus, Ajax is a monster of a man, and he looks every part the leader too. However, unlike Odysseus, Ajax is a quick thinker and smooth talker." Quite a change in voice from the narrator who was saying "frickin' Apollo's ass" a couple paragraphs before. And besides - Ajax was dumb as a bag of rocks, inarticulate, and only a leader because he's the biggest man on either side of the walls. I suspect the (real) author may not realize there are two Ajaxes in the book. (or else he'd make sure to specify "big" Ajax in these discussions)
  • Odysseus not a quick thinker and a smooth talker? Which Iliad is this, anyway? I bet he just got the names backwards in that comparison...
  • -snicker- I love this comment. So Ody, wants to go and build his big horse, so someone leave a comment on the blog: A HORSE? WTF? It will never work. Tell Odysseus that a badger would be much better. First of all, badgers are fatter and would therefore fit more men. Secondly, horses are well-known for their uses in war. If an enemy gave me a huge statue of a horse, I would immediately suspect skulduggery. A badger, on the other hand, is irreproachable.