March 03, 2006

• Oh come on, who didn't give purple nurples when they were young?
• I'm going to sue un-. In England!
• No one ever gave me purple nurples. I suspect that if someone had tried, they would have been hurt. I never understood the idea of physical pain as a joke when I was younger. Someone did the punchbug thing to me on the team bus one time coming back from a game and he found himself on the bus floor rather quickly.
• *makes mental note not to play "two for flinching" with bernockle*
• Like I've said elsewhere, my sister would be jailed for life in this instance.
• Our favorite game in middle school went as follows: person a: "If there was a fire in the school, would you pull that fire alarm?" *points upwards* person b: *looks upwards* person a: *karate chops person b in the adam's apple* person b: COUGH GAG ACK
• *purple nurples* benockle... and what are you gonna doa 'bout it?!
• ... that would be a berNockle...
• Remove your genitalia, place them in a jar of formaldehyde, and mail them back to you after I have received an adequate apology.
• He's not being jailed for pinching a nipple, he's being jailed for refusing to comply with the original punishment. Kind of like what happens to adults if they refuse to pay minor traffic fines and wind up getting a bench warrant issued on them. Hypocrite alert: I'm quite fond of telling people about the night I spent in jail for having a busted headlight.
• he's being jailed for refusing to comply with the original punishment. Yea, they told him to write a letter to explain his actions, and he refused when they told him that the letter had to describe his "criminal thought processes." That seems a little extreme to me. I doubt he even knew that a nipple twister was a crime - I certainly didn't!
• He complied with the original punishment.
• Hmmmm, I used to give my little brother titty twisters. I was a mean big sister.
• I suppose an atomic wedgie is out of the question - pulling the back of their underwear up and over and hooking it over their forehead. I guess putting "Atomic Balm" in a jockstrap nowadays would meet with disapproval. Or snapping at someone in the dressing room with a towel rolled up into a "rattail". Or giving someone an UFIA when they bend over (look it up on urbandictionary or FARQ). It takes all the fun out of growing up... /sighs
• Addendum: Let's not forget "Swirlies" where you suspend someone upside down in a toilet bowl and flush it.
• Just imagine what the sentence would have been like had the kid executed a kancho.
• And just what the hell is wrong with a little nipple pinchy? In fact, I'm gonna pinch mine right now. Come on everyone, let's pinch our nipples in definace. Here I go...ooooh, yeah, that's nice. You like that, Crater High? Huh? Yeah, I thought so.
• A popular one in my school was a 'typewriter'. Tap, tap, tap, tap on the head, followed by an almighty whack for the carriage return. Or a 'LORD' which was, in essence, a blow to the head. Absolutely hi-larious.
• btw, many more schoolday tortures available here
• This is the social role of giving titty twisers to your friends. It teaches how to respond without turning into an overreactionary. Because you ain't a grownup if you can't handle goodnatured ribbing. You're just a sissy, scared everyone is going to find out.
• I agree with Knickerbocker. It's important to learn your place in the social hierarchy, which - frankly - is NOT up there with all the beautiful kids who are good at sports. My word, no. YOU are a little pipsqueak who must learn to enjoy being rogered by school bully. Chop chop lads here comes the science master with his cane. Pants down, Worthington. THOSE UNDERDRAWERS ARE NOT SCHOOL COLOURS, BOY. Six of the best for you, then off to French Class. I have a free period.
• oh sorry I get these odd flashbacks sometimes.
• I'm going to print out the article and give it to my pupils. It should scare the beejesus out of them. Especially when we say we're going to transport them to the US when they do this horrible thing to each other.
• I actually admire the kid for refusing. He didn't think that his act was 'criminal', and he refused to go along with it, no matter that the easier thing to do would have been to just scribble some down some hollow phrases and move on. Good for him! Goof for him, in standing up for himself, even if that means going to juvie and meeting the likes of quid.
• Goof=good. Shut up.
• Ha! Ha! /Nelson
• even if that means going to juvie and meeting the likes of quid Hey, don't knock Juventus. We got Viera, buddy.
• Viera? Pfft. He's only good if you also have a TIME MACHINE to travel back to 1998, when he could ACTUALLY PLAY. You may have Viera, but without a walker and/or seeing eye dog, he's useless. You kill me sometimes, quid... Viera. Classic!
• I doubt he even knew that a nipple twister was a crime - I certainly didn't! If the kid had been just a year or two older (i.e., a non-juvenile), he'd be a Registered Sex Offender for the rest of his just-destroyed life. An example of the unintended effects of overzealousness in the pursuit of justice.
• Hey Bernockle, did you know that the length of your hand is directly porportional to the the length of your face? Go ahead and try it out...
• *imagines over 4000 monkeys with their hand over their face, all over the globe*
• I'm sorry for inflicting you With nerples of a violet hue, But no,'twas not a criminal feat To pinch and twist your manly teat.
• Anyone notice that "Crater" High seems so apropos for a place where the squeaky voiced dwell.
• Flagpole, well that's better than most of the posts where I have to keep blocking out the image of all the male monkeys with their hands... EEEK EEEK EEEK The burning!