February 22, 2006

Pretty, pretty monkey As the northern hemisphere prepares to embrace the vernal equinox and the spring mating season beckons, the time has come to import some fancy beauty products. It's the 3C Seaweed applying Space Capsule! Please note that this device includes Family Cinema System as well as Breeze to face!

The Sludge Ice Blinder is of elegance and practicality; it is mostly for diction eyestrain and dormancy lack. It can eliminate fag and catabatic. Uh-oh. How about an anti wrinkle thermo mask? With emergence of this mask, you do not need to do plastic surgery or take the trouble to rub your face with your hand to remove the wrinkle. Slim mask! Do your Hannibal Lecter impression while it "slims down your flabby face" with infrared rays! Perk up that monkey butt ("up-lift dropping buttocks") with *reusable* silicone buttocks. No more wearing them just once and tossing them away. Eyebrow Purifying Laser System - scour off tattoo and fleck avid angiomo and grog blossom and pigment, etc. No, really! Drooping nipples? This machine sucks drooping nipple, while with the Breast enhancer apparatus "users can re-mold the breasts easily without going to the beauty saloon" - links up the busty electrodes! From Korea: the Dong Jo combination sitz bath and facial sauna! Great for Woman who has itching in the low or Man who have dry face or have much oils.

posted by fish tick 18 years ago
  • w00t! Book me in for a complete renovation!
  • Plump, firm and aggrandize breast? Man, I've been trying to do that for years. Great post. I love Engrish.
  • Better still book me in for English classes seeing as I didn't notice the quirky English phrasing at all...
  • For years I've searched for a product that can eliminate fag and catabatic. And now I've found it! Thanks fish tick!! Seriously though, that seaweed-submarine is teh hawt! With that I can familiar ten secret hopefuls! Jackson!
  • The inebriated space piggy would undoubtedly find the 3c Seaweed Applying Space Capsule preferable to the one launched from a canon.
  • If cetabatic means a lack of whales in one's attic, then my household suffers from it. We also seem to have dormancy lack, too, if this means noticing an absence of doormen.
  • Maybe you could get some doormice? The brest layeded plains on mice ir mein!
  • Note that the seaweed space capsule can be a family cinema system. I would suggest, however, that porn and seaweed mud for two don't really go together.
  • I would suggest, however, that porn and seaweed mud for two don't really go together. *gets shifty eyed, sweats lightly* Ahhh, no... I guess not.
  • acting on your hint, we ordered a doormouse to let us in and out of the house but somebody said doormice were on back order -- today we opened a large packing crate: a doormoose produces such widespread disorder!
  • Does a Monkey truly fling poo, or does poo fling the Monkey?
  • Well, I've seen some flings end up in poo.
  • Well, I've seen some flings end up in poo.
  • Well I like all of these products. And the sludge ice blinder works terrific as a testicle pouch. I have no complaints.
  • One wonders if the reusable buttocks must be bought in pairs.
  • Useful Tip: But, hold! That unwanted fake buttock may be discarded in a nearby intersection, where it will provide passers-by with something more enigmatic than a pancaked sock or an old shoe to contemplate.
  • A single buttock is a but.
  • What is the sound of one but clapping?
  • 2 buts = 1 rump 1 but = ha'rumph!
  • Maybe they're just nippleless rejects from the fake breast department.
  • *afflicted by a ghastly vision: his bee-loved sporting a rump where -- no! no!! NOOO!!! -- he faints*
  • A bee bee-sotted by a bottom-bosomed bumbumblebeetrix.
  • I ENJOY BUM
  • Monkeyfilter: A bee bee-sotted by a bottom-bosomed bumbumblebeetrix.
  • Monkeyfilter: I ENJOY BUM
  • Mmmm . . . I dunno, they both make a good point . . .