February 07, 2006

Canadian Coffee Quaffin' Monkeys Unite! A useful tool for finding your nearest non-corporate coffee places. If your haunt isn't on there, feel free to add it, and curse yourself later for making it popular.
posted by Capt. Renault 18 years ago
  • Now also available for our Brother and Sister Monkeys to the South. *cough*
  • 6 Starbucks found within 3 km of R3L 0B7 *shudder*
  • I know. That's, like, not even a real zip code.
  • why I oughtta
  • I think her modem is on the fritz. Probably one of those Canuck modems you have to plug into a doughnut.
  • A moose-modem?
  • Plugged in my coordinates. At least five of them are gone. How do you delete them? And why is it only Starbucks they flag? Second Cup / Timothy's / Tim Horton's not good enough for them? (Hoping the Husky-sized gerbil-wheel generator doesn't crap out)
  • 3 Starbucks Stores found within 3 km of S7H 1E3 What I learned: 3 km is farther than I thought.
  • Some of the info is out of date for me as well -- my regular hasn't been at the posted address for years...
  • My high-speed DSL cable is plugged into a beaver's ass, just like everyone else's.
  • Yeah, but how many Gigs on yer poutine drive, eh?
  • Yeah, 3km is way too big. My cafe ain't on there. Morala on Bank Street. Best coffee in Ottawa, by far. Tiny little place, so I'm not sure I want it to be busier than it already is. Unfortunatly, my regular local pub, hidden away in small house on a side street has been found by university students.
  • Yeah, but how many Gigs on yer poutine drive, eh? Six million ninety five, just like Werner Herzog's. Actually, it is Werner Herzog's; he gave me his after he upgraded to a 200 trillion gig schnitzel drive with a 50 megaton rocket propulsion processor. He uses it to travel back in time to bitchslap people before they piss him off.
  • Pfft. Those are metric poutines of course.
  • Woohoo! My favorite coffee shop was at the top of the list! Keepin' me awake and stickin' it to the man $2 at a time!
  • Yeah, but how many Gigs on yer poutine drive, eh? So you make da funny about the Canadian eh? It not so funny when we pull up you the pants. Ha ha ha...and laugh while the balls are molested.
  • Beaver's Ass vooman not Kanadian iss; poutine tick she iss.
  • So you make da funny about the Canadian eh? It not so funny when we pull up you the pants. Ha ha ha...and laugh while the balls are molested. I ♥ when you do that.
  • I had 124 cafes, and 32 starbuxes within 3 km of me, so I tried me a little tweak to see what was within 1 km. Load the site, then paste the following in your address bar and hit enter... that should give you a "1 km" option to choose. javascript:var e=document.getElementById('ray');e.innerHTML=''+e.innerHTML;void(0); That narrowed it down to 20 cafes and 2 starbuxes. There's actually a third starbucks that opened in the last couple months that they don't know about yet.
  • javascript:var e=document.getElementById('ray');e.innerHTML=''+e.innerHTML;void(0); Half a moment, old chum, i'm having a spot of bother with your banter.
  • What's wrong with Starbucks? I hear their coffee isn't all that bad (I drink myself) and while they must not pay their employees very well, neither do the small coffee shops I know. Is this about equitable coffee (bullshit) or supporting republicans? (that, I would understand)
  • er. I drink tea myself.
  • Yes, but do they serve the original Walnut Crunches instead of the crappy reformulated ones that don't crunch at all? It's a WALNUT CRUNCH. It should CRUNCH. *sigh*
  • Wanna add a doughnut to them poppies, make it a combo? Eh?
  • ♥ Richer
  • I hear their coffee isn't all that bad Their espresso is good. Their coffee is liquefied rabid rat semen.
  • Of course, you already knew that semen comes pre-liquefied. I'll shut up now.
  • Burn!
  • Cha-Ching!
  • FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SEND OUR CHILDREN HOME
  • War is hell.
  • Dude you know they're frozen, right?
  • "Getting doughnuts into the base takes a back seat to the military's number one priority - armaments and the basic necessities of life for the troops." Are they suggesting that coffee and donuts aren't necessities for life?
  • What are they gonna bet dollars to now? Camel droppings?
  • Loonies.