February 01, 2006

14 Phrases Which Have Never Before Been Spoken or Written by someone who's obviously a little high.
posted by Chyren 18 years ago
  • Well, that was dumb.
  • Um, isn't this person aware of the fact that simply due to the richness of language and the laws of combinatorics and probability that, in any given day, most people say sentences and phrases that are utterly unique in all of human history? Hopping Jesus on a pogo stick, man, the English language has only had its usage, grammar, and vernacular in such a state as to even permit the sentence I am currently writing for mere decades!
  • This is a sentence that can be described in more than fourteen words.
  • Mr Spork: Each thing, insofatr as it is singular, may be said to be unique. Captain Foon: You'll have to spell it for me, Spork. Spork [one eyebrow ascending]: I T.
  • I kind of enjoyed it. I like noting things like this in everyday conversations. Of course, this sentence may never have been stated before in quite this way with quite these words, but it's more the uniqueness of concepts that I'm after. (And not stupid things like, "I, Reuven, will have cereal for breakfast on this here morning of February 1, 2006.") My favorite: "Better a toothpaste than a false messiah." And it totally made sense in context.
  • If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college.
  • This is the stupidest post I ever read in my life. Whoever posted this must have been a little high.
  • I have it on good authority that he ran out of pot.
  • I laughed at the fellatio comment. But then I always laugh at fellatio. It's just SO DAMN FUNNY! The wife's gotten used to it, over time.
  • Better a pasty missus than a false tooth. Mmmhhh, pasty.
  • "You sure this is TP's house?" "Yes, sure. Why don't you knock the door?" "MMhh... wait. I think I can hear laughter inside. Male laughter" "...." "OK, we'll visit another day"
  • I would guess that a significant portion of speech is brand new, given that the individual variation of cadence, intonation, meaning, etc. is simply tremendous. And I've said the vegan bacon one before, freal.
  • "..is simply tremendous" Whenever you say 'simply tremendous' you have to pronounce it 'tremenjuss' and append 'Harry as a boy' at the end. Thus: "I would guess that a significant portion of speech is brand new, given that the individual variation of cadence, intonation, meaning, etc. is simply tremenjous, Harry as a boy."
  • Only a dangerous criminal loonie would do that.
  • Everyone on the internet is so hillarious!!1one!eleven1!!twelve11!!3.141592!won!
  • I believe that whoever posted this is still a little bit high.
  • hmmm...i've always thought that someone being burned at the stake would be unlikely to utter "Oh no! Not again!" what do you have to do in this day and age to get burned at the stake, anyway....I've tried everything!
  • "I've tried everything!" We know.
  • Sexyrobot, try one of those underground "Smolder & Melt clubs...I hear they're HOT!!
  • i find them to be more Smoke & Mirrors, myself...although they are fine for a flogging... think i might just go down to the SCA Faire and tell time accurately...
  • I looked at Medusa's blog and came in my pants.
  • *hoot*
  • Oh, yes. Panties on the brain... And, bernockle: have you tried those pants with velcro on the sides, for a lighting-fast removal? What, why do you all look at me like that?
  • Is having panties on the brain the same as having your brain in your panties? My boss did a spit take when he heard me say, "There were eyeballs in the chicken until Nancy's birthday." Which was perfectly reasonable under the circumstances.
  • YOU READ MY BLOG???? I am so excited. you were one of my first visitors bernockle. THANKS!!! happy panties :D
  • I think Underpants Monster should be my new girlfriend :)
  • I did read your blog. I was going to leave the first comment on there (there were none at the time), but -- with cum in my pants -- I was unable to think of any name other than bernockle to register as. I thought you might recognize the name and think less of me.
  • I said all of those at work today.
  • If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college. Rocket, I take back all the terrible things I said about Fes.
  • Oh come on Pete. Say 'em again. I love to hear you trash Fes. It's even more fun when he slaps you in the back of the head and gives you purple nurples.
  • *readies purple-nurplin' fingers, squints evilly*
  • *readies purple-nurplin' fingers, squints evilly*
  • Hmph.
  • Well, ya gotta say it twice. Once for each nurple.