December 21, 2005

Remo William Raccoon's homepage: a guide to raising raccoons, written from the raccoon's point of view.

Q: Will a raccoon be happy living in a house? A: Ecstatic! Would you want to sleep in a tree and eat garbage and grubs?
posted by tracicle 18 years ago
  • I call the big one bitey! I'm surprised to learn that there are actually raccoon breeders. While I love the waddly little fellers, I still think it's a very bad idea to keep an essentially wild animal as a pet.
  • I hear they're really nosey and get into everything, but are quite loveable as pets. I'll stick to cats though.
  • You forgot the part about the dry-humping!! http://www.mnsi.net/~remocoon/mating.htm
  • I was going to leave that for everyone to find on their own; I'd hate for people to think that was what appealed to me or something. Damn it. The posted link was via kirk, btw.
  • There's a lot of site there though, and not everybody is enough of a raccoon fan (the horror) to read it all! (every word, sigh) It is your sacred duty to at least allude to SEX to get everyone's attention, haven't you ever watched tv?
  • but, kirk has no website in his profile. So how did you get the link from him??? Huh, huh????? However it happened, raccoons are the wild animals I'd love to adopt, but know I shouldn't.
  • Thanks, then, to both tracicle and kirk. Great link.
  • Kirk's a friend of mine, who coincidentally has a livejournal; a veritable wealth of links which I occasionally steal for MoFi.
  • Best. Post. Of. 2005. I'd call mine Zorro. For a number of reasons.
  • There are few things cuter than a baby raccoon. There are few things more annoying than an adult raccoon with a single goal on its mind. There are few things more upsetting than having a raccoon raid your food supplies on a wilderness camping trip leaving only a ziploc of powdered eggs untouched. (But that's because powdered eggs really suck.)
  • Yeah..er...that was Zorro....sorry! Bad Zorro! Look at me when I'm talking to you! Zorro!......Zorro?
  • Our mommy and daddy raccoon (not indoor pets, btw) had quintuplets last year. They waddled the babies up to meet us through the kitchen window. You haven't seen anything until you've seen five identical raccoon babies hanging from a window frame while mom and dad scarf up all the cat food outside. The mommy and daddy have become quite tame over the years. The bad part of this is that nothing will chase them from the cat food. But they're so cute. We call them Ray B. and Mrs. Ray B. Coon.
  • Um... was the raccoon in the FPP named after a bedpan? I'm curious....
  • We have raccoons. We have had raccoons. We have been had by raccoons. One lived in our attic for years. Two or three years back one of its offspring climbed down from the gable and got stuck between the storm window and the interior window, presenting us with a rare view of raccoon underbelly and driving the collie wild with excitement until it finally left. On the whole, I prefer their visits to those of the bears. The bears aren't fond of the raccoons, and in fact one bear swatted a raccoon about three weeks ago, and it died in the lower horse pasture, since which the carcass has proven to be a major attraction for hawks, ravens, and a fox.
  • I'm done with raccoons, thanks to that one Mofo's visit to my campsite last summer. "You've fucking well been here three fucking times tonight -- there's fucking nothing left -- now let me fucking sleep!" Family campground. So I assume the kids are accustomed to that sort of language.
  • Bloody Americans. You get all the fun - Star Wars Christmas Specials and raccoons! You don't know you're born.
  • I believe I have mentioned several hundred times how evil raccoons are. Pet raccoon destroys kitchen. Warnings: Youtube, bad language. Via
  • Hehe I was only watching that last nite. You beat me to posting it.
  • Can you possibly deny the raccoon squee?
  • Once the little bastard opens his horrible, horrible teeth-filled mouth? Yes!
  • He's totally doing Max Shreck in Nosferatu.