November 27, 2005

• Go to Taco Bell and give that menu a good going over. With $11, a man can't go wrong at the Bell.
• That's like three or four comic books. Just sayin'.
• Make it into a whole bunch of quarters. I really love quarters.
• Tell the first person passing by,'Here, have these $11, buy something that makes you happy'. You might make a friend, you might get arrested for terrorism, who knows. Leave $1 in eleven places. Take a pic or video, from a safe distance, of such places and record reacions of those that find them. You might get arrested for terrorism, too...
• Leave eleven dollar bills in eleven places but connect all the dollar bills with clues that will lead everyone to the same place and then, um, then, well, I don't know what then. I'm better with quarters.
• Give it to beeswacky, in return for a sonnet.
• Is the fourteen lines for the price of eleven deal still on?
• (I assume this was a fourteen-dollar bill and a minus-three-dollar bill?)
• Oh. Yeah. That was mine. You can just paypal me $10 and keep $1 as a reward.
• Ya like cheap strippers? Cuz if you do, you can buy a can and strip that damn table like you promised.
• I found €10 today, I feckin' kept it and bought coffee. Why? Because it was just €10 feckin euro.
• If it was, in fact, a fourteen-dollar bill and a minus-three-dollar bill, then I strongly recommend throwing away the minus-three-dollar bill. It is extremely unlikely that there will be any markings on the fourteen-spot that indicate it has a companion bill.
• Theoretically, throwing away a minus-three-dollar bill means that you earn three dollars. I'm surprised they're not more popular.
• Destroying currency is a federal crime in the United States. If we could go around willy-nilly destroying all the minus-three-dollar bills, we wouldn't have such a large defecit.
• Exchange it for various unstable Third World currencies until there's nothing left. Then yell, "BINGO!"
• Send to me.
• Take it to a casino and bet it all on red. You are sure to attract the attention of many beautiful women who love to see a man living dangerously with very small amounts of money.
• You could go in at Happy Hour and buy a short round for a couple of the people you think look interesting, then strike up a conversation. Ain't that a great opening line: I found the money to buy you a beer. Get a date. Fall in love. Otherwise, take it to the store and buy bread. Feed the ducks.
• Moneyjane just made me choke on my ice cream.
• /sees opening for dirty joke, thinks better of it
• Moneyjane just made me choke on my ice cream. We lose so many Monkeys that way.
• you should give it to me. seriously. i wasn't going to tell you this...but i have cancer.
• sexyrobot, I hope that is a sick joke on your part.
• /swears that he didn't blow a seal Really! It's just ice cream!
• What the hell is a pedwalk? Is that what you young hipsters are calling sidewalks these days? God I hate you people. On my 21st birthday I found a bag of weed on the pedwalk. Best. birthday. present. ever.
• I am sure this guy has done the pedwalk
• send the money to me. i'll invest it for you. i'll return the capital plus interest earned when you can be trusted with it.
• Buy Skrik a pony.
• It's a pavement! Bloody colonies. Turn your back for 200 years and no-one can speak proper no more. Sheesh! Oh, and the money? It was mine. I really need it back too, so, you kmow, whenever's good for you...
• $11 is a strange amount to find, seeing how there isn't an eleven dollar bill. Unless, of course, it was a Canadian twenty.
• send the money to me. i'll invest it for you. Yes, but will you work hard for his money?
• I found a $20 on the sidewalk several years ago. I took myself out for a nice lunch.
• > Yes, but will you work hard for his money? no, his money will work hard for him. or something like that. just send money, okay?
• I found a tenner not long ago. I bought batteries for my torch.
• yes, very sick, zanshin, send money now.
• incidentally, i once found a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk in my neighborhood back when i was living in chicago...i was all like, 'YAY', but 2 years later i was all 'damn i wish i never found it, now', as every time i passed that spot i had to look down and all around, some part of my hunter-gathering subconcious expecting there to be another...i finally just had to move.
• Oh, and the money? It was mine. I'm sorry, but I didn't find any money. What I found was scrilla. And I don't know how to feel about the fact that no one has tried to talk me back into giving it to a good cause. MonkeyFilter: uFkc the Homeless -- Get Yourself Something Nice.
• Instead of giving it to the homeless, I strongly suggest giving it to the topless.
• They do look chilly.
• I'd convert it into quarters, like Blanky said, then run into a laundromat and fling them into the air like confetti. Watch the fun ensue.

• And I don't know how to feel about the fact that no one has tried to talk me back into giving it to a good cause.

  perhaps you sabotaged that yourself by noting

  (Besides, a lot of my money already goes to positive organizations.)

  you could give the money scrilla to some negative disorganizations to redress the balance.
• I suggest giving it to The Flat Earth Society. They could use it to buy a globe.
• Drive outside the city limits. You will know you're outside the city limits when you see funny little coffee shops (many of them drive-through only) advertising bizarre espresso drinks modeled on desserts (snickers mocha, anyone?). Now that you are in the correct ecological niche, you need only find the habitat. Go to a gas station, convenience store, or grocery store. At the register you will find a plastic bucket with a picture of a very sad child. Stuff the money into the bucket, which will be going towards said sad child's (memoriam | cancer treatment | kidney replacement | artificial limb) fund. Please note; specific (so far as I know) only to the States. YMMV in other countries.
• The eleven dollars might not mean that much to a homeless shelter, but if it would feel good to give it to them go ahead. Other nice things to do: -- refill parking meters (oddly, this is illegal in some cities) -- use Lara's idea of giving it to people at a laundromat -- Buy some sammiches (coffee, whatever) and give them to homeless people you see -- Buy some school supplies and give them to a local school (teachers can spend a lot of their own money doing this for the poorer kids) -- Eat lunch at a cheap (fast food-y or convenience food) place and pay for the person in line behind you as well.
• $11 is a strange amount to find, seeing how there isn't an eleven dollar bill. Unless, of course, it was a Canadian twenty. Now that's funny.
• put it back where you found it
• That's what all the girls say.