Be prepared ... after all you never know when those terrorists might strike ... but if you think it's all a bit silly ... then you could always take the piss But sady, the UK government has failed to see the joke

The Original Lord of the Rings Movie - 1956 - Long before Bakshi, long before Jackson, did you know Tolkien's master work was originally adapted and filmed by Warner Brothers, starring Humphrey Bogart, Marlene Dietrich, Sydney Greenstreet, Peter Lorre & Orson Welles? Raymond Chandler wrote the screenplay based upon the book from the year before, Bernard Herrman did the music, and all was directed by Howard Hawks. Amazingly, this forgotton masterpiece was never released.. (ahem).. for some reason. Now you can watch it. If you have Apple Quicktime. Right-Click the link & Save Link/Target As if you want to download it. 18.5 MB QUICKTIME movie. Courtesy of The Tolkien Sarcasm Pages more inside

Ouchie. Looks about as much fun as a poke in the eye. more inside

The Andhra Pradesh State Police Crime Investigation Department more inside

Marry Blaire dot com. I'm going to be 27 and I'm ready to get married. Actually, my goal is to be engaged by December 2004. As her "Countdown to My Engagement" clock warns, she only has 155 days left. Her current suitors include a guy who likes DQ Blizzards and "home manicures"; past suitors are catalogued here, and the whole thing is blogged.

Important information from the Ministry of Vague Paranoia And the response from the Cabinet office.

Best. Job. Ever. People wanting to work as strippers in Canada must submit a portfolio of their performances to convince immigration officers they deserve that visa. more inside

river typing game although its in chinese, its pretty fun. figure out which people can cross the river with whom. a lot like blood typing. more inside

Drive-in movie theatres have dwindled, but are being rediscovered and are recovering; offering romantic cinema al fresco under the stars, larger screens, a nostalgic alternative, and also a greater value for your dollar.

Curious George: Does anyone know anything about how long typical multivitamins would last after their sell-by date / best-potency-by date has expired? more inside

Curious George: Admin (or someone) please hope me. more inside

Urban Asshole Notification Cards

Do Monkeys prefer chicken or tuna? After (mis-)identifying some of these sandwiches, one might want to stick with ))'s.

Vaginoscopio is a collection of kaleidoscopic and tiled images of female nudes created by different artists. Be sure to check out the different sizes for the full-screen images. (NSFW if your boss can figure out what you are looking at.)

Curious George: Custom Cell Ringers I have a PowerBook G4 and a Siemens S56 phone through Cingular. Any recommendations?

Go on, pick up the phone.

Do You Remember 1984?

Bill O'Reilly Vs Michael Moore Via Loaded Mouth. I got nothing to say about this. I am very interested in what my fellow monkeys have to say.

Curious George: Getting there ahead of the moving truck - I'm moving to a new state in two and a half weeks and there is a very real possibility that my fiance, the three cats and I will arrive ahead of all of our stuff. Any suggestions on what to do with ourselves with nothing in the house except some bedding, toilettries, a couple sets of clothes and three very agitated cats? more inside

Death Star spotted in our solar system!! Say your prayers, Darth Vader may kill us all! (via fark)