October 06, 2005
Never eat anything bigger than your head
Python: 0, Gator:0.
es el Queso
11 years ago
They cancelled each other out.
Hang on a second, the head of the snake is missing. Where is the head? Did the gator eat the head? This is kind of the moebius strip of animal attacks.
This is a Far Side cartoon come to life.
Fortunately, as any acquaintance will tell you, nothing is bigger than my head, so I'm alright Jack.
So true, kittenhead.
Maitre D: And finally, monsieur, a wafer-thin alligator. Mr Python: No. Maitre D: Oh sir! It's only a tiny little thin one. Mr Python: No. Fuck off - I'm full... [Belches] Maitre D: Oh sir... it's only wafer thin. Mr Python: Look - I couldn't eat another thing. I'm absolutely stuffed. Bugger off. Maitre D: Oh sir, just... just one... Mr Python: Oh all right. Just one. Maitre D: Just the one, sir... voila... bon appetit... [Mr Python somehow manages to stuff the wafer-thin alligator into his mouth and then swallows. The Maitre D takes a flying leap and cowers behind some potted plants. There is an ominous splitting sound. Mr Python looks rather helpless and then he explodes, covering waiters, diners, and technicians in a truly horrendous mix of half digested food, entrails and parts of his body. People start vomiting.] Maitre D: [returns to Mr Python's table] Thank you, sir, and now the check.
WHY COULDN'T THE ARTICLE GIVE A SIMPLE ANSWER AS TO WHETHER OR NOT THE GATOR SURVIVED? stupid stupid stupid stupid
Wasilewski said a 10- or 20-foot python also could pose a risk to an unwary human, especially a child.
Oh boy, I can see the torches and pitchforks already.
spacediver --check out the picture caption:
the snake apparently swallowed the alligator resulting in the deaths of both animals.
Pythons aren't poisonous, right? So this snake squeezed the gator to death? Holy shit that would be amazing to watch.
From the linked article:
Mazzotti said the alligator may have clawed at the python's stomach as the snake tried to digest it.
So the python just swallowed the 'gator alive, I guess. I mean, I like sushi as much as anyone, but I still prefer my meat dead.
I don't think that can be true, because I somehow don't think a live gator is gonna let the snake engulf it in it's jaws. The gator would be rolling and rolling as they do, this would have been pretty difficult. Boas don't eat something unless it's completely crushed lifeless dead, it takes them so long. Something tells me the thing just split open because of the sharp claws and the snake's gut being so distended.
"Wow, I can't believe I ate the whole-" KA-BOOM!!!
Let this serve as a cautionary tale to every parent who has commanded their child to "Finish all of it," under threat of withholding dessert.
This is not a `Be afraid, be very afraid' situation.'
ah thx stripe - i hadn't scrolled down once i loaded the caption text and it said it out of view at bottom.
*Bing Bong* Paging Ray Harryhausen! Mr Harryhausen to the swamp, please.
Sounds like one of those bizarre animal encounters that Marlin had Jim set up and film. Gator vs. Python. Cheetah vs. Grizzly. Packs of Tasmanian Devils vs. Rhino.
Poor Jim. Death would have been better than threading fishing line up a Boa Constrictor's ass in order to drag it along from the chopper...
Another victim of the "Clean Plate Club."
I don't think that can be true, because I somehow don't think a live gator is gonna let the snake engulf it in it's jaws. The gator would be rolling and rolling as they do, this would have been pretty difficult. Boas don't eat something unless it's completely crushed lifeless dead, it takes them so long.
Burmese pythons aren't boas, they're pythons. Totally different creatures. Pythons lay eggs, boas have live birth. Boas usually constrict in coils, pythons usually constict by clumping up. Neither measure life remaining in their prey, they just wait a hella long time while crushing it. This is effective for warm-blooded critters, their usual diet. Cold-blooded critters have much slower metabolisms, making it damn hard to suffocate them. They can pretty much shut off for long periods of time. While smaller prey often have most of their bones broken while being crushed, large prey are structurally stronger, and die from suffocation, having their lungs/throat constricted. The gator's rolling, usually damn helpful for the gator, wouldn't hinder a snake at all. In fact, it'd help the constrictor class ALOT. Just a couple rolls would help the snake totally pin the gator. It's totally possible that the gator was still alive when eaten. Probable even. It's not amazing the gator was still alive, what's amazing is that the snake ate it at all, especially that small of a snake. Thirteen foot pythons eat bunnies and shit. WTF is it doing eating a gator? Snakes aren't into overeating, as each meal renders them pretty damn helpless, and large meals take weeks to digest. At least part of the snake has been moved after it's death. I don't know if it's from the gator still moving, some other creature that possibly killed the snake, or maybe the news people moved half of it to get the whole thing in one shot.
Oi Mistah Knick, quoite eenfo'mative!
my theory is that the python ate somebody's bag of weed that was thrown out the window, then got serious munchies
at least 150
have been captured in the past two years
What's going on here? Is there a drop-off site in the Everglades where deadbeat pet owners can drop off their Burmese pythons? Are they reproducing in their nonnative environment? I'm thinking nested eggs: Human eats (insert almost anything) ----->
Gator eats human
-----> Python eats gator
Croc/gator, hell, I can NEVER remember the difference. And what the hell will eat the python?
Exactly how tough is a big old python? I realize they can kill just about any large animal that can't fight back well, but an alligator has those claws and big strong jaws full of teeth, and they're at home in the water. Is a python's skin really tough enough to resist that kind of punishment? Or is it a speed thing? Is the python fast enough to keep the gator from getting a grip on it?
Is it just me, or did anybody else see that photo and think of
I stand corrected but I still have a hard time believing the gator was alive. I mean, it was dead when they found it.. must've been pretty fucked up. Boa, Python, whatever. I don't do snakes.
Exactly how tough is a big old python?
Not tough at at all. But it takes very little effort to keep a gator's mouth shut (It's a croc, not a gator, but you know, whatever). If the arms could reach the python, then that means the python can reach the arms, and they'd be totally immobilized. Take scotch tape and wrap it twice around your middle and index finger. Now try to move them apart from eachother. You can unwrap it pretty easy. Just start at the end and unwind it like a spool of thread. But if you don't have any extremities that can reach the end, you ain't going to be able to just brute force your fingers apart. That's what it's like being pinned by a constrictor.
Is there a drop-off site in the Everglades where deadbeat pet owners can drop off their Burmese pythons?
Tons of people get large snakes and then decided years later that they're sick of it. And although there likely is somewhere in their area who'd take the creature of their hands (I used to work for such a rescue), they are usually hard to locate, especially because humane societies often won't forward these people to such a rescue. Asking a humane society for alternatives is kinda like calling up a cop to report a crime, but asking them for alternatives because you don't like the way they do business. So people just release them outdoors somewhere. usually, it's in an inhospitable climate, and the creature dies eventually. If it is somewhere compatable, the creature might not. The reason you don't hear about so many close to your home is because they haven't survived, not that just as many haven't been dropped off.
Boa, Python, whatever. I don't do snakes.
I feel the same about distguishing gators from crocs. Whatever. Yeah, a snake filled with gator ain't going nowhere for a long time, and pretty much anything could've come by and fucked it up. It's tough to say without closer pictures.
dang, Zanshin stole my tagline! Oh, and the whole story is a lot of croc
Note to snakes: do not attempt to squeeze an armored animal to death. That trick works better on soft, squishy things like deer and poodles.
eeek! Don't give that snake ideas.
I would rather Mr Engel had got pussied, the smug, beard-wearing, bike-riding hunter fuck. Few things make me as angry as those gobshite pictures retard hunters always have taken of themselves next to the animal they so bravely shot to fucking pieces with their high-powered rifles. Cnut!
Woah, there, tentacle head, in this case there's a pretty good justification to blow the beastie away: it's got no place in the Aussie outback and is an ecological threat.
I wonder - if it's on it's own, it can't breed, and if it ate enough wabbits it'd be doing the Aussies a favour. Are the deer this guy was hunting indigenous? Cos besides the odd wombat, surely a cat that size would chaw on deer too? And even if it did breed - good fucking luck to it. It'd be making up for the Iberian Lynx, the American mountain lion, the tiger etc etc. I'd like to see some big fuckers wandering our countryside. Keep us on our toes.
He was probably hunting roos or foxes, rabbits. Deer are not indigenous. Well, there's a breeding population of these things out there, which I've heard many, many times from farmers, who until now nobody really believed. The problem is that the cats are taking many species which are endangered and don't need any help getting wiped out. Choice between a slow moving marsupial which is not adapted to flee a large cat and a fast moving bunny, the cat is going for the marsupial. Under normal circumstances I agree with you, but in this country there are genuine reasons for culling.
Yeah. And you're on the list, for constant spelling nazisnm!
ya see what I did there?
Yes it was very ironyc.
No, Kit. Fangs.
Fangs for the memory!
© Carry On Screaming
The Mill Back Home Logs drowse in the pond Dreaming of their heroes Allogator and crocodile
-- Vern Rutsala
Al O' Gator of course is Irish.
As is Croc O' Dyle.
Or anywhere else, for that matter...
Never eat anything bigger than your head
. Also, your tits shouldn't be bigger than your head.
Aahh, nothing like squatting in the filthy sand on a dreary beach, waiting for your tits to explode.
Hey moneyjane -- if it's nsfw, put it in as a link. The warning is completely pointless otherwise.
I am a FIRM believer in the "tits != yr head" rule. that is just so disgusting.
The warning is completely pointless otherwise.
oops...half asleep when I posted this..
mmmmm . . . tits
Not just tits ...