April 06, 2005

Curious George: Who wants my child? I'm using up my infinite Curious George quota lately: my dear son drew on our concrete driveway with permanent marker today. Any idea how to get it off, shy of waterblasting? It's one of those coloured-concrete dealies and I think waterblasting it would probably be bad.
  • We have something called Goof-Off here that takes that stuff right on up. You can get it at hardware stores. But concrete's pretty hard to clean, being porous and all. Might want to just paint over it. No real harm, right?
  • I have used something called OOPS! Water-based cleaner and remover (link goes to first hit on Google) before to remove my niece's permanent marker drawings on my wall. No idea if it will work on concrete, though.
  • a chemical called "butyrolactone" will take off all "permanent marker" colors and leave no trace.
  • You could also do what my housemate did when his daughter drew various "dream-catchers" (consisting of a morbidly obese lion and three birds with varying numbers of legs, eyes, and wings) on the wall over his bed: laminate it for posterity.
  • Tincture of Time helps, too. And peeling out of the driveway early in the morning going to work will help disguise it. (What, he didn't do a permanent marker tatoo on himself? The other big shocker is their first self haircut--the little shi darlings.
  • Heh! Just keep him away from paint-sprayers for the next twelve or so years. And everything will be okay.
  • No haircuts yet - we don't let him anywhere near scissors for that very reason. Give it time... orococo, I did a google search in NZ for that substance and most of the links are to party/rape drugs. I'm disturbed now. :) Painting over it wouldn't work because it's a sort of patchy (presumably deliberately) job and has worn/faded in some places and not others. We'd have to do the entire, rather long, driveway. Maybe next year. I'll try to track down something along the lines of the Oops! and Goof-off stuff. It was a bit of a dumb question, since the products in NZ will be different, but I'd just discovered the rather large and obvious marks and panicked. I thought of you guys first.
  • First of all, you really should post some pictures of it to flickr. This is a second recommendation for Goof Off. I don't know if they sell it in NZ, and I can't find their website, so here's a couple amazon links to their products that I'd recommend trying. (Amazon ships to NZ, right? If not, you can at least see what it looks like.)
  • I find locking the offender in the out-house for a while helps with re-offending... (joke, BTW)
  • You can get Goof Off in Australia & NZ, try paint product suppliers, I'm pretty sure I've actually seen it on a shelf, or a product that's near identical. If you've got a Mitre 10 store near you, they stock it, iirc, but basically any big hardware joint should have this or similar. '30 seconds outdoor cleaner' probly will work. If you want eco-friendly stuff, in which NZ abounds, there is a product range called Simple Green which is very good at removing all sorts of glue, paint & stuff. To be absolutely honest with you, I'm pretty sure good old WD-40 & a bit of elbow grease will get rid of this ink. In any case, it will fade over time or due to weather, if it's exposed. The concrete paint should actually be waterproof, so the stain is only on the surface, not soaked in. It'll wear off.
  • Sweet, thanks Mr F. I definitely know I can get Simple Green, if nothing else.
  • If it's like the coloured concrete drives I used to lay for a living as a feckless youth, the colour is added as a powder while the concrete's still wet and soaks down penetrating the top inch or two, so a bit of abrasive cleaning as Monsieur Furieux suggests shouldn't take the colour off too. Maybe test an out-of-the -way spot first.
  • my dear son drew "quidnunc for pope" on our concrete driveway with permanent marker today I don't see the problem here.
  • Until his head started spinning and the pea-soup barf appeared...
  • Mmm ... soup.
  • Has the bidding yet started on the child?
  • YARNTHC (yet another reason not to have children, my set answer for such mishaps)
  • Because I own a child farm and am running low on stock. Please advise.
  • You should go to your nice neighborhood hardware store, and ask the guy working there. There's usually at least one or two guys working at stores like that who know how to fix just about anything. It can't be a home depot though- big stores like that just stock everything. Someone working in a smaller store typically knows their products better, and has made informed choices of which ones to stock.
  • Time. . . permanent marker isn't really permanent, especially on concrete. I bet it will fade & disappear. Now, permanent marker on unfinished wood coffee table - that is *really* permanent. Even if it does say "I lov mommy" (the kid has always been brilliant, little demon.)
  • Just wait until he starts graffiting Monkeyfilter taglines on neighbours' walls... ha!
  • Try some TSP (Tri-sodium phosphate) if you really need it clean and nothing suggested above works for you. If that doesn't work, and you really REALLY want it cleaned off, you can use muriatic acid, but i'd highly recommend hiring a professional if you're going to go that route. More info here.
  • Nothing to add except that if you do try any of these products, be sure to test it on a less conspicuous part of the driveway in case it damages the color of your concrete.
  • 1. Paint a frame round it and call it Art. 2. Charge admission. 3. Profit!!!
  • MonkeyFilter: Just wait until your spawn starts graffiting Monkeyfilter taglines on neighbours' walls... Thanks, Flagpole
  • Sunshine will help with the problem, of course. The real problem is the permanent marker. At our house they are all on top of the refrigerator. I had a physical twinge when I saw one on the desk at a friend's house, even though they have no kids and I did not bring mine. Favorite threat: "I will mail Sharpies to your children." Good for a laugh. If you have a child like my first one, the best way to take care of hazards like this one is place the child in a room. Then watch him, and get to whatever he is after before he does. Then watch him again, and go after the next item (which until now you did not know was a threat to child or house), and take it away. I really must clean off the top of the 'fridge. That child is 13 years old now.
  • Monkeyfilter: I'm disturbed now. :) (I was thinking that before I got to Flagpole's comment, too.)
  • 1. Nail Polish Remover 2. Gasoline 3. Mineral Spirits/Paint Thinner 4. Toluene Not all at the same time though, and no open flames.
  • yes open flames!!
  • That's your answer to everything.
  • EarWax and I have the same child!
  • May I name your child, mygothlaundry & EarWax? Please?! I've got a couple already thought out: WaxyGoth EarLaundry
  • Many - of the old school permanent markers use Xylene as the solvent to carry the pigment. That may be an option. Hard to find, and toxic as hell. (but then what solvent isn't?). I'd test whatever you choose on a bit of unseen concrete to be sure that your solvent of choice doesn't remove the pigment from or mark the surface of the driveway.
  • I have found that a mixture of 2 parts of Catherine Zeta-Jones' saliva and 3 parts of my semen will get out just about anything.
  • True permanent marker story: (sorry for the derail, but hopefully this'll give you a chuckle and the realization that it could have been much, much worse! *I* could have been your kid!) When I was 4, I had chicken pox. I had them really badly, and I felt like poo. When I got better, then, I felt really *Really* good! My grandparents were watching me while I was too sick to go to nursery school, and as I'd been so sick, I'd been a good kid and not my usually silly self. On the first day that I felt human again, they were outside putting in the garden for Spring. They thought they'd only been outside for about an hour, and that Sesame Street would babysit me. They'd been out four hours, and the hated Mr. Rogers was on! I was bored! And full of the hell that only 4 year olds can muster! So I got a permanent marker and "redecorated" my grandparents' house. It was awesome. There was a big, black, satisfying line at about 4 feet tall all over the house. I gave all of my dolls mustaches. I gave many pictures mustaches. I "wrote" people's names on their possessions. I drew really pretty pictures. On their expensive Ethan Allen furniture. I drew dots on my pox. It was the best day ever, until my grandparents came inside. The horror! The amazement! The smell! They called my mom, who advised murder. However, my grandparents figured that they'd been outside way too long for a four year old, so it was really *their fault* (ha ha ha!). Nothing happened to me, and it took them about ten years to undo all of the damage. I was a rotten kid :D
  • That being said, I think a mixture of baking soda and salt -- and lots o' elbow grease, did get the marker out of some things. It's just an abrasive that won't bleach out colors.
  • That sounds expensive, bernockle. Plus Zeta-Jones gives me the creeps. I couldn't handle her saliva being on my driveway. Child sale withdrawn as spawn being sufficiently cute and obedient this morning. I would, however, like to know who mailed him the permanent marker as we don't even own one like the one he used.
  • It's not expensive at all. In fact, I have several ziploc bags of it in my freezer ready to go. I can ev-- Oh, I see. You meant the Zeta-Jones saliva may be expensive. Yes, I agree.
  • MonkeyFilter: Open Flames!That's your answer to everything.
  • bernockle - funny stuff, a near coffee-spew moment.
  • You sick fucks.
  • Give him a toothbrush and some toulene And tell him to brush his teeth with toulene.
  • Regarding the child, is it a fresh, juicy child or a somewhat stringy, bony child? What condiments go well with fresh child? Just curious. . .
  • Nostril, nobody makes me smile quite like you do.
  • Thanks, & I'm glad to hear it. I don't smile much anymore, it's good that someone does. My humor is all black and internal these days. Like my women.
  • You sick fucks. Yay!!!11!
  • Nostril, if you have internal women then you'll be wanting to see a gynecologist to have them looked at. Might explain any mood swings as well.
  • Nostril...I'm black, I dunno about being internal though. Can I be your woman too? Please? Pretty please?
  • Are you actually a woman? Cos in that case, yes. For internality, please see: Frank Zappa's "I have been in you" lyrics for more clarity. As long as you dig emotional white guys with a penchant for beer & marijuana, we're good.
  • Last time i checked i had all the requisite womanly parts, Nostril.
  • Good. I hope you like mindblowing sex & living very far away from America.
  • I'm not a woman, but can I be your gimp? I have my own mask.
  • He does, you know. It's got feathers on it and everything.
  • I would enjoy both mindblowing sex and living very far away from America. Right now, I got a whole lotta nothin' on both accounts.
  • I love that this thread has gone from "who wants to take tracicle's child" to "who wants to bear nostril's children".
  • I would enjoy both mindblowing sex and living very far away from America. Right now, I got a whole lotta nothin' on both accounts. Me neither, but I am working on fixing both.
  • I feel you but meredithea...are you black AND internal? Me? I got it goin' on all both fronts AND i'm all up for sex (of the mindblowing kind...heck, of any kind...these days!) and living far far away!
  • I'm painfully Caucasian and have dangly bits. May I have sex with someone in Australia?
  • I'm caucasian and married, but would like to hear all about mindblowing sex in Australia, in minute detail, with pictures please and thanks.
  • Well, once there was a man called Bruce, who loved his wife Sheila very, very much. One day, under the shade of a coolabah tree, up jumped Bruce's jumbuck, so he jammed it in Sheila's tuckerbag. Then their friend matilda waltzed by and joined the fun. After five minutes, Bruce asked "Have you come, waltzing matilda, with me?"
  • Transplanted Australians work just as well for mindblowing sex. just sayin'
  • People...do you mind?!! I'm trying to have a "tittilating" conversation here with nostril! You're messing up my chances for mindblowing sex, lots of beer and mj down under!
  • I'd be careful about putting that mj down under, ramix, but they say a beer rinse does wonders for the hair.
  • Damn straight, quid - us Bruces have big billabongs!
  • Thanks Uncle Quiddy! Can I get off your lap now?
  • Monkeyfilter: I hope you like mindblowing sex & living very far away from America. Sorry, I had to.
  • I can't compete, ramix... I have too many red-headed ancestors, so I'm so white I practically glow in the dark. Also, I've been told by many that I have no internal censor :) If it's in my head, I'm probably saying it. though I have been known to make men speak in tongues during the act of nookie
  • Best end of thread ever! Nostril, welcome back!!!
  • Motor oil will obliterate the marker, and gallons and gallons of lemon juice (if I remember correctly) will eventually obliterate the motor oil. Tho of course that's not the subject anymore, you perverts and pervertesses.
  • goofyfoot: PLEASE don't do that anymore. Nostril is now buying up 30 weight for an afternoon of kinky sex. Pucker up, you horny emigrants
  • Kiss kiss! What's a 30 weight?
  • (naturesgreatest is about to emigrate to Aust. I will force her to drink coffee or a glass of something when she gets here.)
  • 30 weight is motor oil rated 10-30 or 10-40. There are different weights of oil depending on engine use. We lube up a lot around here
  • *smacks self on forehead* I thought it was some Aussie-ism.
  • tracicle, alchohol does a great job in an instant. Also, you think that's bad? My three year old (at the time) took a just-opened, LARGE, bottle of olive oil (instead of the FAR cheaper canola), and spilled it's entire contents all over the couch. It made it's way all the way to the carpeted floor. Good times, good times.