July 12, 2007

• I can relate. I had chronic fatigue syndrome in my late twenties. My story in a nutshell is that I went to a traditional doctor for the diagnosis but he was unable to find a treatment for it. I finally ended up going to an Acupuncturist who not only treated me with needles and traditional tonics, but put me on a strict diet (to ballance my chi) and had me give up any drinking, drugs, etc... It took about a year and a half but it was worth it. I guess I don't have too much advice other than do what ever you need to to get better. It gave me back my life. One thing that occurs to me. There are all kinds of prescription drugs, more than likely including Naltrexone, that are availble over the counter in Mexico. You could also try the Canadian pharmacists via the net. Both options would keep this medication off your records in the US (if that's where you are) or where ever it is that you live. Talk to your doctor who might know a way for you to obtain this from an overseas source.
• Well, your lovely relatives can't get access to your medical records, so why do they even need to know? I'd be more worried about future insurance issues, but on the other hand, if you've got all these other conditions, alcoholism would probably be the least of an insurance company's concerns. (And personally, I'd go with alcoholism over drug addiction if you're getting to choose your fake diagnosis... less stigma attached to it.) I absolutely do understand your emotional objection to being labeled something you're not, but I've dealt with chronic pain issues in the past too, and I tend to think practically when it comes to health issues. Do what you need to do to get the medicine and feel better. Then you can start fixing everything else. Good luck.
• I am inclined to side with the lovely h-swamp. If you're outside the States, I can't speak to the legal aspects, but I'd expect that likely they have no legal way to access your medical history, so they wouldn't know if you were officially diagnosed alcoholic. My only concern is any future difficulties you could have with that on your medical record, but it sounds like you've got far bigger fish to fry. Do what you have to do not to hurt as much, within reason. Easy for me to say, but fuck what anyone who gets off on lying about you thinks, blood ties or no.
• I would only worry about having alcoholism or drug addiction on your medical records if you think that you will ever apply for a job where they would look at those records (certain government jobs, elected office, etc., depending on the privacy rules for where you live). I thought I had CFS for about a year, and I had a really tough time getting a doc to take me seriously (I kept being offered anti-depressants, which I'm not again, but I felt the depression was a symptom of the fatigue, not a cause. Come to find out I had a really bad black mold infestation and a mold allergy!). I think it's good that you have a doc who's willing to work with you!55
• oops -- the extra numbers are compliments of the baby!
• I am also confused why anyone in your family will be seeing your medical records. Are you very young, or sometimes in such rough shape that they might be in the doctor's office with you? Do you still live at home? Do they pick up or pay for the prescriptions for you? If that's the case, I would suggest scraping together some cash, ordering from an online pharmacy and having it delivered to a trusted friend's house or your office. Put the pills in another bottle and keep it somewhere they don't look.
• My guess would be that the poster might live in a smallish town, where his/her medical records or prescription could be a matter of discussion for a doctor, nurse, clinic receptionist, pharmacist, pharmacy cashier, etc., and if any one of those happens to associate Naltrexone with the poster (or if a family member or acquaintance spots the label somehow), whispers of drug dependancy ("didn't I say so, Gladys?") may spread like wildfire. If it were me, though, I druther get rid of the bodily pain and hell wif the relatives.
• There's another issue in that strictly speaking this could be seen as fraud, aided by your doctor. I hesitated posting this. It seems stupid to fret over these niceties when someone's health is at issue and of course this sort of fudging should be unnecessary. Still, something in the back of my mind keeps saying that receiving a benefit because of a lie is a bad thing. Not that I personally would blame you in the slightest for going ahead and doing it.
• I agree that your first obligation is to yourself here. Do what it takes to feel better. You can shine on the relatives who would use this as gossip, and tell those who are close to you what your intent is. Those who love you will understand, and the rest...you can take them on when you're feeling better. Maybe they don't even have to know, ever. You know who you are, just keep that in mind. Other opinions are temporary.
• Make yourself feel better. Problem relatives are going to be problem relatives one way or the other -- why not feel as good as you can while you're having to deal with them?
• Before Wellbutrin was approved to help with quitting smoking, I knew people whose doctors had written "for depression" on the prescriptions. And I've known people whose insurance companies wouldn't pay for the Pill for contraception, so the doctor offically prescribed it for "amenorrhea." So FWIW I suspect that it happens more often than we realize. Let me add my voice to the chorus of the Worry About the Pain First Singers. (Our first single, "Hurts So Good - Not!" hits the airwaves next month.) I've known my share of CFS and Fibromyalgia sufferers, and it never ceases to amaze me how their otherwise loving friends and family can be such arseholes when it comes to their illnesses. Stay frosty!
• Why would you be concerned over someone in your family finding out about it? Just don't tell anyone. Problem solved. The fact that you posted this suggests that you have some reason for thinking that they will. This could be because you are a minor, but if so, you are so ill that you must be born in Chernobyl. So the other likelihood is that you are in a custody battle or some other kind of legal entanglement. Maybe a family member or spouse could use subpoena to gain your records and allege some kind of mental incompetence, put you in hospital or so on. Just speculation. The other thing is how does a doctor determine you have these different illnesses? Chronic fatigue should be indistinguishable from the fatigue associated with arthritis. Spondilitis is an arthritic disease with associated rhreumatoid characteristics, it doesn't only happen in your spine though that is the classic definition. How does the specialist tell that the two conditions are separate? How do you know that your fatigue is not associated with the arthritic inflamation? They go hand in hand. I know someone with a similar condition who has this kind of fatigue. Seems like an unusual lot of illnesses you have. My spouse is a GP & frowned over my shoulder saying it seemed to be excessive, but then there are such unfortunates. This sounds also like your doctor is willing to commit fraud. I would be questioning the competence of a doctor who thinks this way, but then maybe that is too your benefit. I would be nervous under such a persons care. Also, there is no statute of limitations on fraud under some instances, you can have done something in, oh, say 1980s & that can come back to bite you, if a legal agency finds out, or if a particular legal angle is sought by prosecutor(s) or if you are sought as witness if the doctor is charged? You better be sure you haven't done a single other thing wrong at other times, because under legal scrutiny they will pore over all your bank records and audit you to check money flow, very unpleasant.
• The way I understand it, it's not explaining the medication itself that's the issue -- it's absolutely true that Nalprexone is used to treat RA, which everyone knows you have. So no reason for anyone to assume it's for alcoholism. As for the fraud issue ... given what the alternative is (not being able to afford the medication you need), I see it as the lesser of evils here.
• So sorry for your troubles. Your health comes first! Screw the stupid drug laws--so in two years they may change, who knows? Your doctor sounds like he wants to do the best for you. Take a drink ;) go in, and get your drugs. Then your doc can swear in court that he knew you were drinking at the time he wrote the RX (yes, alcoholism over drug abuse) Get your drugs; believe me, if you feel better, dealing with all this crap will be easier. As for people knowing...what makes you think anyone would find out? Can you post your concerns here. Perhaps we could brainstorm and help with that. Medical records should be sealed, and you can hide your RX. Explain to your doc what's going on and why you'd not want this issue on your record. Sounds like he's a sympathetic guy who is entirely concerned with your best interests. As for going to court, if you think you're going to have to, drop the RX. Drugs you've taken in the past are not relevant to any situation you'd be in currently. I would imagine if something would occur that a judge would subpoena records, only the current drugs would need to be listed. The fact that you have all these medical conditions documented by a doctor who will also vouch for your mental clarity would be a black eye for anyone claiming that these are issues. certain family members have a history of spouting slanderous and/or libelous statements to the effect that I am both an alcoholic and illegal drug abuser. Over the last 6 years, add AIDS and "attention seeking" to that list! Sounds like any of these people wouldn't have a legal leg to stand on anyway, if you document what's been going on and have loved ones vouch for the truth of the statements. If your loving family and true friends are willing to stand by you thru all this, then I'd say try to develop a thicker hide and ignore the crap. Sure it's hurtful, but consider the source (assholes) and move on. They and you know the truth. Dump the toxic relatives. If you're not around them, they won't have fresh information to spin more nasty stories. Re: others with different diagnosis or suggestions of alternate therapies. Sure, nothing is wrong with asking your doctor some questions or trying something alternative, provided you can afford it, but I'd say stick with your current treatments. RA especially has a absolute diagnoses with testing, and just that is enough to cause all the other symptoms you have. If you trust your doc and can talk with him, everything's sweet. Good luck to you. Please keep us posted as to the outcome of this. We worry about you, MonkeyMate! I vote go for it. And if you have any identifying information in your profile, change it just in case. Remove your email and get something untrackable and anon, if you need to communicate with us.
• mailto:iamnotanalcoholic@sober.com
• LOL
• I also know people with Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia. It's amazing how friends and family will make light of their suffering, telling them it's all in their head. I'm not surprised if Simian XX's family is not being supportive and labeling him/her as "attention seeking". That seems to be the current climate for reception of these diseases. People are jerks.
• Get the drugs. Feel better. Punt the world (including relatives).
• Try contacting the drug manufacturer...they may have prescription assistance programs for off-label use.
• not being overly familiar with each diagnosis, I googled each one and read about them. they sound pretty hellish and I'm sorry that you must deal with so much pain and discomfort on a regular basis. It's very unfortunate that not all of your family members are capable of being caring and supportive to the degree you need (or even any degree!) but as the overwhelming number of commenters have said: take care of yourself first. your doctor has offered you a way to get the meds you need at a price you can afford: TAKE IT! while it is certainly valid to be concerned re fraud I think this sort of thing is very common, my goodness, I wanted Retin-A to reduce the appearance of very minor acne scars, but that wouldnt have been covered by my insurance so the nurse prescribed it for acne, which I dont have. and this is about as trivial of a "medical issue" as one could have, where as you have some pretty significant challenges healthwise. take the help that is offered, your condition (improved) will speak for itself, and otherwise, you can be the town scandal! woohoo ;) feel better!
• Many thanks to all who have passed on support, thoughts, ideas and different perspectives. You have helped enormously, especially to change my perspective and help me realize it is my fears, rather than realistic outcomes, that have stymied me. Too close to the subject and emotions get in the way of rationale. In answer to some questions. The RA is a continuation of Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis I've had since childhood. Early 20's the 'flare-ups' stopped for a while but I had a severe bout of measles mid 20s' that 'triggered' the RA again. Also the onset of AS. Yes, I have had many, many tests, of all kinds. More than I care to count in fact. The AS went into remission in mid 30's (leaving fused discs in lower spine) but RA continued the pattern of flare-ups. Mid 30's I had to use walking sticks to get around but by late 30's flare-ups became less frequent and I had the greatest of enjoyment in throwing the damned sticks in the garbage. I've swallowed more types of garbage medications for RA than you can imagine. The side effects were worse than the pain so eventually decided to throw the lot into the nearest bonfire and stick to aspirin. Latterly that has changed to stronger stuff but still aspirin based. (continued ...)
• Recently the RA has located to my hands and I can't use a pen very well, so I type. Now that is being effected. Only one person (other than my agent and publisher) knows that I write 'bodice-rippers'. Those dreadful romance novels you want to throw across the room in sheer disgust after reading to the 3rd page. I started doing this as a way of making a little extra income when my child was young as I couldn't work full time. I'm so embarrassed about this, not even my closest friends nor my child knows. Too shame-making, really people! Now the RA is effecting my hands so badly, that source of income will be lost to me. There is NO WAY I could use a voice recording device. The cringe-factor is too extreme. No, no, I refuse to take any advice or accept any revelation to the effect that I do this. I'm only revealing the above on the strict understanding that I will remain anon' on here. Even if you guess who I am, I can still wield a mean broom-handle! Kill, maim, dismember! Remember this! I'm in my 50's and the CFS/ME began in 2000 after a viral infection from which I never really recovered. Then the FM hit me like a rock as well. CFS/ME and FM are co-morbid conditions. Initially all the GPs and Specialists of various kinds could tell me was what it was not, and then only after exhaustive (literally, for me) tests of all kinds. Blood work, X-rays, Ultra Sounds, MRI - you name it, I've gone through it. Finally the diagnosis of CFS/ME and FM was confirmed. I've tried everything since then, including Reiki, Acupuncture, seen a Herbal Medical Practitioner. Taken Chinese decoction of disgusting taste and even worse smell. Seen even more Specialists; again of all kinds, including Endocrinologists, Neurologists, Psychiatrists, Psychologists and specialists in women's medicine (who was the most outrageously expensive of the lot). Tried HGH and the universe knows what-all, to very little effect. The only real relief I've had is from Vitamin B12 shots weekly and various kinds of muscle relaxants and/or hypnotics. (continued ...)
• Fear of more hurt from relatives has paralyzed my thinking, and the following will describe why this fear still haunts me. It is also an example of the extent malice will direct actions. Some years ago I had a call from the Principal of my child's school - to the effect that two Policemen were at the school and wanted to talk to me. I hot-footed it to the school and was escorted into a room where two men introduced themselves as Detectives from the Child Pornography Investigation Unit. They were investigating a complaint that I was using my child for pornographic purposes and posting her photographs on the internet. I'm aftraid that my instant reaction was a shout of laughter but I sobered very quickly when I realized this was serious. My reaction did make a difference however and they soon realised this was a complaint of malice, especially after talking to my child, who's humilation and embarrassment was obviously extreme. They told me who had made the complain. It was a sibling! You can imagine the effect on my child and on me. They told me that the sibling could be charged with wasting Police time but I replied to the effect that if they did that, I and my child would be dragged into exactly the sort of attention that was being sought, and that neither of us needed to become victim to such malice. This has been my approach throughout some rather nasty stuff. Oscar Wilde's; "Never apologize, never explain!" .. has held me in good stead. : p My circumstances are such that I'm often forced to accept help with shopping, having medications and such like picked up for me, as well as other physical help. The person who does help is a relative and no matter how well-meaning, has no discretion at all. A loveable loon, and the best of people, but a loon nonetheless. (continued ...)
• In terms of concern over the "fraud issue". I'm told that Naltroxene is presently 'on the list' being considered for Govt' subsidy, and all I would be accepting is a 'pre-emption' of its eventual inclusion on that list. I would still have to accept the 'alcoholic' label for the present moment. I haven't asked yet, whether that can be changed but have an appointment with my GP for next Friday. In 7 days I will be an alcoholic! : D Yes, your wonderful and to-the-point comments have really made a huge difference. As Middleclasstool said; ".. fuck what anyone who gets off on lying about you thinks, blood ties or no." Meredithea's baby's "55" did the trick. Yes baby, ah has had enough and ah aint gonna take no more! xxxxx To Meredithea's baby. And to hell with the malice, mean spirited assholes. What they think is not going to stop me from getting at least some of my life back. "Fuck you, you bastards! Spin on that!" I've managed to cope with it all, and am doing okay. I'm not going to be anyone's victim. Adding this. Yes, I have a long history of medical support. Records to prove the nastiness to totally false. At worst twisted and cruel, at best, crude and stupid. I've wonderful Doctors, family and friends who love me as I love them. I suppose the issue is that, no matter how bad things have been, I can't stop loving even those who have behaved in ways that are beyond my ability to comprehend. The crux of the matter is - because of that, what they say and how they behave still has the power to hurt. It's a real pissoff, is that! ~wry smile~ Thank you all, you are the best. Without question!
• Simian XX, you shouldn't have any shame whatsoever about your "bodice rippers". If you've published a few books, that's a big effing achievement. I know many people who are immediately jealous. Anyway, if you want to dictate the next one, I'll type it up for you. I'll even phone you to transcribe the chapters. Be strong.
• Simian XX, I have to throw in an oar too and say feel proud of your accomplishments as a published writer. I see 'bodice rippers' as belonging to a certain class of guilty secret, we all have them--whether its a secret weakness for childhood comfort foods, silly video games, or, in my case, cheesy spy novels--the fact is you provide entertainment, escape and pleasure for a lot of people through your efforts, for which you should feel no shame!
• I can't really explain why, but it delights me to no end that you write bodice-rippers. I'm imagining you have a list tacked up by your computer of 85 different euphemisms for "erect penis." And if you ever come up short, I'm sure we'd all be happy to pitch in. :)
• Regarding fraud: doctors commit it all the time, and for good reason. Certain medications are highly effective in treating certain disorders and conditions, yet insurance companies and often our federal government refuse to approve of allowing them to be used for such purposes. A doctor of good conscience will prescribe the medication anyway, even if it involves some paper-trail augmentation. The question then is: do you trust your doctor?
• Nick, sounds like the weak point isn't the doc, but the "lovable loon" relative. Sim, can you make sure your pharmacy seals the drug and puts the chemical formula instead of the name on the label? Perhaps that would give you a break on privacy. Now, as for the bodice rippers... *clasps hands together, blushes prettily, flutters eyelashes "Why," she cooed, "How could you stoop so low?" Hell, sweetie, could be worse. It's not like you earn a living as a scum-sucking Republican politician. Let's have a sense of proportion here, please. God, if I could find a publisher, I'd be proud to write the damn things, and I'd laugh all the way to the bank
• I'm amazed and touched by everyone's support. So, for your next bout of nausea, here's a couple words on the 'bodice ripper' writing to give you that little extra heave. Penis words - Start at 'yoni' and work backwards. :D Phrase: "A frisson of shuddering heat left her damp and gasping, limp against his rigid manhood." I mean, you think I'm really likely to ask anyone else to write this shit for me? No way, not going to happen. But thanks for the offer anyway, Roryk. I'm going to hide under the bed now. ~cringes~
• In my twenties when I had nothing else to do, I was going to write formulaic bodice-rippers for a supplementary income. I think it's great!
• I've got everything you got,, and probably more,, stop dosing yourself on pharmaceuticals. It only leads to a more prolonged finale. "My concern is partly because certain family members have a history of spouting slanderous and/or libelous statements to the effect that I am both an alcoholic and illegal drug abuser." :) haha!! You transgendered,,and you are worried about that?? Instead, approach your problems from a different angle. The doctors only treat symptoms, not causes.You can chase it away,,but it will come right back. Ramblin’_Jack_Elliot_-_Arthritis_Blues.mp3 - DivShare Start eating oily fishes(not canned in vegetable oil), for your arthritis. Pay attention to what you are consuming. You is what you eat! btw,, I think you're living in the wrong state, which very often leads to anxiety in a persons life for fear of not being accepted, which in turn can aggravate medical and psychological issues. (forgive me if I'm out of league here,,I'm feeling the dog that bit me last night)
• Retank: I've got everything you got,, and probably more,, stop dosing yourself on pharmaceuticals. It only leads to a more prolonged finale. WTF?? Don't be a toad. The advice on diet is excellent, and Sim, you should be very careful with your diet and sleep requirements. I repeat, it doesn't hurt if you can afford some of the alternate therapy. But! let me tell you this, Retank, if diet did it for every person with XYZ problems, then pharm companies would be out of business. If it works for you, great, otherwise, it's not your place to tell Sim to quit the drugs. Transgender has nothing to do with this discussion. If Sim wants to bring that up, fine. This was not the issue under discussion. Sim: Start at 'yoni' and work backwards. inoy? Must be something I'm not familiar with. Phrase: "A frisson of shuddering heat left her damp and gasping, limp against his rigid manhood." We want more! Give us more rauncy, hot MonkeyLovin'! Especially when it involves dampness, gasping and rigidness. "He slowly drew back his hot, stiff male organ until she threw back her head and moaned, begging him to thrust himself deep, deep, deeper into her pink-petaled velvet softness until she screamed, writhing with lewd pleasure." This is fun. Next, anyone?
• SimianXX, I've got an entire shelf on my bookcase devoted to my favorite author of bodice-rippers, and if I were aware of a crippling medical condition that prevented her from writing any longer, I'd head straight out to buy the entire set again, just to support her financially in the only way I know how. Do you have an agent or publisher who might be sympathetic to your plight? Obviously no more books from you affects their bottom lines, too. So, they might have a vested interest in finding a way to keep you writing.
• MonkeyFilter: involves dampness, gasping and rigidness.
• Bluehorse,,I can apologize,, I've got a fused spine,,and CFS, with approaching end-stage liver disease, from Hep C, among other health related nasties. I do not troll around the web looking to create grief. Anyhow, please do not capitalize my name.
• Dang fishtick, missed that. Kthnxbye Retank retank, sorry. I have all these extra capitals here to get rid of. FishTick can have some. NickDanger needs one. I'd like to sprinkle a few on HillBillySwamp and MiddleClassTool. I'll try to remember the lower case arrrr, but if I forget, feel free to hit me with a Hammer! Not meaning to land on you with steel-toe boots on, am so cranky lately. And NO, it's not menopause.
• This is fun. Next, anyone? Bonus if you use words like "frisson" to class it up a bit.
• I have a guilty secret, and I'm about to share it with everyone. I LOVE reading bodice-rippers. I love curling up on the sofa on a lazy Saturday afternoon and reading one. Preferably with bon-bons handy. So there. Keep up the spirit, Anonomonkey!
• My goodness, if it wasn;t for bodice-rippers I'd have no sex life at all. Mind you, I'd have more intact bodices, but still...
• *monocle pop*
• Obviously no one here has the proper literary mindset to continue the the story of our pink-petaled lady. And so, like our hero, we must leave her sated on the couch occasionally closing her eyes as frissions of hot delight pulse through her memory.
• He took his cock out and waved it in her face.
• My favorite Laverne & Shirley episode was the one where Lenny and Squiggy were reading a romance novel looking for the naughty parts: Squiggy: And then he touched her in her secret place... Lenny: Where was that - the basement?
• "Can I touch you where you wee?" He said, whipping out a member like a coke can with a tennis ball balanced on top...
• "Wow, nice wang," she said. "I'd sure like you to stick that thing in my hoo-hoo, boy howdy."
• "Say lady", he leered, "wanna meet my little German friend? I call him Helmut Cheese."
• Simian: And you were worried about the stuff YOU wrote!! *shakes head I'm having a frission myself--of uncontrolled disgust.
• "Boy, I tell you what," she panted like a person who had just done a lot of exercise, "you know that thing I sometimes use to make poo-poo? Why don't you try making some sex in that?"
• "Sure honey," he replied, casually wiping on the curtains. "I've just about fully explored your lady garden by nows anyhoo."
• Talk about rearing your ugly head...
• Just then, the gardener, a burly man from the village, walked in. He wasn't wearing any pants because they were eaten by grubs. "Word on the street is that you need something ploughed," he said, "and all I need for that is a hoe."
• I HOPE YOU'RE TAKING NOTES SIMIAN XX. THIS STUFF IS PURE FRIED GOLD!!!! p.s. - feel better!
• "And then she felt a frisson of worry as she realized that the pounding of her heart was not an overwhelming flow of the tender emotion, but the insistent knock-knocking of the tip of Lord Hardwcke's towering pillar of masculinity against her lower vena cava." OK, I promise to go sit in the corner, work on my vermiposting lessons, and never again darken the door of romatic fiction again.
• Er, laughter IS the best medicine, right? And that includes snorts of derision?
• Strangely enough I think you actually raised the tone there somewhat, TUM, and not before time.
• Her passion-filled eyes betrayed her. He rose to go and she knew in her heart that she would let him do whatever he wanted. She boldly pulled the tablecloth off the antique Victorian dining table. The silverware clattered to the floor and he turned in surprise. She leaned back languorously against the cool wood, her sensual warmth enveloping the entire room. She threw the tablecloth playfully at him and it fell like a blanket on his head, covering him from head to toe. Startled he ran around the room bumping into things. She smiled. She took her time to slowly undress, lying back naked underneath the crystal chandelier. As the bright afternoon sunlight played over her willing body, she waited. And soon he bumped into her.
• That's the least bored story I've ever heard!
• hee hee
• Suddenly, the song ended. The radio announcer's voice was heard: "That was the new hit single, 'Over Her Willing Body' by Bright Afternoon Sunlight from their debut album 'SunlightWorld'. More hits after this!"
• Simian, I hope you realize we're not mocking. Just showing you why we need REAL bodice-ripper writers. These clowns couldn't rip their way out of a wet paper bag!
• Except maybe StoryBored
• Unless you're an anorexic trying to skip a meal don't do what I just did: substitute Conrad Black and Barbara Ameil into StoryBored's scenario.
• Good thing I don't wear a monocle, it would have cracked the screen...you naughty monkeys! That genre of novel is usually targeting a female audience, right? So, is there a male equivalent?
• Ol' One-Eye's wearing a monocle these days?
• Yeah... "Dear Forum You'll never believe what happened to me when I went to fix my sister-in-law's washing machine..."
• Now THAT really made me... laugh, TUM. *cough* Genre. I like saying that word. Genre.
• Revenge on the mean-spirited relatives: write them parts in the next series of books. It's not like they would confront you about it, should they happen to be readers.
• Oh, and this: "In the bath, she hardly dared wash herself. She was sore. It was all the frission from the previous night."
• Vaguely sort-of back on topic for a moment: I first started exhibiting symptoms of ME when I was 11 after a severe viral infection, and was finally given that diagnosis aged 19. I'm 33 now, and the silly disease has been the bane of my life, and more-or-less resistant to all treatment (though giant amounts - many 1000s of percent of RDA - of vitamin and mineral supplements did help since my body was incapable of storing any). However, about a year ago, after some inspired sleuthing by my husband around medical research on teh intarwebs, I am now starting to doubt the diagnosis and am feeling better than I've done for as long as I can remember. So, two questions for you Simian XX: first, do you have any skin problems? I was always told that I had eczema, that the ME 'triggered' and made worse -- turns out that I don't at all, what I had was a severe staphylococcal infection, that I'd been dragging round with me for who knows how many decades, combined with an off-the-scale allergy to staph A toxin that the infection released. Four months of hardcore horsepill antibiotic, and the 'eczema' has gone, as has the tiredness, the muscle pain, the general brainfuzziness and all the other stuff that led to the ME diagnosis. Second question: might you be clinically depressed? Having ME/CFS, not to mention your other ailments, is enough to inspire depression in anyone, but a number of the symptoms that I had at least were quite chicken and egg as to which came first. Talking to a therapist and/or antidepressants might be worth a look; it certainly made a huge difference to me. Just a couple of thoughts. In answer to your specific question - no hesitation, if the drug can make you feel better, take the drug. The hows and whys and wherefores of taking the drug are immaterial. And as for the bodice rippin', woooo! Go you! Proud to share a monkeyhouse with you. And finally, (sorry for long post), I second roryk, if there is anything at all that can be done to help, email is in the profile. We now return you to your regular scheduled innuendo entertainment :)
• "I touched her things and then she touched my thing. then we got it on. It was awesome."
• Good lord, Mothninja. That's great news. *lifts a negroni in celebration, remembers how bad they taste, surreptitiously dumps it in a potted plant*
• Jesus, mothninja, that's fantastic news. So happy you found an end to all that.
• God, I totally want to take care of Simian!! I am outraged that a sibling would cause such problems and drag your child into it to boot!! What is wrong with people. I am so sorry that you have had to suffer such outrageousness, especially while dealing with illness. I wish I could take all your pain away.... As for the bodice-ripping entertainment - my husband, of twelve years, and I got it on in the car, by the lake last night. It was seriously the stuff of fantasy. Would it be rude of me to say that my lips are swollen, I am sore and exhausted today. And quite happy.
• oooh! I love the dime-store lip-injection look, Darshon!! It always makes me feel extra sexy :D
• *stashes monocle in desk drawer for good* Ah, no, that anecdote, even while quite steamy as it is, must be rendered in the appropiate literary style. "The horse carriage, parked by the old pond, started rocking as if flung by the fury of a tempest..."
• He gazed deep, deep, deeply, into the limpid pools of her eyes, not daring to touch even her sleeve for fear of releasing the raging animal of lust inside himself. She slowly reached out to him as she simultaneously unbuttoned her blouse, turned out the light, and pushed the button on the stereo. The sweet words "Love is a many splendored thing" burst around them as he kicked the cat off the couch then buried his lips deep, deep, deeply into her bosom She sank deep, deep, deeply into the silken cushions reveling in his uncontrolled passions and gasping as the flaming frissions of delight moved over her skin. Eventually, he came up, gasping for air. Hey, I think I'm getting into this!
• Uh. It's that cat kicking what makes it for me. Damn.
• mothninja - what test did you finally have that revelaed the infection? And how did you get the doctor to do that test?
• A little background on CFS/ME.
• This is the neopolitan ice cream of threads.
• "Oh, baby," he sighed as she slowly unzipped her leopard-print catsuit. A great tumult broke out in the tighter regions of his trousers as glories undreamed-of were revealed by the movement. "Come to Mama," she cooed, as she pulled the zipper ever-so-slowly past her navel. "This is what you've been waiting for, isn't it?" He gasped as she reached out with her other hand and undid his belt buckle. "Are you ready for me?" she purred, licking her lips and stepping forward to stand near his engorging manhood, unzipping his fly to release it from confinement. "But I have something to tell you, first." Every hair on his body stood as erect as his now-straining member. The leopard print slid from her hips to the ground, and he felt her hot breath playing upon the tiny hairs within his ear. "HIPAA regulations regarding medical privacy are quite strict and binding. Anyone discussing your medical records, regardless of their job, could be subject to legal action in the event that they discuss your medical history in any form." She pulled away and smiled. "That's what you needed to hear, wasn't it?" she smiled mysteriously, reaching for the dish of Jell-O.
• Monkeyfilter: glories undreamed-of Ah, work-specific dirty talk, that can be... *cough*
• "Show us yer monkey!" he cried!!!
• "Yes," the crowd agreed, "show us yer monkey!"
• Whereupon Lady Fanny conducted the assembled guests into the orangery, where a small macacque dressed in the Duke of Salisbury's household livery sat upon an embroidered footstool delicately nibbling on a fresh teacake.
• "And there he is!" said Lady Fanny with a flourish of her riding crop. "Now, teacakes for all." The guests, indelicately aroused, vibrated with anticipated pleasure.
• They wanted to see her monkey and she serves teacakes? I suspect a mob uprising.
• Lady Fanny snatched the teacake from the drooling and disappointed macaque, and turning her back on the assembled guests, brought it slowly to her moist, Pussy Petal Pink pouting lips. She oh-so teasingly flicked it with her nasty pointed tongue before enveloping it completely in her mouth. The Duke stared and shifted in his masculine print wingback chair, attempting to hide his swelling Parliamentary member from the ladies standing stiffly among the foliage. He lifted his foot to place it gently on the footstool next to the monkey. His engorged gouty left big toe throbbed in unison with his cock. As Lady Fanny threw back her head and let her tinkling laughter spill through the room, the other, less beautiful, women in the room glared their contempt, knowing there was something dirty going on, but unable to see clearly. Bowing her head modestly Fanny lisped, "M'Lud, may I be excused from such an august company?" The old Duke growled his assent, and she curtsied deeply, leaving a moist spot on the carpet, before slipping gracefully from the room. As she left, she winked and took the macaque, shoving him deep into her bosom between her pert, fulsome breasts. The poor monkey gave a frisson of disgust before submitting to his fate. He thought, "Why couldn't she do this to the cat instead?" Sim: Anything you can use here? Feel free to use any plot line you may see developing.
• GRAN'MA IN FILTHY PURPLE PROSE SHOCKA! Film at 11.
• ,,and I apologize.
• *enters room, looks around Turn off the cameras, boys. I don't do films, just novels.
• what test did you finally have that revelaed the infection? And how did you get the doctor to do that test? There wasn't a specific test as such, it was more working on a hunch. I'm incredibly lucky that now, after decades of quacks, charlatans and downright bastards, I have The Greatest Doctor In The World. My genius husband did some intense googling and cross-referencing, and came up with the theory that I a) had staph and b) had a staph allergy (I'm allergic to lots of things, but was walking around with an IgE count of around 3500 (normal levels are around 10) even when no external allergens were present, so the thought was that I was producing my very own allergens! wheee!). I ran the idea past my doctor, who said, yep, that sounds highly plausible, good thinking -- and decided to try me on a month of heavy anti-staph antibiotics and antimicrobial creams and whatnot to see if it made any difference. The symptoms markedly improved, which indicated we were on the right track, and just continued the treatment till the symptoms went away. I'm sure I did have ME at some point, but because it is such a diffuse disease, I do wonder how many diagnoses are 'covering' some other underlying cause of at least some of the symptoms.
• So is DIMMN taking appointments?...
• Physician, war journalist, Internet guru, writer, Web designer... I want to marry him!
• I've had him. He's not all that. *jealous*
• Well, I thought Kitfisto was *spectacular*. It's actually a slightly more complicated diagnosis than that. Milady mothninja had both CFS-like symptoms, and some very uncomfortable eczema. Thing was, none of the specialists dealing with each of these things looked at the two in concert, nor checked back far enough. Moth had only had the eczema since she was 14 or so, two years after the CFS symptoms started. The eczema started on her top lip, then spread outwards. I found research that showed that a staph A infection could look just like eczema - and more than that, there's *no*such*thing* as Adult-onset eczema. You have it from birth or near to it, or you have something else. Soooo...I figured that the skin thing was a Staph A infection. The nose thing is important because Staph A is cleared from the body by antibiotics everywhere but the nasal cavity. (This is why surgeons wear masks. Your sinuses harbour stuff even when you've been drugged to oblivion.) Staph A decolonisation, as it's called, involves lots of antibiotics, and also an specific anti-bacterial nose gel thing, called Bactroban. All the previous treatments had left out the Bactroban, so they had only worked for a while, before the staph climbed down out of the nose and reinfected everywhere. Anyway, treating this properly fixed the skin. But I also found a lot of research about allegeric reactions to a thing called Staph A Exotoxin. There are a few papers linking Staph A Exotoxin allergy to, amongst other things, fatigue, brain-fog, depression, and feeling generally shit. All good old fashioned CFS symptoms. So, the theory I came up with was that the Staph A in moth's sinuses were dripping exotoxin into her throat and onto her skin. The skin droplets were causing atopic dermititis, which looks like eczema, and the throat stuff was causing a huge allergic reaction, leading to an IgE count of 3500, and the symptoms of CFS. Turns out I was right. Now, this is a test group of one, but I think there must be quite a large group of people out there with specific infections to which they are secondarily *allergic* - not reacting in a viral way, but reacting to a secreted toxin, or an otherwise normal by product of the bacteria or parasite. I'm not saying that CFS isn't a genuine condition. But I think it's a hugely "everything else" type label, and doctors need to take all symptoms someone has, no matter how apparently genetic (like, say, eczema) they are.
• Fine, fine, fine. But at what point did she rip open her bodice?
• Your sinuses harbour stuff even when you've been drugged to oblivion. MoFi Potsnorkers Local 413: We Could Have Saved Mothninja's Life Without All That Internet Crap.
• Snork dat pot Hork dat snot Get a little germ An' yer tonsils ro-ot...
• RTD, I really hope it was DIMMN that did the rippin' :D
• There are two ways this thread could go... Into the light... Into the dark... Stay tuned.
• Holy smoke DIMMN, that's some fine medical detective work!
• I don't get why DIMMN is getting so much praise when mothninja could just as easily been made right with the application of a couple of thirsty leeches.
• BURN THE WIZARD!
• I prefer my wizards medium-rare, akscherly.
• The 'bodice ripping' sells but despite what anyone may think, most writers don't make a lot of $$'s. Agent fees, publishers percentages and so on eat up a lot. Mostly it works out as an average income. With all the talent here, why not get together and write a Monkey Filter bodice ripper with everyone contributing a chapter. You never know, it might be a huge best seller and make Monkey Filter some $$'s. Don't forget, you do need a plot. : D
• Choose-Your-Own-Adventure porn!
• So, the theory I came up with was that the Staph A in moth's sinuses were dripping exotoxin into her throat and onto her skin. The skin droplets were causing atopic dermititis, which looks like eczema, and the throat stuff was causing a huge allergic reaction, leading to an IgE count of 3500, and the symptoms of CFS. Ok, I'm pretty sure DIMMN is Batman.
• You don't know the half of it, dude.
• This has got to be the strangest thread ever. Medical discussion and bad romance novel passages!
• And Batman!
• Hmmmm, a plot, you say? Can we rip one off (no pun intended)? Can we rewrite "Hamlet" in the style of a bodice-ripper, changing all the names and places? (And adding a happy ending where Hamlet lives and Ophelia's not really crazy, of course)
• Hamlet dies?!?!?!?! Thanks for the spoiler warning!
• ...and Ophelia's not really crazy, of course Are you kidding? Consider the untapped pr0n market that is the sex-with-the-mentally-insane fetish! What could be hotter or more lucrative than that?
• I have several seemingly unrelated health problems, I yearn for Gothic romance and debauchery, and I can never finish a Shakespeare play. Is this the right thread for me?
• Nope, you want Daisy_May.
• I believe there is some sort of wiki around here that might serve as a bodice-ripping venue?
• We have a wiki?
• Yep. Right next to the preview button.
• pree..view...but...ton? Speak English, woman!
• Hamlet? Hmm. The only women in it, really, are Gertrude and Ophelia. If you want a Shakespeare tragedy, King Lear might be a possibility since there are 3 daughters for variety. And, Hamlet seems too anxiety ridden to be a real stud. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, meh. So do we go with the ghost? Certainly not Polonious. You probably need to get into novels, not plays. so "Jane Eyre" and "Madam Bovery" come to mind, though I think the best be would be almost anything by Ayn Rand.
• I recommend any Nancy Drew mystery, as I have been waiting to rip open that sultry sleuth's leotard for almost 40 years.
• Ophelia and Gertrude are getting it on. That's why Hamlet is a little... shall we say... distant.
• Uh, Nancy Drew is a dude, Ralph. "Nancy" is a descriptor, not a name.
• But the "whore ratio" is so high! *runs off giggling, dives under blankets with Danish butter cookies*
• Best joke it ever took me three hours to get, TUM.
• Three and a half for the Danish butter cookies part. Jesus. Someone get this baby out of me NOW kthxbye.
• I'm just returning to this thread after moving and not having the internet at home for over a week... oh, the withdrawal pains! Go, Anonymonkey! Don't be ashamed of your writing if you can help it -- I teach at a University, and am a published scary feminist lady, and I read a good bodice-ripper when I need to relax :)
• You don't scare me. Give us a kiss, sugar-tits!
• Heh. *smooch* I'd give you a smack in the face, but you'd like it too much *waggles eyebrows*
• ZOMG! I'm in luuurve! *swoons*
• Another successful conquest! *evil laugh* Oh, wait, did I say that out loud?
• I just love an evil laugh on a woman. *bridles*
• An update on the Naltrexone. For all those who have been supportive and interested. IT WORKS! Also, for those who have been concerned about legalities, the following will also be very positive ...... Instead of having to purchase the usual prescription, we were able to arrange a small prescription of 10 tablets. End cost (and without having to resort to prevarication), for three months supply is $30. The amount I've been spending on pain medication, and other stuff to help boost energy etc., far exceeded $10 per month. We found a Compounding Pharmacist who was able to split 50ml tablets down to the 4 mls daily dose - known to be effective. After only a few days, pain was only mild discomfort. After nearly 3 weeks at 4mls daily, I have no pain! I have energy. I have leaping about like a wilderbeast in mating season. I have amazement and disbelief. My face aches from huge smile I'm wearing almost all the time. I rush around and clean things - fast - because I can. You can imagine how I'm feeling. Yes! As high as a kite and still rising. [continued]
• Add this. In my 30's I was diagnosed with Adult ADHD. Very hyperactive. Very focused on creative things, hopelessly impractical and inattentive in most other areas. When the CFS/ME and FM hit, the impact was even greater because I was so accustomed to having that abundant energy, despite the R.A. In fact, the ADHD had always helped me to overcome pain and stiffness associated with R.A. Problems associated with practicalities and short-term memory drove me toward the process of ADHD diagnosis. What you can 'get away with' at 20, is a hassle in your 30's. The ADHD medication allowed me to 'prioritize' my attention. I'm noticing a return of that hyper-energy and former (almost obsessive) focus on my creative work, and I'm gabbling away to all who halt near me for more than 20 seconds. My tongue is again running independently of any connection to pre-frontal cortex. My brain works at speeds above neutral, and I remember all those appalling jokes that made all my friends shudder in horror at the words, "I have a joke for you!" [continued]
• The hyper-energy will now be a greater 'gift' because, without pain, I will probably be unstoppable. My offspring is appalled. Screams of : "OH NOES! NOT HYPER MOM AGAIN!" followed by a slamming of doors and a hiding in the closets. Oh _ My _ Glods_! Would never have believed it. If it's a 'placebo effect' - then all hail the placebo. Most definitely, it is not placebo. It does work. For those of you who suffer the horrors of R. Arthritis and A.S., get the stuff as fast as you can. For those who also have CFS/ME and FM. Grab it and run, you'll have the energy to do so. Again I thank all who gave me so much support, confidence and intelligent advice. Tomorrow I begin landscaping the garden. :D [end]
• congratulations!!
• Wow. That's amazing, and I'm so glad for you, Anonomonkey! I have a friend who suffers from Fibromyalgia and RA, and I'm going to pass this along ASAP.
• That's the best news I've had all week, Double-X!
• Goddamn, Simian XX. You just made me day, seriously. So happy for you.
• Great news! Congratulations.
• From me too. That's so great to hear. And if you run out of things to do around your house, we've got this great new project guaranteed to keep you up all night...
• That's great to hear.
• MonkeyFilter: leaping about like a wilderbeast in mating season *backs away slowly, not so sure this is entirely a gooooood thing
• Well done you. My car really needs washing, if your bored. Good on ya!