June 07, 2005

• What that chick is wearing at the top of the site: NOT HIP. IMO.
• This is a joke, right? This has GOT to be a joke. Please, tell me this is a joke site.
• even better: "I longed for a kit that I could unpack at home to provide me with insta-hip. An article of clothing, a CD, an accessory, a food or drink. Dissolve in water and - Presto - Hip Monkeys." didn't we have a thread about this?
• by definition, anyone who goes to a web site called "wanna be hip" for advice on how to be hip is barred for life from being hip.
• I'll just keep doing my own thing, thank you. I figure that if I make a 'mistake', I should just repeat it, and soon enough it'll be a mark of my own personal style. Same as how jazz works. This is how I've been wearing Converse for the last twenty years straight. Hip in high school, then a long, lean period of searching through vintage stores to find them, and now every damn greasy-haired Slim Jim hipster is wearing them again. Fuckers.
• someone has misunderstood the concept of "hip"... looks like a link farm to me......
• I'm still convinced it's hip to be square...
• that's what struck me about this site. being "hip" is such an ephemeral notion. i did a story once about marketing to college kids, and how it's virtually impossible because once something is defined by the mainstream as "hip," it's hopelessly outdated to actual hip persons. but, yeah, as far as i know, this is an actual site. that exists, most probably, to sell you hip items. or, should i say, items that they deem hip.
• And Saketinis and already demode. Old Fashioneds for the men, Side Cars for the ladies.
• Daddy: 54, staunch closeted-republican, CEO of design firm he launched 20 years ago, likes to drink cheap chic wines by the case, has a hard time expressing himself. Daugther: 13, constrained rebel who likes to dye her hair varying shades of pink and black, listens to re-issued The Damned CDs (not to mention DVDs on daddy's home theater plasma screen), jams out on expensive (but actually cheap) electric guitar that daddy purchased for her online. Son: 9, troubled by the "McCally Calukin look-alike" comments, mind lost in electronica that daddy surrounds him with, likes to secretly terrorize his pet cat, has a speech impediment. Mommy: 47, likes to knit alpaca socks, has capers in olive oil for lunch, spends the evenings working on the family schedule for the following year, and during breif satisfying moments - pleasures herself while reading wannabehip.com.
• wannabesexy.com is for sale... wannabebeautiful.com is up and running wannaberich.com is up, and sucks but.. www.wannabesidedish.com does not seem to be taken... :)
• It's a little sad to be past high-school-age and still thinking about whether or not you're 'hip'... Also, is the word 'hip' still hip? It sounds a little dated.
• Hey, Lacoste shirts are hip again! Apparently mama's advice was right: don't throw it away because it will come back around in 20 years. I vote with the good Captain: have a personal style and tell these "hip" people to kiss off if they don't like it.
• I saw someone today at my work (an office building mind you) wearing ripped jeans, flip-flops, and a "retro" Mr. Bubble shirt. I couldn't help remembering when I used to wear "vintage" shirts that were, sadly, way unhip. But that wasn't to work either...
• Linked to on the site: Under Armour. Wow, it looks like future clothing! Unfortunately in the real future people are fat.
• It's not having what you want; It's wanting what you've got.
• A Third for the other Captain. Oh yeah, and cufflinks. Seriously.
• all you younger monkeys, beware: at some point you'll hit that depressing phase when you turn on a car radio and think, what is this music? who is this group? and why don't i know the lyrics anymore? kind of a rite of passage i guess.
• Apparently the hip have co-opted the term "wanna-be". hmmm...
• whatever you do, do NOT click on wannabecool.com do NOT say I didn't warn you...
• and why don't i know the lyrics anymore? Because it's all crap and I only listen to my ipod and occasionally news radio. And a banana to SMT for the lovely imagery.
• Damn you, HB! Those were NOT sweet moves!
• God -- it's stuck in my head! Make it stop!
• I have communed with the spirit of John Lee and the word is "This ain't hip, pretty monkeys"
• Skin is the new Spandex. . .
• Manners are hip? Who"s writing this thing, my Aunt Delores?
• Monkeyfilter: Who's writing this thing, my Aunt Delores?
• Pardon me, but would you mind very much to back that thang up?
• It's hip if they feel hip. hey, in some circles comic book t-shirts and ripped jeans is hip. In others, apparently wearing nasty unflattering makeup is. So glad my highschool was the former.
• how it's virtually impossible because once something is defined by the mainstream as "hip," it's hopelessly outdated to actual hip persons. so so true. and if you live in new york, the cycle is even more impossible - by the time it's referenced in print (in anything less hip than maybe Paper magazine - though of course, by now Paper is probably no longer hip...) or anyone in connecticut has heard of it, it is ovah. That's why it's a waste to even bother pretending to be hip. Just be cool instead.
• I was hip for a while. Unfortunately, I was asleep at the time.
• Costa Rica! It's the new New Zealand! But if you're too cool for that, Guatemala! It's the new Costa Rica! Which makes it the new new New Zealand! Or the new new new Zealand, for that matter! OMFG!!!! I just choked on my Appletini! Personally, I can't wait for it to be hip to not show your hips. Every day I see kids wearing shirts and pants that ride too high and too low, respectively. On a supermodel, it might work. On the average person, it makes them look like they have a fat ass and a beer gut, even when they don't. (When they really do, it's just horrifying!) See, it's not that I'm old or that I'm a prude, I just don't like seeing people wear "provocative" clothes and then spend the rest of the day tugging the shirt down to cover the protruding skin. If you have to constantly tug on it to feel comfortable, it doesn't fit you! I mean, damn. And those hairstyles? Seriously, that shaggy mop style died in 1979 for a reason, you pseudo-retro freak! On the other hand, maybe I'm just old... But I do know what's hip, people. Mothafuckin' MoFi T-shirt. That's hip.
• Yay! I wanna show my individualism by having a life just like everyone else! Wait ... uh ... Yay! I wanna show my individualism by having a life just like everyone else!
• They can have my tights when they pry them from my dead, cold legs.
• "They can have my tights when they pry them from my dead, cold legs." There ain't nobody gonna volunteer for that job! (and few of us even wanted the mental image!)
• Cambodia is the new Costa Rica. "So you been to school For a year or two And you know you’ve seen it all In daddy’s car Thinkin’ you’ll go far Back east your type don’t crawl Play ethnicky jazz To parade your snazz On your five grand stereo Braggin’ that you know How the niggers feel cold And the slums got so much soul" (Her music is hilarious. "It's like a hip Harry Connick jr." THERE IS NO HIP HARRY CONNICK JUNIOR!) You know what the secret to "being hip" is? Looking for things that you genuinely enjoy, and continuing to look for more after you've found some.
• There ain't nobody gonna volunteer for that job! (and few of us even wanted the mental image!) Who were the "few?" Eeeew!
• ooooooo, Maryh and Sidedish put together today's hippest tagline! Right On, gurlz. Oh yeah, baby. I'm so substantial hip. When I got dressed this morning, I looked in the mirror and it was so major fabtabulous, baby. Turned to the right: tremendous! Hip Turned to the left: substantial! Hip Turned around: immense! Butt *goes back to the closet for something less hip.
• Hey, BlueHorse :) *Lunch, meet keyboard. Keyboard, meet lunch.*
• The hippest thing of all is being yourself. [piano music, rainbow-colored star flys by followed by the words "The More You Know"] [NBC program resumes]
• drj bwhaaaaaa!
• After some thought, I've changed my opinion on this site. The site isn't there for scenesters, to keep track of the latest trend. They aren't trying to turn people into the pinnacle of hip, either. It's just there to help someone become more hip than they started. Anyone who looks for a site like this could probably use it. If nothing else, it's an authority for girls to appeal to when as they try to convince there boyfriend to quit wearing his pants down to his knees. That alone makes the site worth while.
• (their boyfriend) (I hate making that mistake)
• "their boyfriends..." Just helping.
• heh. I hate that one too, now.
• and of course we all know what mr. knickerbocker finds hip!
• I am wanting very much a hip. Please help to load the website. thanks be to you.
• ok, the majority of crap on that hip list is at least 3 years out of date..... the rest? 5 to 10 years.
• AH!!! sexyrobot. the epitome of hipness if ever there was a hipster. please tell me what is hip! admin, hope me be hip!
• I'd wear those.
• I'd wear those. Talk about unwanted mental images. Ew. at some point you'll hit that depressing phase when you turn on a car radio and think, what is this music? who is this group? and why don't i know the lyrics anymore? Worse than that, is wandering on the hypermegasupermarket or mall, and realizing you're humming to the muzak version of some old favorite. Sigh.
• I said steam, steam, a hundred bad dreams Goin' up to Harlem with a pistol in his jeans A fifty dollar bill inside a paladin's hat And nobody's sure where Mr. Knickerbocker's at...
• And back to the origin of this all... SideDish -- Don't stop wearing hosiery. I am sure that there are plenty of people like myself who very much prefer hosiery on women.
• Okay, fine -- it's a fetish. Is everyone happy now?
• Right on mct. That's where I got the handle from.
• And should we know just what ELSE you prefer, Mr. Bernockle? fishnet or regular?
• Plaid Bermuda shorts!? Just another reason to be glad not to live in America.
• More paraphrased excerpts (from the mukluk page) Mukluks take us back to our trapper roots! (What the hell does that mean?) Gwynneth Paltrow and Kate Moss love mukluks, they look so good on their bony legs! (Um... can we dispense with the "bony" and go back to the "fit" please? Seriously. Anorexic isn't sexy. Or hip.) And look for moon boots to come back in your stores, thanks to Napoleon Dynamite! (Oh, great. Take the least-functional cold weather gear ever made and revive it for fashion. As a Boy Scout I clearly recall being told that showing up for the winter camp-out in moon boots would be a ticket straight back home, because the second they hit snow they soaked it up, and wet feet in below zero weather is a recipe for lost toes.)
• BlueHorse -- I am going to refrain from answering my preference question for fear of losing whatever credibility I have built up here over time. Fuck it. I don't have any credibility here. Regular. The more sheer, the better.
• While standing on the subway platform this morning, I saw the most interesting hosiery being worn on a young Japanse woman. I had to do several double-takes before realizing that she was indeed wearing some unusual form of stockings. They were completely invisible except for one detail - microscopic lines that spiraled around her legs. It gave a really bizarre look! It was as if she had laid down on some surface with ribbed edges, and it left imprints on her skin. You know, what happens if you fall asleep with your head on, say a corduroy pillow for example... Made you want to reach out and touch them! How's that for temptation bernockle?! I stood in awe for a minute, and said to myself "She is damn hip!"
• I just came.
• I just came a little.
• Capt. Renault may not be hip, but he sure is classic.
• Relax, sugarmilktea: it was just cellulite. Googling for spiral stockings I came (oh, damn) across these ones. Making me dizzy, in so many levels...
• Flagpole, imagine globules of bagle mixed with coffee and a dallop of olive cream cheese landing on a lcd monitor. Bwhaaa! I do admire your googlexterity, you are so very close but not quite there. The spirals were parallel, evenly spiraling in thick swashes from top-to-bottom (or if you prefer, bottom-to-top). I may be tempted to ask her myself next time I catch her sporting those whimsical curiosities. She's usually at the platform like clockwork everyday...
• Why I'm doing this? I don't know. Damn you, sugarmilktea...
• First you had to go and disturb my breakfast, now you sucessfully disrupted my lunch! Damn you, Flagpole... You are getting closer with the first link. However, the ones on this girl were more subtle; fewer spirals, and the spirals were not as tight. Imagine 3 or 4 loose spirals on a completely invisible stocking. Damn, now you've got me searching...
• Flagpole, since I gave you a fright with my creepy stories in the deja vu thread, figured I would provide you with an update to the spiral-stocking lady to allay your fears... Even though it was a cold crisp morning today, there she stood wearing a charcoal-colored miniskirt with charcoal-colored stockings. Sheer again, yes, but now she was sporting diamond patterns, rather than spiral. Seems to be frequent now, so I'm guessing spring/summer = sprials and fall/winter = diamonds?? She is still hip!!
• I refuse to believe "Fuzzy Mukluks" are hip.