April 11, 2005

• I really doubt it. They ask for ID at the gate now.
• Is this person somewhere else, or will they be flying with you? If they're someone else, they can send you the money for the ticket and you can respond in kind with a receipt of the ticket purchase (with the appropriate information blacked out). Of course, for this to even be an option, there has to be an element of trust between the parties, and if there were, I doubt you'd need to be asking this question. The only other good option I can think of is to do some research and locate a travel wiaver for them to purchase. Travel waivers are given out to passengers occasionally if their flight was horribly delayed/misrouted etc. Additionally, sometimes these can be purchased with frequent flyer miles. I know of some people who fly a lot for business, but rarely ever for pleasure, so they tell me that they can (and have) converted miles into travel waivers (which are typically transeferrable, YMMV, a key point to check) and sold the waivers for money. I see travel waivers offered for sale on craigslist, newspaper classified ads, and ebay. I believe that travel voucher and travel waiver are synonymous in this case. YMMV
• I think the only airline you could finagle this with is Southwest Airlines (which historically is extremely lenient with ticket policies), but I wouldn't be surprised if 9/11 changed all that.
• I'll tell you if you take this package with you and give it to my friend at the gate in Cairo.
• Unless you buy it yourself, I'd say your chances of getting a reasonably anonymous ticket is close to 0. They'll have to fork over the dough for you, OR you'll have to trust them to reimburse you. Perhaps for situations like this you can create some sort of escrow account where the movement of money is asynchronous. You'd have to pay at first yourself, but then after all is done you can get reimbursed out of the escrow account.
• moneyjane, if you are flying within Canada, you might be okay. Might be.
• sketchy
• Charter service, maybe. Probably cost one whale of a lot more than a regular ticket, but if it's someone who really wants your services...
• mj - the US is trouncing other countries for not following security procedures strictly enough, so I'm not sure that Canada will look the other way. (And, the one time I flew into and out of Canada in the mid 1980s, they appeared to already be at Code Orange - their metal detectors were set so that the aluminum screws in my ankle set them off, somethng that's not happened in US or European airports after 9/11.) But, maybe, if you flew to, I dunno, Sierra Leone first, then bribed someone to let you go to your next destination under another name? Might be easier to change your name after you booked the ticket.
• Get a portion of the money up front. Get it all if you can. Buy the ticket yourself. You are negotiating from a positiion of strength. You should be able to get that.
• I think what I'll do is ask for a $1000 deposit, and purchase a round trip ticket to Toronto. When I get there, he'll have to reimburse me the value of the ticket and give me the rest of my fee. I think it's reasonable; the gig's $3000, so it's basically a 30% deposit. That way, if, say the guy just never turns up when I arrive, I'll have a ticket home if nothing else. He's risking sending a stranger $1000; I'm risking spending that $1000 and then not receiving the other $2000 when I get there. What do you think? Also...how much leeway is there with passport photos? I know Canadian ones are good for five years, during which time a person could theoretically gain/lose weight, and change hair colour or length or style. I would imagine officials are trained to look more at underlying facial structure to determine if you are who's pictured on your passport; more, say, than your average person?
• it's basically a 30% deposit. Sounds fair.
• As to the leeway, my passport photo shows me when I was 50 pounds heavier, and I had no issues entering/departing the US a couple of years back. The only person to comment was actually the immigration chickie coming back into Australia. So - what're we talking about here? Were you originally a man, mj? ;)
• That is exactly what I think you should do. Not that I would ever contemplate such an arrangement...
• you are flying within Canada, you might be okay Unfortunately this is definitely not true. Your real name must be on the ticket to use it in Canada. I got burned on this once myself, and that was before security got tightened up.
• Oh, and tickets from Vancouver to Toronto are cheaper than $1000 (unless you travel business class) so even if he doesn't turn up you still make some money...
• Actually, I was originally men; conjoined twins and all...but then...the shark incident. What I'm trying to figure out is a reliable method of being able to not reveal my real name, yet still travel with a passport as id. This is what I've come up with. Get a passport photo taken with my features slightly altered - cheeks a little fuller, different hair colour and length, and do my makeup in such a way as to make me look quite different - but only to an average joe, not anyone official. So, say, maybe the person in the passport could be a close relative, a cousin, maybe; and maybe I just happen to be using her passport, meaning that to clients, that's not my id, and so the information on it is meaningless. At the same time, the people to whom it is important that I am who I say I am will have no problem knowing it's me. This isn't going to work with a client really scrutinizing the photo - but that would be unusual behaviour; people want to accept things you tell them unless there's a compelling reason not to. Also, people don't like to be caught out, and a client thinking there's even a chance that, using my passport info, he's going to contact the completely wrong person should be a strong deterrent. I know this all sounds a bit cloak-and-daggerish, but if it's easy to do and would probably work, I might as well do it :)
• Sounds highly illegal...
• Well, I will say that while I was in Europe, I met a woman from the US who was traveling on her younger sister's passport in order to get the various under-26 discounts. But she was Asian and I wondered if that helped her get away with it, cashing in on the "we all look alike" stereotype and all that. However, I thought it was a stupid idea then and I still think it's a stupid idea. All you need is for one overzealous agent to decide that's not you in the picture.
• Hrrm. Why the need to obscure your passport information? If you're flying independently anyway, why not just pop it into a secure locker? Or, for that matter, give it to the front desk at the hotel to put into their safe. I'm sure it happens all the time.... This would, of course, take all the fun out of things. So you might want to stash a couple of kg's of coke, 1 million dollars in bearer bonds and a Walther PPK into their safe at the same time. Just for the look of things, you understand. I am not the secret agent you are looking for.
• Why do you need to show this person your passport? If I were you I'd stick it in a safety deposit box when you get to TO and use another way to identify yourself to your contact (ie. by means of a code word or somesuch).
• *sidles up to Dreadnought* The rain in Spain falls mainly on small aboreal animals.. *whistles nonchalantly*
• Safety deposit boxes in hotel rooms are accessible by the person in who's name the room is in, and as far as the front desk safe; I'm trying to be as discreet as possible in the city they probably live in, and front desk's going to want to know which guest I'm staying with. It would be much better if I didn't have to worry about the passport at all because the client thinks it's not even mine.
• The choices in keeping my name from people who are buying tickets and/or may snoop around are; 1. Go to great lengths to hide it which will cost me the business of those who are leery of sending cash and want to buy the tickets themselves. 2. Get false id. 3. Make the information useless. I'm digging 3. It's the ol' hide in plain sight dodge. Clients always want to know your real name. I'll think of one, common as dirt, one that, obviously, is not the one on the passport.
• nah, nah... get a safety deposit box at a bank. You put the passport and whatever else you want in the box, and they give you a little metal key. You have the key with you, there's no way they can identify the safety deposit box. When you leave your contact you go back to the bank, pick up your documents and go back to the airport. It's much, much simpler than making a new identity.
• Most places want you to open another account in addition to having a safety deposit box with them; also, the client doesn't want you wandering around opening bank accounts - they're paying a lot of money for your undivided attention. As well that doesn't help with plane tickets. I like number 3 because it's not me creating a new id in any legal sense - it's me making the client think the information is completely useless because the photograph appears as though it could be someone else to someone not specially trained in scrutinizing ids, and at some point I've casually mentioned it's 'not me'. All I really need to do is plant enough doubt in the mind of any potential goofball that they'll never try to use the information.
• moneyjane, I worry about your safety. I imagine you have done this before, what kind of safeguards do you have in place in case you are late in coming back (for whatever, hopefully silly, reason)? What do you do? If you don't use your own identity and, God forbid, something happens, then what? How can anyone help you? All I am saying is.....be careful. Come home safe and sound. *sorry to play mom*
• It actually is my real identity I'm using - I'm just fooling the client into thinking it's not mine - so I'm covered for anything official, and I'm not risking any kind of a fraud charge. My bud has my back - I make a point of phoning him and telling him exactly where I am, right in front of the client, and I also phone him at specific times each day I'm away...what I *really* want is a gps personal locator, but the technology hasn't quite got there - I want one that looks like a watch, and that you can't remove. They have clunky ones for kids, but it's got to be something I can wear to the places I go. Also, the monitoring network has to cover your area, and I want North America wide. I figure what I need will be available in the next 12-18 months. In the meantime, maybe I'll just get a largr black watch that could be faked as one. I tell ya, it's all in what people think you have. BTW...anyone know what you might want to attach to such a watch to make it look electronically live? A tiny indicator light or some damn thing?
• Another small black plastic thing on the band next to the watch.
• Beautiful. Simple is best. A small black plastic thing with an LED would be supercool. I bet I can make something that looks pretty cool.
• Don't they have blinky LED jewelery at cheesey gift shops? Get something that looks abou the same size and glue it to your Swatch. And be careful girl.
• Squid! Body lights! There is a reason for ravers to exist! Now I wonder if the guy's even going to come through on this deal...he asked me to call him tonight to go over details, then wasn't anwering his cell, so I left a message for him to leave me a message about when to call tomorrow...which he hasn't done. Oh well. Kind of like fishing - but what's cool is figuring out all this stuff sort of as a test run.
• Just a tip -- don't ever entertain a client who's kinda quiet, has spooky glasses that shine in the dark, a huge cross around his neck that he likes to finger, and a jersey with a zig-zag pattern. In fact, if you ever meet someone like this, RUN!
• In fact, if you ever meet someone like this, RUN! no - running's the wrong idea. handcuff yourself to him and beat the snot out of him. hacksaw optional.
• Even the hiding in plain sight thing sounds risky to me. I know you're going to go to great lengths to make it LOOK like an assumed identity, but you may also find that one of your clients doesn't pick up on the double-whammy and just assume that you're telling them your real name. Not that that'll be the 100% outcome, but I'm certain that reverse psychology won't trap everyone. And it's just those sorts of people who will probably google your non-"assumed" name (either believing you've used it a lot and can be found by it, or by believing that it is your real name). Either way, your cover would be effectively blown. Though I can't think of it, I'm sure there's an even better idea. If you know any others in your line of work in the area, perhaps you could ask them what they do in this situation.
• Hey Moneyjane, good luck with the attempt. derail: Do you ever meet other monkeys? You are one of my 2 favorite monkeys and I am going to Vancouver for this conference and I'd love to meet you. I also sent you an email to your blog-provided Gmail, as regards this request Vancouver-things-to-do-suggestions.
• Holy shit, a delurker! What's news, Rats?
• Be sure to keep your identity a secret. No one needs to know that your real name is: Priscilla Jane Swenson 1422 Lattimore Drive Vancouver, British Columbia V5R 5L8, Canada
• Fuck! Fuck! Didn't mean to hit post! Please delete! Please delete!
• That's a pretty long name, Ms. Priscilla Canada! With numbers even!
• This might have been mentioned earlier, but could you find a friendly travel agent who could take their credit card information and use said credit to purchase you a ticket. In otherwords, your client would in effect transfer funds to your travel agent, would would then act as the purchaser of your ticket. That way the agent acts as a buffer. You would still be identified on the ticket, but if you don't tell your client which airline or flight you are on, and you just show up to your destination hotel on your own, he/she will never need to know who you are. Check with a couple of travel agents. I'm pretty sure that they would do this.
• ewwwwwwwww wtf. get a private /msg, you two. or take it to email. and lol @ bernockle.
• There are some not-that-expensive, geeky Casio watches with real GPS units built-in. Chunky, scary looking, they might be just what you need. Or not. Oh sheez. GPS, ID spoofing, crossing international lines... hope everything goes OK, mj. BTW, you're not fooling us. You're really trying to vanish from the grid, go blank before the upcoming collapse of western economy and society, aren't you..? : )
• Not a lot, quidnunc. No response from jane yet :(
• and no, wedge, I'm not kidding, is there something wrong with wanting to meet a very cool poster? Please explain what's wrong with what I posted?
• ...geeky Casio watches with real GPS units built-in Ah yes...but those only tell me where I am; I want it to tell other people where I am. Like a transmitter rather than receiver of location. Basically Lo-Jack for people. chimaera I've googled my real name and it pretty much dead ends, as there are, thankfully, loads of other people with the name. I'm also invisible as far as the phone system as well - unlisted. This is all a work-in-progress; I will not be seizing control of North America with my unbeatable army of robot ninja flying squirrels from the Earth's Core until June, so all super-stealth suggestions will be gratefully accepted until you notice the Ottawa, D.C., and Mexico City in flaming ruins, and muffled mechanical chittering beneath your home. Do not be alarmed! All monkeys will be spared, providing they have paid my $10,000 registration and processing fee.
• Pleased to not be alarmed. We're sure you know how to take care of yourself, but us monkeys feel compelled to try to look out for each other. As for the registration fee, is that CDN$10k or US$10k?
• Well said, our chimaera!
• moneyjane, not that I know much about being clandestine, but here's an idea: why in the world do you need to keep your passport with you? In your destination city, look for a Mail Boxes Etc or similar type place. Call them and set up a box rental. These places will accept deliveries on your behalf. The day you fly out of town, take a preaddressed, prepaid overnight envelope with you in your carryon luggage. Arrive at the airport, go through customs, and then find the nearest drop box. Pop your passport (and your plane tickets?) into the overnight delivery envelope and drop it off in the box. The next morning, take a cab to the Mailboxes Etc on your way to the airport, and pick up your delivery.
• Wait, what's the need for a passport? Aren't you Canadian? You should only need a passport if your crossing int'l borders.
• Mr. K, you still need some form of ID to fly.
• strike my previous comment from the records! i mistakenly assumed rats was a dirty old man looking to score teh sex0rz, but she assured me her intentions are less narfarious. my bad. further, should any ladies require my -- ahem -- services, i shall note that my rates are quite reasonable! and your satisfaction is guaranteed!
• I thought that some of the high end cell phones could trace where you were? Can you check with your cellular service provider and see if that's a possiblility?
• I have a close friend who is in a similar business for herself. Before she agrees to meet anyone, she passes their info to me. I basically do a background check - see if any red flags pop up that would hint at someone to be wary of. She also goes to great lengths to conceal her identity [I'm one of few people that know her true name]. Additionally, she always "researches" the entire scenario before committing. One thing that she continues to impress me with is her refusal to allow a client to be in control of the situation. There is no way in hell she would allow a client even glimpse at her true ID. Guess I'm confused by your effort to come up with this passport that is really you, but you want the client to believe that the information is completely useless. If a client is willing to lay down $3000 on this deal, it seems to me that you are the one calling the shots? If the client insits on "knowing" your true identity, why not just have a fake reserve ID for client-use, and your true ID for flight purposes? As far as the purchase of the actual ticket, you could always have the client Western Union a deposit to cover the airfare. Find a friend/co-worker/acquaintance that would be willing to pick up the funds for you (i.e., the client would transfer funds to a name not your own). You then purchase the ticket yourself and the client has no clue your "true" identity... just my thoughts... Best of luck to you and keep safe!
• What sugarmilktea said.
• a fake reserve ID for client-use, and your true ID for flight purposes? That is a great idea. I was trying to figure out how the hell to not have any fake id that anyone official would ever see. I have to use a passport as id to go out of the country, and it's the one everyone seems to like the best in-country, which is why I want to use it for official id purposes and airline tickets. And I think that I probably *should* be getting a deposit anyway if I travel anywhere, so if they don't want to ante up, fuck 'em. Then I buy my own damn tickets. I'll turn my attention to finding a hidey place in my luggage for my passport. If anyone goes digging around for my id, they'll find the fake one first and think they got it. Yay! A simpler solution that doesn't depend on me psyching somebody out or a lot of running around. And Mickey, I think I can use your idea for something else. By the way...I almost always find a client's true identity. I don't use it for anything, but I like to know who I'm dealing with should problems arise once I'm there, or sometime afterward; prescription medication in the 'ol toiletries bag. The only guy I really ever had a problem with - the one who thought he'd phone in a bomb threat to the airline another client was using to come visit me the following evening, when he decided *he* would like to see me that night instead - I got his name off medication, just for backup. Hooray for clever helpful monkeys! Now I just have to round up fake id - I don't have credit cards, so over the net is out; I'll find a location here in Vancouver. Or make one. Cool! Another project!
• Bruce Schneier of Crypto-Gram fame wrote about a way around the system in August 2003. I have, ahhh, "heard" that it works. The only point of failure is if you get picked out for additional screening at the gate, and even then you might get away with it. Might be worth a shot.
• Whoa. Photoshop and $1.50 got me where I wanted to go. Kinda spooky, actually.
• MonkeyFilter: We will not be seizing control of North America with our unbeatable army of robot ninja flying squirrels from the Earth's Core until June, so all super-stealth suggestions will be gratefully accepted until you notice the Ottawa, D.C., and Mexico City in flaming ruins, and muffled mechanical chittering beneath your home.
• Yeah! Burn down the D.F.!!!! Erm, wait... :\
• Bruce Schneier of Crypto-Gram fame wrote about a way around the system in August 2003. I have, ahhh, "heard" that it works. The only point of failure is if you get picked out for additional screening at the gate, and even then you might get away with it. Might be worth a shot. Crypto-gram would probably be good reading for anyone who enjoyed this thread, although the geek content factor is a bit higher. Good luck with your shady dealings MJ. Have you chosen a fake name yet? May I suggest Chesty LaRue, or perhaps Busty Sinclair?
• Hooty McBoob!!
• No, no, go the other direction. My favorite fake name to give out to people is "Brunhilda Thudpucker." I also like "Gertrude Giltrude"
• Anonymous travel is probably possible by foot alone, and even then in the US you are subject to being harrassed by the police, even before 9/11. Check out John Gilmore's desire to travel by air: anonymously
• Go for it MJ! take care...
• I'm partial to Fluffy McBunnyslippers and Tits Magee. In reality though, you must all call me Ms. Rojas. Well, in fake reality.
• I did book reviews for a time billed as Siouxsie Poontang. Man...I love ridiculous names! If I ever get an opinion column, I'm calling it "Tit for Tat with Tits Magee!" Unless it's maybe a little low-rent, in which case it will be "Tits and Tats on Tits Magee".
• Tits Magee is fantastic. You know Tits Magee's got moxie, that girl. She don't take no guff off no one, nohow. She talks ninety miles per hour and might just sock ya one if ya try to get fresh. But if she likes ya, why, she's just swell.
• I like your style, mister! That's right, I do! And you're right about Tits Magee...why just yesterday she told me about a swell idea she has about going to New York City and opening her own club! A speakeasy, see, and that's not all, she says she'll do the place up with all those crazy things she got overseas. And wouldn't you know? She's going to call it Tits Magee's Good Times Club and Curio Emporium! See, a lady like that has connections to all sorts of things, and she'll be selling shrunken heads and voodoo powders, and she'll have the 100 year-old-skin of a tattooed sailor over the bar! That's moxie. That's Tits Magee!
• And talk about gams! *whistles appreciatively*