February 08, 2005

Curious, Sellout? In your career, did you choose to work for love or money?

Any regrets or fears? If you're unhappy with your choice, what gets you through the day and lets you sleep at night? What's more important to you, a more comfortable old age or looking back on an uncompromised life? And can you really have both, or is that just a myth? (disclosure: 34, at the crossroads between well-paid/boring career and poorly-paid/interesting career. Well-paid/interesting may be impossible. I'd love to hear your stories.)

  • Well-paid/interesting may be impossible not necessarily. i was "called" to journalism; many reporters feel the same way. there's nothing else we would ever want to do -- nothing. i began reporting when i was 14 and that was that. loved it then, love it now, look forward to every day and each different story. i got into it knowing i'd never make much money, and that was fine. but i also knew i'd never want kids so i wouldn't need a whole bunch of money. i kept progressing from one job to another and here i am at 44, doing what i love and being paid quite nicely. never expected it, so it's a very sweet happy ending. (i can call it an "ending" as i plan to stay at my current job through retirement-age, knock wood). it sounds terribly trite, but follow your heart or gut or instinct or whatever you call it. because that's where you're meant to be.
  • In my career, necessity was the determining factor. Jobless and on the verge of going totally broke, my sister got me my first "office" job. Started at reception and worked my way up through editorial and landed in IT. Been here for damn near 7 years, so I guess it's a "career" though I still just look at it as a job. *loads gun* Anyway, as long as I make enough to keep me in smokes, video games, and beer, what the hell else is there? Don't plan on having any human kids (the kitties are enough 'sponsibility for me, thank you very much), and I don't reallly have an interest that one can find a job in... (making and testing video games is a fucking drag, I like the finished products.) I did toy with the idea of being a mechanic or taxi driver for awhile, as I love driving and cars in general, but I'm too used to sitting on my ass. I'm a shining pillar of mediocrity! YAY!!! *pulls trigger*
  • I have a friend who has always wanted to play music for a living. He has been working on it his entire adult life. In spite of the fact that he is good he hasn't really made it big. But, he gets by on gigs in clubs, giving lessons, sometimes taking a landscaping job or whatever. When we first became friends, he played music all the time for fun. Now he won't pick up an instrument unless he is going to get paid. Maybe the situation would be different if he has a big record deal or whatever, but I wonder... There are some real benefits to doing what you love as a hobby - it remains what you love, not what you have to do to survive.
  • Sellout, definitely. Law school, or as I called it, Plan B. But as far as selling out goes, I did it in a very relaxed way -- small town lawyer, wills and real estate, no pressure, civilized hours. Money isn't overwhelming, but as long as I have enough to pay the bills and keep a steady supply of books and music, then all my needs are met. The work itself is, uh, well it's not pleasurable, but it's not the mines, either. Supporting my quality of life is my only concern. No regrets.
  • Right now, money alone. But I'm not in my final career, thank God, rather just working my way back through a setback by returning to school. Events occasionally make me question where I am now (today's been one of 'em), but what gets me through is the knowledge that I'm (please, dear God) headed to something that's both more fulfilling and more remunerative. Personally, I'd say shoot for happiness first. As long as you can still afford a roof, clothing and food, you shouldn't have to work a job you hate just to get more stuff. The stuff is nice, though...
  • What's a career? I ended up taking a job about 10 years ago when I realized that I wasn't cut out for the career track I'd chosen. I'm still doing the same job, just in a different place. I'm more or less fine with that, except that I'm never going to make enough to pay off my student loans (which are federal, so bankruptcy is not an option). I would love more interesting work, but I don't necessarily want my work to define my life. I like leaving at the end of the day and not thinking about it until the next morning. If I didn't have huge debts, and if I didn't think people will think less of me the older I get doing this kind of work, I wouldn't consider looking for a "career".
  • My career (electronics design engineer) is an extension of what used to be a hobby (tinkering with electronics). It pays well, so I guess I have the best of both worlds. I did go through a period a few years ago (about the age you are now, shinything) where I wanted a complete career change. I hated the cubicled isolation and lack of human contact, and seriously considered buying and operating a bar. (Couldn't do it on my own and couldn't find any willing partners). The feeling eventually passed and here I sit in a cubicle...
  • Sellout here. I sold out to Big Pharma because health education does not pay. But I tell myself that I am learning all of the management skills to start a non-profit someday. Also because I am supporting my partner while she is in school pursuing her artistic dreams. So it balances out, right? Right?
  • I had a quarter life crisis after 7 years as a retail manager. I had gotten my Master's in Social Work three years before, but couldn't find work in my field (non-profit management). Finally, I broke up with my BF, quit my job and moved to NYC in order to find work in the non-profit world that would be personally fulfilling to me. That was four years ago. I am 31 now, and I have never made a better decision in my life. Yes, I struggle with the fact that I will never be making tons of money. In fact, my true passion is grassroots organizing, which pays virtually nothing. Lately, I've been considering a career change where I would be freelancing in order to have more time to do the non-paid work that is so important to me. But much to my mother's chagrin, I never see myself working in the for-profit corporate world again.
  • I work for mostly for money. Don't get me wrong, I like my job, but if it didn't pay well enough, I wouldn't be doing it. I still haven't found the job I love but at this point in my life, I don't think it's possible. So much for the American Dream.
  • I'm too dumb/talentless to have a career, so I'm just a white-collar servant. Nothing to contribute. But this thread is really interesting. Everything isn't perfect the instant you get the job you wanted; who knew? ;)
  • I'm in much the same situation as Debaser - I got boxed into general office work several years ago, and now manage an office for a very tiny interior design firm. I used to want to do web design, then did a retail site and hated it. After not knowing what the hell I wanted to do for about a year, I decided to get my MCSA and either open up a support business or gain a position with a small company, working with their computers, sometime in the next few years. Essentially, I'm going for the money. BUT! I refuse to compromise on certain things, like the size of the biz (must be small) and the industry (I prefer something creative). So, it's some give and some take. I feel that as long as I have certain criteria met, I can make as much money as I can at one place & do all my charitable & community-oriented stuff after work.
  • tried both, eventually ended up at a compromise. I wanted to be an academic--loved translation, etc. So I tried that, and was losing money/started to resent it. So I thought I'd turn to making money. I tested software, figured it could lead to other things. I hated it, and eventually couldn't do it any more (market and patience for that culture evaporated). After a lengthy bit of soul searching, I came up with something that I could do that would earn money but that I wouldn't hate. I'd never have labeled transporation planning as a passion, but it held my interest. Another tour of grad school, and now I have a job that I enjoy. Not huge money, but I can make my student loan payments and not live on beans.
  • Funny, I ask myself that question all the damn time. I spent 4 years in college and received an English degree, which I looked at on my wall every morning before trudging off to another day in Retail Drugstore Management. Seventeen years I did that. I had a good salary, primo position, and everything I could ask for in a management position. Then, almost on a whim, I quit. I quit simply because I wanted to try to write for living. And here I am two years later. Am I successful in the writing biz? No, not entirely. Do I feel better about myself? Completely. Do I miss steady paychecks? Certainly, but if I didn’t give writing a chance, I would have regretted that missed opportunity every day until I put a bullet in my head somewhere around my 45th birthday. So...any realtors or mortgage bankers out there need a newsletter?
  • Necessity only. What I love doesn't pay.
  • You only have one life so you wanna work at a job that you get some enjoyment from. That was what made me go into software. I did that for six years before getting tired of it and then went into management. Did that for another ten. It was mostly a lot of fun. Until the end, when it got insane. I decided to leave, quit. I saved up enough to do something i've always wanted which was to write....and now i'm trying out a totally new lifestyle. Two books that help me find my way that i recommend: Your Money or Your Life: provides a framework about how to think this peso vs passion question. Hard-assed and practical. The ultimate currency isn't cash, it's time. How to Live the Life you Love, by Barbara Sher. You're supposed to be doing something with your life, but what the heck is it? This book helped me figure it out. She also wrote "It's Never too Late. Starting your second life at age 40" but you don't have to be 40 to read and get something out of it. I should also add "How to Change the World" by David Bornstein, which has some cool inspiring examples of folks who made a difference with their lives.
  • Those who are getting paid to do what they love. Would you do it if you weren't paid?
  • I'm lucky enough to work in something I supposedly love, programming. I really feel it's a calling of sorts. I've always been on the fringes of open source, power-to-the-people projects. But I can't really do that stuff. I'm smart enough, and I care enough, but it turns out I'm not the kind of guy who can work on a mad science project in his bedroom, all alone. Or, rather, I can, but I never really complete my projects. So... day jobs. After giving up a lot of my youth to a keyboard and a monitor, there's very little evidence I was even alive. Websites vanish, software revs. And most of what you wrote was doomed to failure, and was probably a bad idea in the first place, usually assisting the director of IT in keeping up with the buzzword du jour. In theory I'm smart enough to go indie, and work on projects that I really care about. I tried that, and now my bank account is going into double digits. I just don't have the drive to work on something in my bedroom all alone, like when I was a teenager. Today I cashed in some mutual funds, so now I've got half a year before I'm on the street or whatever. I was just contacted by a company I swore I would never, ever work for again. The owner specializes in ULTIMATE sellouts -- taking a radical, revolutionary stance, but secretly he's a sociopath, who would sell his customers' souls for a dollar and fifty cents. But beggars can't be choosers, and I sent them my résumé. The only thing I've found really fulfilling is a volunteer tutoring gig I started at a local high school. I do like turning their minds on, but you'd have to be insane to want to be a high school teacher in today's system. Even the teachers there tell me so.
  • A little from Column A... I work a day job strictly for money. But I spend most of my spare time writing and directing, which I hope will be my source of income within the next few years. For the most part I couldnt be happier because being here in LA I am part of a community of people like me who came here to follow their dreams. So many times you hear the negative stereotypes associated with the "waiter who's really an actor" and I just dont get it. Frankly, 90% or more of the actors I know are smart, interesting people trying to follow their dreams. I really dont have much to say to a waiter who is happy being a waiter his whole life. If that's your choice, fine, but I am a dreamer and that is the kind of person I relate to...
  • (When can we hear from moneyjane..?)
  • Two follow-ups: 1)I am a dreamer and that is the kind of person I relate to Wow I really made myself sound like a douchebag there. 2) I guess i really REALLY always wanted to be a rock star, but I had no musical talent. I love writing, but part of the reason I love is it is because I feel like I have some talent for it and can legitimately succeed at it. I dont think I could keep pursuing something if I didnt think I had what it takes to be good at it.
  • Sold out for money. But it's more than that. My degrees are in Communications - journalism, primarily. I was going to be a writer, a novelist. I got a job out of school as a reporter, moved up in the ranks, eventually became a news director for a small group of weekly newspapers. It was good work, and I enjoyed it. But I quit to return to school and finish my Master's, as well as take an opportunity to teach a bit, which I enjoyed immensely. It was only after my contract with the University ended, and I had my Master's in hand, that I came to my own personal crossroads. I had two job offers. One, the night editorship of a small daily, was my step into the Show, journalism-wise. The paper promised me a year on nights, at which point their E in C would retire and I'd take over the news. The pay was adequate to the job (read: marginally better than abject poverty), no benefits, had to move to a rural town. The second was a "communications specialist" position in a downtown financial services firm. Wear a suit, work 9 to 5, benefits, and about twice my previous high salary. If I wanted to stay in journalism, the first choice was the way to go. It'd be hard at first, but five years down the road, that small daily would almost certainly launch me into the world of metropolitan daily journalism. But, as always, there were other considerations. I was married, and the journo job would be hard on her, as they always are - she'd already put u[ with years my being gone nights, weekends, etc. I had an ulcer. I was a two pack a day Marlboro man. I caroused pretty hard. {more}
  • But all that is secondary to what journalism had taught me: that being a professional writer - and aspiring to be a professional novelist - is an unforgiving business. Only the most talented, most dedicated people succeed to the level that I desired. I had published a few pieces - fiction, creative nonfiction - but had had rejected many more, pieces that I'd agonized over. I realized that I simply had neither the talent nor the drive to succeed as a writer. It wasn't easy to admit - I am a bullshitter of some skill, and oneself is the easiest mark to bullshit. But there is, for the vast majority of us, a point in our lives when our dreams have diverged sufficiently from our reality - and what's more, our plausible reality - that we have to come to the admission that they have become, for practical purposes, unattainable. I will never be a novelist. I will never be a great writer, nor a great journalist. It's a humbling realization, but it's the truth - most of us will live perfectly average lives. Most of us will not achieve any notable achievements, nor will we acquire great riches, nor fame. We will not change the world - in fact, our lives, most of us, will pass through this existence as a skiff atop the ocean: a brief wake, and then the ocean reforms behind as if the skiff had never passed. And with that, I came to one further realization - that one's dreams needn't be excised, but rather... amended. I will never be a great writer, it's true. But I can be a good marketing executive. I can be a good neighbor, a good husband, a good father. I can take what pleasures this world has to offer, and in turn make the worlds of those around me comfortable, secure, perhaps a little sweeter. It is a smaller dream, certainly - but an accomplishable dream, a practical dream. {still more}
  • I took the communications specialist job. That was 7.5 years ago, and I have done well at it. Tomorrow, I go to North Carolina to receive my (final) promotion, before the company ejects me back into the world sometime in the next 18 months. I have taken a lot from this company - money, sure; benefits; but I have taken a good measure of pleasure from doing a job well, and doing so has given me the ability to insulate my family and, to certains extents, my friends from the predations of this world. And it has allowed me to give myself a bit of the pleasures of this world, and the potential to continue to do so. I could have chased the greater dream, but I would have done so not only to my detriment, but to the detriment of those around me, the people who depend on me the most. Their welfare is a duty I take very seriously - it is perhaps my single most important impetus and goal. And while I would have liked to have been a novelist? That welfare was not a price, I decided, that I could pay. This may seem a little sad - but it's not, so much as sobering, at least at the time. I am by nature both cheerful and ribald, and I take a lot of pleasure out of this life, and even more from the knowledge that my efforts are making the lives of people better. I may never be a novelist - but I can read novels, and know their quality, and pass that to others. I know what I cannot change, and that gives me power to affect the change that I can. And I accomplish what dreams I have, or know that, in time and with dedication, I may - rather than continue to brear the constant, damning weight of a Sisyphian dream that I can never attain. It is, for me, a better thing, and I do not regret of making that choice, 7.5 years ago.
  • I just got a job translating a bunch of old naval documents. I get paid for three years, during which time I publish three books. Aren't universities great?
  • *Accomplishable Dream #137: Kill Wolof*
  • Those who are getting paid to do what they love. Would you do it if you weren't paid? yup.
  • Would I do this for no pay? I would and I have.
  • I went to college and studied what I was good at, and now I have a well-paying job for one of the evil corporate overlords that I'm mostly good at (except the office political stuff). But it's boring as hell and way, way too stressful. Sometimes I feel like a sellout, other times I think I made the right choice because I'm an expert in my tiny little corner of the world and that's the kind of thing that makes me happy. I am terribly jealous of those who have a calling.
  • *Accomplishable Dream #137: Kill Wolof* Getting paid for that?
  • Oh, and would I do this for no pay? Absolutely not. Maybe that's my answer, then.
  • I've worked as an accountant for over 10 years, and it pays the bills. I wouldn't call it love, but rather knowing ahead of time what career would suit me. Would you do it if you weren't paid? I have done tax returns for friends out of the kindness of my heart or a bottle of wine. Does that count?
  • I'm at this crossroads right now myself. A week ago I left my job and in two days I'm moving to a new city with no job and no permanent place to live, but I've got a chunk of money in the bank and a willingness to try anything. This is remarkable for me, I have always made the safe choice, but it got to the point where I just...couldn't. I did a good job at my last job, I worked hard and got the company through a rough spot and I'm proud of that. But the work itself was the exact opposite of what I'm naturally good at, and eventually the struggle to overcome my natural inclinations and the inability to use my talents was too much for me. I'm going to use this time to check out the books StoryBored recommended and try to figure out where to go from here. I expect this will take a while, and I'm practical enough to realize I might need to take another job I hate to make ends meet. Even if that happens at least I will have tried, and not just sat back and watched other people discover their dreams and make them happen. Wish me luck.
  • A while back I went in to pick up a few days of freelance web work at a big New York City publisher that a friend of mine worked at. I just wanted to pay my rent that month. Well, it's five years later and I'm still here. I've realised that I have been essentially whittling away my life at something that I find neither good nor bad, satisfying or distressing. It's just barely humane and lucrative enough to keep me doing it, but just bothersome enough that I REALLY would be distressed to wake up and see that I've pissed away another 5 years doing it and it's not NEARLY lucrative enough that I could ever dream to get ahead doing it. So, one way or the other I am quitting in June, and the Mrs and I are moving to Austin, TX. Maybe I'll do some actual freelance work for the company I work for now, maybe I'll go back to my previous career as a book/record/video store clerk, maybe I'll actually be accepted in to the graduate program at UT I just applied to (please pull for me, monkeys), maybe some combination. Who knows? But for sure I am DELIGHTED by the prospect of NOT doing THIS anymore. A life lived as a zombie is not for me. I suspected it 5 years ago and I KNOW it know. on preview: very best of luck, Cali.
  • For love or money, eh? Shiny, this is a question I've been wrestling with the past couple of years. I got into hardware development because of my techno-geekery, which is why a lot of engineers become engineers I guess. So a little of the choice is due to love. It's nearly ten years since I've been in the biz and I find myself a little disenchanted with the jobs I've had. My current position is fairly pleasant, however, and the job affords me some luxuries for which I'm thankful. I'm basically here because the job's paying the bills and keeping me ensconced in the lifestyle to which I've become accustomed. So a little of the choice is due to money. After going through my twenties with the "my life is my job" mentality, I've now come to my senses and am now trying to live a life worth living. I've decided to see my job as something which enables me to do the things I want to do, namely travel, being with friends, and having adventures. On preview, best of luck to both Cali and dirtdirt, not to mention to shinything and all monkeys everywhere to live lives of fulfillment, excitement and adventure.
  • Fes: you write quite beautifully about your life. Made me want to knock on your door and ask if we could be friends, preferably rectroactively for the past 20 years. Are you sure you weren't meant to be a biographer?
  • I'm a HS English teacher. I do it because I love it. I have to sellout in small ways (can't show this movie, can't talk about that subject), but I know I'm doing what I was put here to do, and helping to spread the nonviolent revolution every day. Would I do this if I weren't being paid? You call this getting paid?
  • Good luck with the move, Cali. That's a brave thing to do. )))) I always knew I wanted to do something sciencey and after graduating with a degree in chemistry, I assumed I'd spend the rest of my life in a lab setting of one kind or another. After four years of lab work, I knew I wanted to tackle problems that felt more directly relevent to life (rather than, say, measuring bond energies in obscure organometallic complexes). I got a master's in environmental health and have now started a phd in epidemiology, which means I'll probably never mix shit up in a lab again. But I love what I study. It's complex, directly related to everyday life and at least has the potential help people. I've a pile of debt from school that wouldn't be there if I'd stayed in the "hard" sciences and I won't make shitloads of money, but I know that I won't be a pauper either. If all else fails, I can sellout to big pharma.
  • Well...I decided to go to the source. If I was going to be part of the service industry I was going to make the big bucks and be the boss of me, thank you. And...it turned out to be my calling. I get paid lots of dough to be clever and eat expensive food. Oh. And the fucking. But I'm good at that too, and given my general detachment from the universe, I don't have to deal with weird emotional fallout. I got into this with safety as priority one. I only have clients from other cities or countries. I never answer calls directly; they have to leave a message on voicemail, and I call back if I like the vibe. I only go to high-end hotels on the theory that a business exec from elsewhere will be reluctant to cause any kind of a scene in the Hyatt, followed by arrest and incarceration in a strange city. Even the shit that's wrong with me works for me with this gig. Paranoia, hyper-alertness and my ever-ready willingness to fuck somebody's shit right up make me a safe girl, PTSD be damned. The expensive hotels know what's up - hard not to when I get front desk to break hundreds so I can get a cab - and do not fuck with me. They like clients to be happy, especially high-rollers, and see me as complementary to their own services. My last ace? This is Canada, baby, and if any client tries to go all Kobe on me I have no problem calling the cops because I won't get any charges. I thought I'd explain all this stuff because I think a lot of people think what I do is super-dangerous. Honestly, the way I got it set up, it really isn't particularily hazardous. Would I do it for free? No. That's what relationships are for. God bless 'monogamy'- it'll keep the money rolling in until I'm shakin' it in my walker and giving gum jobs to ancient dudes in blingin' wheelchairs.
  • Love. I work in "entertainment". That means that I can go for months at a time without work. No job security. I currently work at a crap daytime TV show doing video graphics. The people are nice, but the content of the show is for shit. I have worked as a computer game designer, a virtual reality experience designer, a theme park producer, a commercial producer, a prop master, set dresser, just about everything in entertainment. Hell, I almost had a script made (long, painful story, don't ask). Nonetheless, I do love showbiz and showbiz people, even if they are all fucked up. I guess it takes one to know one.
  • I commend Squidranch for having the nuts to post after monkeyjane. Hard act to follow, sistah. I work at what I once loved, but have come to loathe. Now it's only for the money and I wish I'd known 15 yrs ago what I do now. Monster debt and a kid will do much to erase any potential for career change. Choose your dreams wisely, monkeys!
  • Maryh, can you point us to an example of your cartooning?
  • Both maryh and pikestrider touch on a interesting point, something that I've learned over the past few years: work in the creative fields is still work. I'm still only a student, although I'm about to graduate and try to figure out how to make it as an artist, but painting/drawing/animating for me is never "fun." I do it because I think I'm decent at it, because I don't know what else I'd do, and a lot of other reasons that I'm not really sure about it. From what I can tell, both from myself and all the other artists and art students I've met, the artist with a burning passion to create is a bit of a myth. Doing what you love as a full-time career often takes it away from being what you love and simply makes it what you do. The one thing it has going for it, though, is that it's never boring. Painfully frustrating, existentially harrowing, and (in the visual arts in particular) occassionally very lonely - but never boring. I guess that's a plus.
  • Fes: sounds like you really thought deeply about your choices and picked what was right for you at the time. But now that 7.5 years have passed how about re-opening the can of worms. You said you had "no talent" as a writer. I'm one of those fools who happen to think talent doesn't matter as much as whether you love doing something or not. What say you? Cabingirl: "I am terribly jealous of those who have a calling.". This is probably presumptuous of me but i think you can find yours. It's not necessarily easy but you can try Barbara Sher's book, it's probably at the library.(the book that is, not the calling). Cali: the best of luck! Your experience sounds a bit like mine. I took the easy way out for quite some time. The good news is that with our longer life spans, you can have it both ways. You mentioned the other key to success, the chunk of money. I've found that if you want to live a dream life, frugality makes it a lot easier. ChrisMoore: If you're doing what you love, you'll eventually be able to get some pay from it though whether the pay is enough is the tough choice we all have to make... Verbose: Have you thought about being a private tutor? Lots of anxious parents would be willing to pay for good mentoring in math, computers etc. Moneyjane: I envy you your detachment. ------ (back to the topic) But what it all comes down to: have you ever had the feeling when you wake up and feel, shit, i have to go to work? I had that feeling once too often. It ain't worth it. The feeling i wanted to get is to be totally immersed in my work and then suddenly think "they pay me for this?". And if they don't pay you, you're still having a bang up time.
  • You're right, Roach. I have spent a lot of time trying to talk my fellow writers out of the "inpsiration" myth- essentially the belief that writing or any art consists of sitting around waiting for some divine spirit to move your hand, and if you're not in the mood to do your work on a certain day, its OK to slack off until you get "inpsired." As far as I'm concerned, "inspiration" is just as irrelevant to a writer as it is to say, a bricklayer. When it's time to work, you go to work, whether you feel like it or not, and eventually you might accomplish something.
  • As for whether it's "fun" or not, sometimes. "Satisfying" might be a better word. Just this past Friday I realized it was 2am, I had been working on editing something I had filmed all night, and I hadnt even considered going out socially or doing anything else. Whether it was "fun" or not, there was nothing else I would've rather been doing.
  • Hey, I'm a myth! I was that artist with a burning passion to create. It was all I wanted to do from the time I was first able to pick up a pencil or a crayon and apply it to paper. (Well, except for the several months I drove everyone crazy by declaring that I wanted to be a lion and doing my best approximation of a roar when spoken to.) What, exactly, in the art field I wanted to do changed over time, depending on the interest of the moment. Through most of high school, and it seemed to be it, I wanted to do special effects art and work at ILM someday. At the time, there was no specific curriculum you could follow in college for special effects art. Learning to do graphics and animation on the computer was not a necessity, since it was still pretty much in its infancy at the time. I had an art teacher that was more a mentor than a teacher, and she put me in contact with someone who worked for ILM. He had course suggestions and advice that were invaluable for my projected career plan. Ironically, this also led to a change of said career plan. I needed a good grounding in animation, he said, so I took some courses. I fell madly in love with it. It was a connection deeper than any I'd found in my various artistic pursuits. I'd always had a passion to create that was so strong it felt like a necessity. Animation raised that to another level, and I needed it like oxygen.I spotted a niche in animation that wasn't filled, and developed a plan, and knew that this was what I was going to do for the rest of my life. Then, about halfway through my first semester, my hand was injured, repeatedly. Regular dislocations of the first three fingers and thumb of my right hand. The ex-boyfriend who did this is long since gone, but the damage is permanent. I tried to struggle on, but I'd lost so much fine control and doing work caused so much pain that I wound up dropping out my second semester after discovering animation. I've worked a number of jobs in various fields since, but they were always just something to keep a roof over my head while I tried to figure out what I wanted to do now that the road I'd wanted was closed to me. Amusement parks, file clerking, office manager, executive assistant, technical support, escrow processor, for the highlights. I was often miserabley unhappy with the jobs I had, but stuck with them and gave them my best. The hardest part about those years was the inability to create. I sought other outlets that wouldn't bump up against the damage to my hand, but nothing gave me the particular release I needed. It always ended in frustration and a feeling like some indefinable part of me was slowly and painfully dying inside. I finally settled on computer graphics, something I'd begun to do in the try-it-to-see-if-it-feeds-the-need vein. It didn't, but it was closer than anything else I found, and it's something I enjoy even if I don't love it passionately. I've gone back to college to get my degree in it and I'm planning on computer gaming when I'm done. Since I started back to college, I've found something that I'm passionately in love with for the first time since the hand injury. A required course for the computer graphics degree: photography. I still plan on doing the computer graphics as a job I can enjoy. I've no interest in setting up a studio and taking high school graduation pictures for the rest of my life. But at least I'll have it as a hobby, and have back the joy of a form of creativity that speaks to the depths of my soul.
  • Well, as I just wrote in the other thread, I resigned on Monday. In three weeks I leave my safe little career as the communications manager in an art museum and jump into a strange new job as a sort of PA/general manager/gal friday for a nice visionary ex hippie guy who owns several successful small businesses: a vegetarian restaurant, a brewpub and a microbrewery that he wants to grow into a bigger - macro? - brewery. I'm not sure what I'll be doing, I'm not sure how it's all going to work out, I don't know where my office is and I'm alternately terrified and overjoyed. I'm sick of being desperately poor for a Noble Cause and I want to make some money for the first time in my life. So, at 41, I'm giving up the goddamn arts and moving into capitalism, and I hope it works out. Mostly, in my life, I haven't done much - tried to work as little as possible for as long as possible: waited tables, worked in a health food store, stuffed envelopes, etc. My first priority has always been TIME - will this job give me time with my children & time to just be me? But even so somehow I ended up with a career in the arts - art education, museum education. I had a great job in Baltimore and didn't realize it until I moved and got the job I just quit. That job boiled down to throwing parties for rich people and writing press releases about exhibitions that I had no information on, and I have more or less hated it for 4 1/2 long years, except I did like my coworkers. But it didn't even pay worth a good goddamn, so in addition to all this, I have to go bankrupt! Jeeze! So, this is a very long winded way of saying, I tried doing it for love & art & all that good idealistic stuff and now? Forget that, I'm broke. What the hell, in my new job at least I'll get to drink good beer for a discount and book bands and have some strange fun and I will be making more money and maybe, just maybe, I will have a new career that I'll genuinely like. Plus, I get to keep my stupid hippie ideals - I still will never have worked for Mega Corp. but that's really just because they never asked me
  • Monkeyfilter: giving gum jobs to ancient dudes in blingin' wheelchairs
  • What is this thing called 'career'?
  • Squidranch as virtual reality experience designer. Why does this frighten me so?
  • God I love you hairy critters. This is amazing! Thank you so much for sharing your insights. You've all given me lots to think about.
  • Mandyman: Not Big Pharma. Please, no.
  • This is probably presumptuous of me but i think you can find yours. Nah, not presumptuous. I know I could find something more fulfilling but oh, the inertia. But even if I did find my calling tomorrow, at the age of 30, I'll still be jealous of those who knew at age 14, like SideDish.
  • I'm starting my third career now. Since I can't hold a steady job because boredom and depression always gets me down I work self emplyed since 18 years now. Sometimes I made a lot of money, sometimes I just can get by. After a short career in animation I started to use computers more and more and people started to pay me to make multimedia thingies (CD-Roms) and Shockwave web games. Now Flash has almost taken over that market segment and since I sincerely hate Flash as a development enviromment I now am learning myself to design and make furniture. I learn new skills everyday and it is scary and fun at the same time. I've done a couple of commisions now (built in closets and bookcases) and compared to computer work it's hard work (physical too) for not much money. But at least there is something that you can touch, that will be used the next couple of years and that's not axed before it's finished like a couple of my past multimedia projects. So basically, I work for love. But it has to pay something so I can pay the bills.
  • I started out working for love; now I do it for money while I finish my masters degree on the side, so that I can pay the bills and not put myself into irreparable debt. Is that being a sellout, I wonder? I'm not sure.
  • It's a lot closer to love than money, because I enjoy what I do, and I am flat broke. I mean occasional fits of solvency between long stretches of making that buck stretch. I got into what I'm doing now, building canoe trails, as a break from something else I was working on. I figured six months, a year tops and I'd be done. Four years later I'm not even halfway there. I think when you hit that thing that's best for you to work on at a given moment, considerations like 'love' or 'like' fall away to be replaced by the realization that there is no one else with your mix of attributes ready to do the job. You may be good at it, or not, but you are doing it.
  • Right now, watching the clouds go by, and a sign on the road... left, or right? Oh well. And I thought it was only me. Yeah, sure. I landed my own niche back in my youth, doing stuff I loved to do (computer graphics). Time passed, and my income came from two sources: low-paying, boring, stressful, stable day job, and better paying, stressful, interesting, challenging freelance jobs. My own place, no kids, no steady relationship, no plans for marrying anytime soon have let me some slack, financial-wise. But... time has gone by. I need to keep upo with newer technologies if I want to stay in the market. Physical and family situation aren't the optimal. And those damned hairs in the tub keep multiplying... Right now, have a chance for some better paying job, with the caveats of being even more stressful. I don't know if I want that. That this opportunity appeared just as some deep doubts about my job and my future were growing doesn't help. To wrap it up: love or money? Definitely, it started by love, and I was lucky enough that it did bring some money. But today, after more than my share of no-soul jobs done just so the bills can be paid, I don't now anymore. Perhaps I could fling poo...
  • I honestly believe its worth pursuing your dreams and letting the money come later. I spent many years trying to convince myself I didn't want to work in the entertainment industry, when that's in fact all I wanted to do. After a job in tech, a couple graduate degrees, and many years wondering how to be happy, I'm finally producing and writing for television and recently achieved a goal I set out to achieve. Which is: I had always wanted to produce for National Geographic. It seemed very exotic to work for them. My perfect job: TV, travel, natural history. Well, I'm just finishing up a production for National Geographic right now. Its a great feeling to have accomplished something I set out to do. I never would have had that feeling if I had stayed in tech. I would have always wondered - and that's enough to convince me that no matter what - its always worth pursuing your dreams. The positive psychic energy you reap is worth more than money.
  • debris7, you are now a member of my unofficial "Monkeys who have 7 in their handle Mafia". Ahem. I did Creative Arts at uni, majored in Theatre and Media. I also did a Cultural Studies degree, coming out a Baudrillard-obsessed Media Theory MA student. I run an IT helpdesk at one of the most beautiful gardens in the country. My office is a 150-year-old cottage surrounded by trees and rare plants, with a lake not ten metres away. In the backyard (!) of my office there is a gazebo and a lemon tree! I work Monday-Thursday. And I earn enough money to live on. Job Satisfaction, I CHOOSE YOU!
  • Money was never my prime motivator, beyong earning enough to keep body and soul together. I always felt lucky to be born in a welfare state in a time of peace and relative prosperity. I wanted to play a part, however small, in social progress, since my ambition really is to live as if in the first days of a better world. Won't pretend to have achieved much but my quixotic quest has taken me places I'd never have dreamed of going and introduced me to people I'll love and value until my dying day. To quote the poet: 'This is plenty. This is more than enough'.
  • my hand was injured, repeatedly. Regular dislocations of the first three fingers and thumb of my right hand. The ex-boyfriend who did this is long since gone good god, christophine. that's awful, like something out of some bad pulp-fiction novel. are you saying your ex purposefully destroyed your hand? wow. it constantly amaze me, how human beings can be so cruel. i'm so sorry for you.
  • I'm a elementary school music teacher who has also spent a big chunk of his 8-year teaching career as a high school choral director, a voice coach, and pianist/organist for an indie band. I just resigned as music director for a fairly high-profile local chorus, but also just completed my first commission as a composer, so that kind of balances out. None of this stuff pays well, and I'm usually in a financial struggle of some sort, but I love it all.
  • I'm a Software QA Engineer and both love the job AND get paid well. The pay makes up for all the abuse I receive when people find out I work on Internet Advertising Software.
  • I chose to work for love, and my work did not earn me any monetary profit. My work does seem to be earning a rather healthy monetary profit by todays monetary prophets.
  • Are you talking about the carpentry, JC?
  • LokiSpeak, I am so glad that you love that job... my time in QA was some of the worst I've spent, but that was usually because no one in the company saw the value of testing (comedy: my former position as lead tester was outsourced to India, and then sent to Ukraine about 4 months ago because the Indian firm "wasn't stable enough"). Cali--holler before you come to Austin, and perhaps we can arrange a monkey's welcome! back on topic--would I do this without getting paid? yeah, to a certain extent. like one of my mentors said, I can wake up in the morning and put on my white hat before I go to work. planners are the good guys.
  • Patita: My experience with outsourcing is that in the ends it always costs the company more then hiring their own QA stuff. I feel for you on that one.
  • moneyjane, I used to work for a company called Iwerks Entertainment that partnered with Evans and Sutherland (a computer simulation company) to come up with a virtual reality experience for the theme park industry. E&S were the big dogs of airline and military simulation back during the cold war and wanted to take advantage of Iwerks' theme park contacts. Iwerks did large screen projection systems and motion base stuff (think Star Tours at Disneyland). Not something that I thought I'd be doing with a masters in film production, but during the 90's it was a fun ride, with VR being the hep technology of the moment. I got to travel a lot and made a decent chunk of change. I kind of miss it because VR and theme park stuff is fun to work on in that they bring together so many different disciplines, from film, to computer simulation, to architecture, to you name it.
  • This seems as good a place as any to point out how damn many of you like to to sit down and have a drink with, pick your brain for the evening. Some of you damn people are fascinating. Especially the hot ones.
  • SideDish: His goal wasn't to destroy my hand, it was to "discipline" me for being a "bad girlfriend." Though the effect in the end was the same as if he'd specifically set out to destroy my hand. This was 16, 17 years ago. I'm long since over it, but tend not to mention things like this because it tends to upset people who are hearing it for the first time. I've avoided contributing to some threads here entirely, because a real answer would delve into my bad pulp fiction past (and thanks for the phrase. I'd never thought of it that way before, but you're right.) I have no desire to turn MoFi into my personal therapy session. That's what journals are for. I probably shouldn't have mentioned how the hand injury came about now. I guess it seemed like a good idea at the time. Thank you for the kind words. But rest assured, it's all long in the past, and life's all good now. </derail>
  • Hmm. My first career was for love - public health. (And it was down and dirty public health - interviewing injection drug users about needle use and sex practices for a study on HIV, begun in the 80s by a visionary epidemiologist who concentrated on street users. That's a long, long, time ago in HIV epidemiology, and a different population than was otherwise being concentrated on.) After I burned out on that - not hard to do - I became a librarian, thinking to extend my populist sensibility in a less fraught arena. Then, I sold out. I work for law firms. Not as though librarianism is ever going to make me any money. Hmm. I'm thinking it may be time to get back into the non-profit world. Thanks for kicking my thinking around, y'all.
  • How strong you must be to survive that Christophene. So much harder when cruelty dresses in the guise of love. More power to you.
  • The ex-boyfriend who did this is long since gone To HELL, I hope?
  • the "call" was for psych/counseling. ended up in law. gave up the big bucks to work for an ethical employer, but currently stuck doing uninspiring work. I'd settle for low money, high interest, good work, never mind heavy on all three. (example: I like environmental law, but if you like the environment, why would you want to spend all of your hours under fluorescent light? someone has to do it, I know and I'm grateful. just not me.) and reading the thread, I see that I'm not the only one who had law school as a backup plan (if even that)
  • Big, big ups to Christophine.
  • I recently took a job which I knew counted as selling out (project management in sales and marketing at a television website). And regretted it - I was consulting before, and though there were ups and downs, in general I was getting most of my work from the same company that hired me. After I took the job I was getting offers of interesting and well-paid consulting work pretty regularly all of a sudden. So I quit 3 months after taking the job. And I've got a really good contract close to home (previous job was 1.5hr commute, current commute is 15 mins) that pays better and is much more interesting. Time will tell if I made a terrible mistake - accepting this job and then quitting it very likely lost me one loyal client. But right now I wouldn't mind taking a month or two off :)