January 22, 2004
Could Lesbians Destroy Your Mortgage? Daily Mail random headline generator.
I like the David Blunkett policy generator, too.
Give Liberal Democrat voters a 'Citizenship Test', and then give them an on-the-spot fine.
Disturbingly accurate.
Another Blunkett policy:
Lock children up, and then detain them indefinitely under the Terrorism Act.
And a wonderful mail headline:
COULD PAEDOPHILES LEAD THE CONSERVATIVES ASTRAY?
Man, those are almost perfect.
WILL TONY BLAIR GIVE BRITISH SOVEREIGNTY CANCER?
"WILL THE LEFT STRIP THE MIDDLE CLASS OF ALL DIGNITY?"
The first one I ever got was "Are Paedophiles Killing The Countryside?". And dammit, it's still my favourite.
Will Alastair Campbell Infect The Countryside With AIDS? is good too, though.
I feel extraordinarily full of bananas at this being posted - a mate of mine's been MonkeyFiltered... I'd have done it myself, exept I forgot. Can I just say instead that the guy who made this also cooks the finest hangover-curing fry-up in the entire western world? Can I? Thankyou.
"COULD CHANNEL 4 CHEAT THE MEMORY OF DIANA AGAIN?"
"COULD TEENAGE SEX LEAD THE POLICE ASTRAY?"
"COULD GAYS IMPREGNATE BRITISH JUSTICE?"
It's could-could-could with never a naughty cancan.
Oh, and:
Michael Howard goes Morrissey.
COULD IMMIGRANTS KILL THE CHURCH?
DOES TONY BLAIR DESTROY YOUR DAUGHTERS?
Blair: (evil voice) Destroy their daughterrrss...... muahahhaahahaha!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!
Ok, I'm good.
COULD CHERIE BLAIR IMPREGNATE MICHAEL HOWARD?
And the ultimate Blunkett policy:
Deport everyone to Guantanamo Bay, and then detain them indefinitely under the Terrorism Act.
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