November 08, 2004

• I wanted to be a nun. Seriously. I could not be further from that (for which my husband is thankful). Then I wanted to be a geologist. Then I wanted to be psychologist. I've pretty much stayed with that one.
• I wanted to write lame-ass comments on a blog. And play the bass.
• I wanted to be in the army. I used to crawl through jungle gyms without using my left leg, or right arm or whatever, pretending it had been shot off. *shudder* Then I got over that and wanted to be a fashion designer.
• Town drunk. And well, there I am.
• (I also had episodes of wanting to become a programmer or translator, but I got over that)
• Town drunk. And well, there I am. *applauds some more*
• I wanted to be a fire engine.
• I wanted to be a pilot. Then a zoologist, then a pathologist (cutting up dead people sounded like fun), then a mechanical engineer, then a preacher. With the death of my vocation (along with the death of my soul, according to my friends), my ambitions died, and I decided to do whatever I could to keep my family and me in beer fed.
• I wanted to be like one of those kids in that old movie, Village of the Damned -all glowing eyeballs, shiny blond, neatly dressed and heartless as hell. It took some doing but here I am.
• *goes off-line now after being an ass* I wanted to meet Tracy Hope.
• Happy.
• and so, lamearse...?
• Smurfette. I'm still disappointed to this day. Okay, and I also wanted to be a vet, singer, actress, teacher, librarian, nanny, college professor, international netballer, primatologist, zookeeper, and funeral director. Don't ask why the last one, I was three.
• I wanted to be a dragon. But now I'm a dohicken.
• > wanted to be a nun. posted by Darshon Funny. I wanted to be a monk. To me, it involved reading books and living away from people, which suited me perfectly. Now, the only problem, of course, was that those were boring books.
• I wanted to be an astrynort! Then I wanted to be an expert. Not an expert in anything in particular; just an expert.
• Oh yes, for a while I wanted to be an "Ologist". So that I could wear a white coat.
• I wanted to be a mermaid. Then a doctor. (I used to read medical books for fun. No, seriously.) Now I just want to not be a hack when I get out of college.
• Zanshin: I wanted to be a dolphin, but likewise failed. Later I wanted to Understand The Universe, but then after learning more physics than was good for me I began to realise that there is only so long one can spend calculating nuclear scattering cross sections, and I also began to have Godel-related doubts about the plausibility of Grand Unified Theories and other doubts about their ability to be at all satisfying in the way that, say, a good shit is. Now I am unemployed.
• I wanted to be a marine biologist. A very specific goal, but one that I held onto with fierce determination from the age of about four to the age of ten. Then it occurred to me that writing funny stuff for a living would be easier, less wet, more fun and potentially much better paid. I'm still working on that.
• Didn't know what I wanted to be when I was a kid and I still don't now I am 55. The whole working thing looks like shit to me.
• A builder. Given my inordinate ineptness when it comes to handling physical objects, I'm relieved that I never became one. The lives that have been saved thanks to the growth in computers in the last 20 years is shudderingly high.
• Psychologist, then lawyer, then restaurant owner.
• LIke zqwerty, I had no idea, however rock star was pretty high on the list. Having tried that, and falling far short of the goal, I haven't a clue. I"m 40 years old and trying to decide. I think right now I'd settle for any job. Any fucking job.
• A guest on The Muppet Show. Then a private detective (all those Nancy Drew and Trixie Beldens). Then a nurse, then a doctor (all those kids' nurse novels). Then a writer (because I figured out what I really liked was the novels).
• I second flashboy's comment - marine biology all the way. People still ask me why I have a whole shelf of books on fish, which I collected furiously between about the same ages (4-10). Hey flashboy, what was your favorite fish? I was a total devotee to the gulper eel.
• Talk show host. Still want to be.
• I wanted to be an airplane pilot, but then I realized that I don't like flying. I now need tranquilizers just to get on an airplane, which is lots of fun because I love to travel. I'm not sure if I'm afraid of flying itself or being in a confined space with a bunch of idiots.
• I wanted to be Luke Skywalker: flying a spaceship, fighting the Bad Guys (mostly it was flying the spaceship I wanted). It wasn't until I was twelve or thirteen that I realized that wasn't likely to happen, and felt for the first time that I was "born too early." Which I sometimes still do, although my iPod almost makes up for it.
• An indian. So much cooler than the cowboys.
• At a particular miniscule age, I was strangely affected by the talk of high unemployment rates in my country. I was mollified after realising that there was a sure way to be fed and housed in adulthood: I could become a Priest! Or, I could go to prison!
• For as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a writer, and that hasn't changed. I also really wanted to be a teacher. But all of my teachers kept telling me I could do so much better than that... so I'm something worse.
• Rogue Trooper.
• i've never had specific goals, but my husband, when he was about 7, wanted to be a scientist and study erosion on the moon
• At a very young age, I had dreams of being something heroic, like Wonder Woman. After seeing Xanadu, I wanted to be a roller-skating muse.
• Loved.
• An oceanographer or geologist. Then while watching Portrait of Eddie's Father I saw the character Rubin who was a hipster photographer. As soon as I got into high school I was in photography classes and got my degree in photography at Cal Arts. Now I work in video graphics and film and video production.
• A vet, a writer, a cowgirl, a biomedical researcher, a drum major. Ended up studying art and now in my 30's I'm studying nursing. My boyfriend and I were just talking about this - he wanted to work at a gas station and squeegee people's car windows. He loves doing that.
• For my whole childhood I was determined to become a veterinarian. Having grown up on a farm it isn't that shocking I suppose. Unfortunately I sort of forgot that you have to work hard in highschool to do those sorts of things. It's so annoying that your parents are right about so many things but you don't realise it until too late. Luckily I have worked as a vet assistant (in surgery etc.) which has fulfilled my need for looking into the insides of creatures. *twinkle*twinkle*
• Make that "Norman" in "The Courtship of Eddie's Father". Just checked IMDB.
• always been undecided....and I still don't know what to do.
• I also wanted to be a veterinarian, then I wanted to be an alien anthropologist... as in studying the cultures and rituals of space aliens (I watched a little too much "In Search Of" as a kid). Now I am striving for the career of "Socialite Philanthropist". Things don't seem to be panning out much on that one though.
• Astronaut. Then came math.
• When I was very little, I wanted to be Reggie Jackson. Not *like* him, but *him*. When I found out that would be impossible, I decided to be a utility infielder for the Yankees. Then I wanted to be President, then an archaeologist. When I found out that there aren't any bathrooms at archaeological digs, I decided to become an academic.
• A cop, but I'm too lazy. Now, I'm just happy I have a job.
• A cop, but I'm too lazy. Now, I'm just happy I have a job.
• the meh - Ocean Sunfish, all the way. Crazy-ass fish. Just drifts around slowly in tropical seas not doing very much, so its lifestyle has aspirational qualities for me too.
• I wanted to play right wing for the Toronto Maple Leafs. I didn't...and that's why they've never won the Stanley Cup since 1967.
• Initially, I wanted to be a groupie, but I couldn't decide on a band. Then I wanted to be a teacher. Now I want to be retired.
• I wanted to ride motorcycles for a living, or be a race car driver. Well I am a RN and a Biker. I make no money for myself with the bike, but I have a lot of fun. I love my job. I am continuing my education, one day I would like to teach nursing.
• Listening to some of the L.A. radio legends of the '60s and '70s (Robert W. Morgan, Gary Owens, Lohman & Barkley, Emperor Hudson, etc.), I wanted to be a Morning Disc Jockey. Through extraordinary perseverence (including allowing myself to become the running joke of "Wendell on Hold"), I ended up as assistant/sidekick to underrated genius "Sweet" Dick Whittington (yes, they called him "Sweet Dick" on the air in the '70s), but in a post-graduate misjudgement, left to use my Business Degree running a small radio station in Central California. Ever since, I've been looking for a lazy man's way to express my creativity. Toward that end, the web has been a blessing. Which reminds me, I have to finish my "overrateds" article today. Talk to ya later!
• Another former marine biologist wannabe here. My dad was an entomologist and my mum was a librarian, so geek childhood all the way (two favorite toys were a globe and an enormous dictionary). I also wanted to be an archaeologist, a veterinarian, zoologist, paleontologist, animal behaviorist, astronaut, writer, lawyer, violinist and filmmaker. And that's the short list. Since I can't be an independently-wealthy Edwardian-era dilettante, I try to write about stuff on the web and get paid for it. Mostly keeps me in scotch.
• I wanted to be a Solid Gold dancer. I was 4. Failing that, I wanted to be Wonder Woman. When I was 10, I wanted to be, in order: a lawyer, a fashion designer, a nun, a librarian, and a writer. I stuck with writer for a few years. Then I decided to be a mother/homeschooler/houseperson/writer somewhere right before or during college. I've got that one down pretty well, except for the writing part. =P
• When I was 10, I decided to become a geneticist, and haven't wavered since. Not that I knew anything about genetics at that age. What I really wanted was to be smart. And as I understood it, the smartest people were geneticists and rocket scientists. I thought NASA was stupid, spending all that money to go where there is nothing and nobody can breathe, so genetics was the obvious choice. Luckily, my best teachers in high school and college were in math and biology, so nothing bumped genetics from the top spot. Psychology had a shot, but I didn't want to end up spending too much time with unhappy people.
• I wanted to be a funny dentist. Largely because my dentist at the time was funny. And I idolized him. Then I realized I didn't want to be a funny dentist. I wanted to be a movie star. When it became clear I had little in the way of acting talent, I wanted to be a documentary filmmaker, traveling the world. I'm currently a documentary filmmaker, but I don't much travel the world - its too expensive.
• When I was a child I wanted to be God - in fact until I was three, I thought I was. Anyway, every job I've had as an adult, no matter how cool, always seems inadequate.
• I had no idea what the hell i wanted to be, while my best friend at primary school wanted to be an 'engineer' - i was amazed that he was so certain, and wondered how he came to make a choice that sounded so serious. He went to be something in IT last i heard, which is the equiv' in some form or other. It wasn't till i was 20 or something that "being in charge of a design studio" seemed to appeal, and lo that came to pass - for a while, and what with the prevelance of digital media somehow, now, people tend to think i am 'something in IT'! Perhaps i should have said robo-pirate.
• a paleontologist. i must've known that word since kindergarten. dinosaurs are the shit.
• I wanted to be a baseball player. Then, for a brief period, I wanted to be a violinist, until I realized you had to be not-totally-sucky at it, then a computer programmer, which I guess is sort of what I am now.
• A doctor, first. Then a puppeteer. Jim Henson was my idol until I was about 20. I cried like a baby when I watched the Muppet special that aired right after he died. I actually did earn money as a puppeteer for a few years, although serious puppeteers like Noel MacNeal probably wouldn't consider what I did real puppeteering.
• A musician until I took piano lessons (thanks, Grandmother). A succession of bad teachers and one good one who came too late pretty much killed that desire for 10 years or so. Since then I've wanted to work with computers and be an actor. One out of two is 50%. Actually, I do write some music - none of it very good or memorable, but at least I am trying. It's posted on my site, if anyone is interested. I'll leave it to you to figure out how to get there.
• first i wanted to be a stand-up comedian. then, for a short time, a lawyer. ever since i was 14 i knew i wanted to be a journalist. i guess that splits the difference. heh.
• a truck driver (7), a ballerina (11ish), an archaeologist (14, coincidentally the year Raiders of the Lost Ark came out....hmmm...) now I would like to be the winner of a huge lottery living a life of international decadence....
• I was in kindergarten, and I knew that I wanted to be a scientist, a skydiver, a martial arts expert, a computer genius, a robot maker, programmer of artificial intelligence, scuba diver, investigator and astronaut. I also wanted to have my own newspaper, and to that end I founded and edited a small weekly with a full two runs of two copies each. Now I have a blog, pretty much the same. I still want to be an astronaut. Soon, my preciousss, soon!
• Throught childhood (and into early adulthood): Paleontologist, herpetologist, entomologist, ecologist, botanist, geneticist, assorted other -ists. 10 to 13: Shortstop for the Mets or point guard for the Knicks. 14: porn star.
• When I was 5 or 6, I wanted to be a bus driver, driving around the streets of our (then) small city, picking up people and taking them for rides. We lived on a bus route and I remember sitting on the front lawn with my tricycle turned on it's side, prentending the front wheel was the big ol' steering wheel of a bus. Whenever a bus went by I'd wave deliriously and sometimes the bus driver would smile and wave back. Later, I too wanted to be a marine biologist but I have somehow evolved into an IT geek who would rather be doing something else. Wealthy intinerant philanthropist sounds good.
• All the pressure!!! If people don't stop asking me what I want to be when I grow up, I'm gonna be a god damned psycho! Oh, um, dictator of a West African country?
• When I was 5, I wanted to be a cowboy. Veterinary medicine always did interest me, and I seriously think with any encouragement, I could have been a super equine specialist. But in my teen years/young twentys, teen-aged lust and the Catholic Church convinced me I needed to be a housewife with four kids and a rose-covered cottage. I got the four kids. I gave up on vet med. Now I'm 50. But I still want to be a cowboy.
• I wanted to be a lawyer. I was cured of that by a stint as a paralegal. Actually, I think I'd be OK in a corporate (or non-profit) legal setting so I didn't have to hustle for clients, but it's a lot of work to get into a profession where the number of applicants already exceeds the number of jobs.
• I'm 37 and I still want to be a spaceship captain, though. One with a cool name. And my ship would have a cool name, too. And lots of hot alien chicks with cool names. I'm so lonely ...
• from 1981 to now (in order): computer programmer, geneticist, science fiction writer, poet, photographer, poet, english professor, german professor, new economy tech geek, planner.
• Proffesional Geek. Which is what I am.
• I wanted to be an environmental scientist when I was about seven or so, and I wanted to go to MIT. Currently, I don't really have any plans for my future (well, maybe something to do with writing or painting or...something). My mother, on the other hand, would like me to become a journalist in France/spy/opera singer/ski instructor.
• One of my good friends wanted to be a unicorn when she was small. The next year, she wanted to be more realistic, and decided to be a horse.
• One of my good friends wanted to be a unicorn when she was small. The next year, she wanted to be more realistic, and decided to be a horse. Goddammit! You made me snort coke through my nose! that kind of coke>
• ...through...meaning 'out'.
• I'd chime in but I'm a little horse today.
• *pats little horse* Wanted to be a sorceroress. Cast magic, live in a big scary castle, the works. Except for the cleavage baring clothes. Then I thought being an academic seemed quite all right. But ivory towers are toppling left and right, so I gave that up. I want to be a librarian. I love being at the reference desk, talking to people, checking things out. But my real fantasy is to be rich enough to own a small house, and a bookshop-cum-teahouse in some small sleepy town, and just watch life go by.
• A spy. And a nun. A spy-nun. Then a marine biologist, a linguist, and a spy.
• I wanted first to be a magician, and later to be a comedian (inspired, believe it or don't, by Fozzy Bear on the Muppet Show). As a 12 year old my life's ambition was to be a professional wrestler. From about 13 on, novelist. I'm still trying to get over that one.
• Despot. I really thought I'd be better at running the world than the politicians. My inherent laziness is the only thing stopping me at this point. Note to self: Zombies are getting hungry. Must either feed or release back into wild.
• I was going to be a doctor (thanks, Dad) until I worked in an emergency room and figured out that probably 45% of the population is quite crazy, which explains the most recent election. Currently, I'm a corporate whore worker. I'd like to open a place that sells wine and cheese, and maybe independent art, but I'm high on the security that corporate whoring working provides.
• Only things I remember were fireman, toy store owner, astronomer, priest [VERY BRIEFLY - I was an altar boy and went to Catholic school all my life, give me a break], and veternarian.
• So, out of all of us poor sods that were raised Catholic and/or attended Catholic school who were deluded enough to believe they wanted to grow up to be nuns/priests, did any of us ever actually join a religious order? And how many of religious persons are now Monkeyfilter subscribers? Uh hunh. That's what I thought. And what does this tell us?
• a. We're all godless commies. b. We're pitiful apostates lost in a mad, meaningless world. c. There should be some good altar boy/priest jokes on the way.
• I tried to think of a joke or two, but came up with nun.