THE BIG FAT THREAD FOR THE ELECTIONS
It hasn't started yet, but I thought that I'd put this thing up.
Post here with running commentary about the vote count, voting irregularities, etc...
First thing this morning, you are made aware of a groundswell of activity that benefits you. This powerful locomotive is unstoppable and likely to outperform everyone's expectations. Even so, you will experience moments of uncertainty from time to time — but not for long. The best information indicates that your momentum is irreversible. You feel very popular and beloved most of the day. Even another's petty criticism is too limp to hit a bullseye. Enormous changes that you've hoped for — perhaps your own personal miracle — can occur.
You comfort others, especially this morning, and take the attitude that, no matter what, things will turn out fine. Your apparent acceptance creates comfort, strength and unity among friends and loved ones. Throughout the day, you can feel the future quickly approaching your front door. You anticipate change, travel or even moving, and feel at peace with the prospect. In fact, you begin to welcome the likelihood of change. Once you're able to step outside of preconceived notions and expectations, you're able to see the peace and beauty inherent in a new way of living.
I think the stars just called it for Kerry.
Go Nader!
Last time I encountered a pony, it threw me off. You will have to personalise your inducements, tracicle.
All right monkeys, I've got the coffee and Krispy Kremes ready for my precinct team tomorrow. (They promoted me to vanilla election official to assistant chief, so I gotta spread the love that $25 pay raise merits). My chief has put me in charge of crowd control--so none o' youse monkeys better be electioneering in my line. Because my line is your line, and your line deserves to be free and peaceful.
And turn off your cell phones.
But get out and vote.
This might be the last you hear from me for 12 hours noble monkeys, as soon as I can get back here, I will post my journal entries for the day if I don't before, kind of a like a time-delay blog from the eyes of a vote counter.
Wish me and especially all the officials in Ohio and Florida luck.
And did I mention get out and vote?
Rock, rock on!
On a personal note, I'd like to send a big fuck you to the soon jobless George W. Bush.
BearGuy, I am working the banks here in La-La land tomorrow from 9-12 noon.
May we all awake from that ugly rarebit/petrol fueled dream tomorrow.
electiondrinkinggame.com
Come on, we can do better than that. I'm going to take a big swig of Chimay every time Dan Rather says "shakier than cafeteria Jell-O". Or at least I would if I could get CBS election coverage here.
fuyugare, I think that Horoscope means that Bush is going to come out as gay in the next 12 hours.
Oh, and a Fox news affiliate in India was reporting sightings of bin Laden earlier today... but, no. Surely they wouldn't... nah. Hmmm.
tracicle - since this is a meritocracy, I think you'd get 100% of the vote.
Bear Guy and squidranch - my heroes!
Argh - from your lips to god's ears - I'm sure which ever one in in charge of elections has heard the f-word before.
And, for those of you who favor GWB, no matter who wins, we'll still be buddies once the counting is over, whichever way it goes.
The advanced societies of the future will not be governed by reason. They will be driven by irrationality, by competing systems of psychopathology. --JG Ballard
Tomorrow we find out if we're there yet.
Everyone be sure and vote for the rich white guy.
I'll be giving you regular updates on the election news in my alternate universe. Could McCain's late surge be enough to kick Gore out of the White House? There's a new Zogby poll for the Washington Post-Fark which puts them neck-and-neck, although most other polls still give Gore a slight lead. Could the events of 9/10 be coming back to haunt Gore? More news as I get it...
I hope tracicle has the foresight to start an election thread when the polls open on the east coast of the US. It's gonna be a crazy 24 hours from here on in.
Is this 'election' something you need a T.V. to know about?
No Nickdanger, keep your ear to the tracks. You'll hear the train as it comes. Just remember to look up.
It's gettin' hot in here/so take off all your clothes...
*casts ballot for tracicle* Hup hup, dear leader!
I'm already sick to my stomach. Doesn't help that I have a major project due Wednesday, have to work tomorrow morning, and then clean the house for the huge party we're throwing. Well, being busy means I can't fret too much, right? If only...
(And I'm not even in the US - c'mon, American monkeys, get out and vote and make me a happy girl...)
So far it's still tied...0 to 0.
I'll check back in an hour...
Oh my god I just had a nightmare that I was back in high school and there was a tough ballot that I had forgotten to study for and if I didn't vote right my country would be destroyed and I was naked and everyone was looking at me and oh my god everyone knew I was gay and couldn't marry my partner and adopt any children and there was an aborted fœtus in my booth and it was crying "you killed me!!!" *pant pant*
I just want to wish you good luck, we're all counting on you.
Fox just called it for Bush.
/kidding, sorta
I walk into the polling station
I'm pulling the rod
All unnecessary histories erased
I am a punditing god!
Swiiing state Whiskey!
/Buckley
I'm already nervous, too! Oh, I wish it were already over. I've already cancelled my class on Wednesday. I'm pretty sure the only way to get through tomorrow night is to be rather tipsy....
Good luck, everyone
OMG, little green footballs endorses Bush in a last minute surprise move! This is huge! Completely unexpected! Bush will now win in a landslide!!
PS, the best part of Kerry's victory will be watching these fuckers squirm. They are already busting out the bad poetry. Someone get Turkmenbashi an LGF account.
Dr. Phil (if you can call him that) is on NBC with Jay Leno.
All hell HAS FROZE OVER if this hack is on late night selling his insane shit.
Because of this, I predict Bush will win. There, I had my say.
Hopefully I am wrong. This is not a troll.
I Am not a TRooollllooollll....
God those LGF threads make my blood boil. Just when you think you can start to understand the mindset of some conservatives (ie. f8x, Fes, et. al) I read that utter bile and it makes me even sicker. I'm ready for this election to be over with, regardless of the winner. I've done what I can do, now to sit back and hope for the best.
Oh come on, genial. Don't let it get to you. Remember, the joke's on them. We're supposed to laugh at them. Here, start with this comment about "honest to God" incidents of Democrats throwing skunks into Republican strongholds. Then read this comment about how one of them becomes non-functional unless they are listening to talk radio and Fox News at the same time! Then read this superb analysis of how Michael Moore, Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton are Marxist-Communists. See? Let yourself laugh out loud. It's the correct, healthy reaction. How can you get angry at these clowns?
"I don't understand why we have to build a ray gun to aim at a planet I never even heard of"
"Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos."
Hoping this doesn't become part of reality anytime soon, as other twisted, impossible, insane events recently have. Have a nice election, voters.
Point taken fuyugare, it's just posts like this one that make me wonder. I won't be able to laugh at the stuff til this nightmare is over I'm afraid.
The axis of hard liquor. That's what I'm a member of tomorrow night. I can't take this shit.
Kerry, with 300+ electoral votes.
Failing a Kerry victory, a surreal period of trying to come to grips with the fact that I live in a country that has forsaken reason.
Hey American Monkeys, what do you do when you've got equally qualified candidates to choose from? Specifically, district court judicial candidates. Three seats, three incumbents with solid experience and impeccable endorsements, versus three challengers with same and same. I'd be pleased to see any of them win. What's your philosophy on new blood vs. old faithful?
tracicle don't need no stinkin' election! She's the bashi ain't she?
I've always regarded Americans as good friends and neighbors. Sure, sometimes their leaders suck and they get get a little loud and obnoxious at times. But I think the majority of the American people are wise and decent and, like all of us, are just doing their best to get through this life. So, tomorrow I'm pretty sure they'll make the right choice.
I wish them good fortune and peace.
Now bring it on!
I've said this before and nobody agreed with me, but I'd rather people didn't link to LGF. Or that other nicedoggie shit, Emperor of Poo, Misha Bag of Fuck. It only encourages them.
I don't expect anybody to agree with me now either, but, you know.
Hey American Monkeys
sorry, I'm stupid-tired and my addled brainstem didn't compute in time that non-American monkeys would probably have fabulous insight into this question as well.
I would like to say something to my fellow Americans, sorry if it's a bit trite but:
Vote. Vote vote vote.
Your vote matters very much. There will be more poeple than ever before working very hard to see that every vote is counted. "Government of the people, by the people, and for the people" is one of the great ideas in human history. Yes there have been a few hiccups along the way, but it WORKS. It's our government. We decide.
shinything: as a non-american i must say that i have no insight at all into this one
Some judges are elected, but federal judges (and Supreme Court) are appointed and subsequently confirmed.
and while i'm at it, can't you have your elections in a decent timezone? it's eight o'clock on tuesday night and there are still no results.
Jesus, where do you live? Easter Island? :p
There are countries where the age of consent is 12 (though likely with stipulations that the other party be no older than X)
Man, I can't believe that Bush and Kerry are at each other's throats this way. It's not cool at all. Tell you what, let Kerry win the election he wants to win so badly. OK senator, you won. Great job! As for Bush, let him win the presidency he so craves. That sounds like a fair compromise, right? That way each candidate has won half the prize and we can all be happy.
My fellow citizens, Flashboy wants you to look at pictures of kittens. But an election is about choice, and I hope you will join me in making the right< choice--the proper choice--the only choice Americans can afford to make. In short, I hope you will join me in looking at pictures of puppies instead.
The hell did that comment end up here, that was supposed to go under pitcairn. Now it's going to look like I only ever think about sex with 12 yr olds.
Um... Vote!
Voted. PA leads 1-0 for Kerry. Yay.
I would also like to record for posterity that I posted the horoscope thing here long before it was FPP'd on the blue internets. Therefore, I am not the unrepentant copycat. Thanks for your listening and good day.
if you've already voted, or if you want to practise voting, ... or ...
as a non-usian, i find both these sites satisfy my current urge to express preferences. it's almost like i'm involved in the big day.
Please, please, please just let the brewing legal disputes in Florida, Ohio, Nevada, Pennsylvania, Colorado, Oregon and wherever else just CALM the feck down. Please let the winner hold such a margin that all challenges are rendered moot. Please put me out of my misery.
kittens? puppies? whichever you choose, a quadruped still gets in. why not stand up for who you are and what you really believe in? why not put your monkey where your mouth is? why not choose naderchimpanzine?
the_bone: i am not quite as backward as the island of the day before.
something strange went wrong with that last bit. please don't let it distract you from voting.
i want my friend's mom to win coroner
i voted for a libertarian because he was dating a friend
while most everyone gets to vote across the street, i think i have to go across town
it take two more minutes in a car
i think my not bush shirt is going on a scarecrow in the front yard
or the first drunk i find in the yard
red, blue and green jello shots free with a "i voted" sticker!
drop by!
pick a flavor!
take a rose!
make some bread!
hold me, i'm frightened
I dunno about you monkeys, but on this island people are lined up around the block to vote. It's pretty schweet. I heard on the radio that people had slept in front of the polling place to vote first.
*salutes*
Aaaannnnd here's the vote . . . it's back to the pitcher! He flips to the first baseman! and THE RED SOX ARE WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!
I, petebest, do solemnly swear that after a Kerry victory I will, to the best of my ability, party so excellently hearty, and to dance like it t'were 1999 again. So hope me Monkeybashi.
Well, my vote is in. No waiting, and the satisying THWAK of a lever voting machine. Now I just need to make it through a day of work. Interestingly enough, many people at my work took off today to go to PA to help get out the vote. I figured I did my part by hasseling my family in TN and MS (they all early voted). The rest of my evening will consist of imbibing heavily with friends on the Upper West Side.
Flip-Flop Times action flash report: Aerosmith drummer Joey Kramer says that the band will not play at Kerry's inaugural if he were to win.
In a related story, Larry Flynt promises to flee if Bush wins.
If Larry Flynt promises to flee, does that mean I'll never have to look at his Jabba the Hut mug again? That almost, ALMOST, makes me want Bush to win.
Well, I'm off to vote then to man the Kerry phone banks. Keep your fingers and toes crossed my simian friends.
I waited an hour and 15 minutes to vote this morning. By the time I left, people were lined up outside the building and around the corner, standing in the rain. I've never seen anything like it. In 20 years of voting, I've only ever had to wait 10 minutes tops to cast my ballot.
Reports are starting to trickle in through our grad student listserv of GOP "challengers" turning voters away at selected polls in town without offering the option of casting a provisional ballot (because we are a bass-ackwards state, Indiana is allowing "challengers" at the polls, whereas most other states have outlawed them, I believe). I just want this to be over with and I'd like the last 4 years back, please.
I've voted. It was a huge line of people that moved faster than I expected, but it still took an hour.
Two college guys in line behind me discussed their plans to drop a history class after skipping the midterm exam:
"That's the only class that's giving me any trouble."
"Dude, it's better than getting an F. Or a D."
"Yeah, I know."
I'm so proud of my country. Get out & vote!
Oh, and a Fox news affiliate in India was reporting sightings of bin Laden earlier today... but, no. Surely they wouldn't... nah. Hmmm.
Bin Laden is the new Bigfoot. I call him: BinFoot.
I went to vote first thing this morning. The line was long, but it only took about 30 to 45 mins., and by the time I left the morning rush was over and the line was very manageable. I'm really feeling so nervous about all this as to be almost queasy. The possibility that I might throw up from stress is very real. Kerry's got to win. He's just GOT to.
I was standing in line, watching the voters come out, and I was thinking to myself about each exiting voter--"Is that person good, or evil? Did she try to help the country, or hurt it? Does he look smart, or stupid?" AAAAACH! I just couldn't tell. It's driving me mad. I don't know how anybody's going to concentrate today.
Anyway, now I'm wearing my "I Voted" sticker, and directly below it my Kerry/Edwards button. I don't know if there's a company policy about political expression, but I'm sure someone will tell me if there is. I've had Kerry boosting paraphrenalia all over my cube for the past month, and no one's said anything, so I'm taking it all the way.
....And so it begins:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6364287/
(a state-by-state, regularly updated graphic of voter-complaint calls by state. as of 10:13am, Florida, DC and South Carolina are in the red.)
Flip-Flop Times action flash report: Aerosmith drummer Joey Kramer says that the band will not play at Kerry's inaugural if he were to win.
Then there is a God. PRAISE!
I have done my duty, after standing in line for a hour and a half. I remember in 2000 not waiting more than 15 minutes to vote at the same polling place. I also donated my umbrella to the soggy people in line. I think I may buy some more on my way back home.
Thanks cleverlittlename. Pennsylvania's red now, too.
Oh man, just walked by the local polling place on the way back from lunch. The line is just short of five blocks long. These people are gonna be taking a long lunch break.
Please don't be deterred by long lines, people! The one I was in this morning (150+) moved rather quickly (I was out in 25 minutes). If you're in Ohio, please don't be deterred by partisan challengers (there will be one from each permitted at each polling site as of this morning--the earlier ruling forbidding them was reversed).
...'challengers'?
*shakes head in puzzlement and quietly wanders off*
Dammit, now I wish I hadn't voted early. Not sure why I did, it's not like I have a job or anything better to do than stand in long ass lines for the good of our country.
I want to reiterate what cleverlittlename said. DO NOT BE DETERRED BY LONG LINES. It's important. It's once every 4 years. It's worth a day of your time. Bring snacks. Bring a book. Bring an etch-a-sketch, an iPod, a gameboy. JUST DO IT.
Besides, voting makes you sexy. It's da troof.
Elect me Monkeybashi for life! I promise ponies on an irregular basis!
posted by tracicle at 12:35AM UTC on November 02
Well, I hope you don't mind a seat as a Georgia State Representative. Because I just voted Monkeybashi for State House. Of course I voted Eugene V Debs for state senator so I hope you don't mind being second banana to a dead commie.
BTW, I'm not throwing my vote away (and really can a vote for the Monkeybashi ever be a waste?), those seats were both uncontested, and the incumbents are asshats.
long lines at 7 AM here in michigan. nobody challenging any votes that i could see, but they already had to call the cops in detroit, because four republicans were apparently harassing black voters. gotta love the grand old party, they sure stand for freedom and american values.
It's no secret the GOP is actively trying to supress voter turnout. The bigger the electorate the worse for them.
I live in Seattle in the Eastlake neighborhood, and one thing that's been missing is a Bush/Cheney campaign sign or signs. I was at the bus stop this morning and looked across at the traffic island and what do you know. Appeared like a thief in the night. . .
I'm voting for the correct choice, by the way, and it is not Bush.
I'm in a coffee shop right now and the patrons are buzzing with conversations about the election today.
Let's hope there's no shenanigans from the right today, but that's like asking for a snowball to have a chance in hell . . .
I voted this morning. I'm in Dallas. It was at 7:45 in a sleepy, white, politically moderate neighborhood. There were two people in line ahead of me, and maybe one more booth than usual. 84 people had voted when I put my fill-in-the-bubbles ballot in the machine. So it was maybe slightly more active than usual. There were no partisan challengers or even any political signs up whatsoever. We did get redistricted out of the congressperson we expected to vote for, and I had the pleasure of picking Libertarian judges over Republicans - if there's any place I like to see Libertarians it's in the judicial branch. Not that it'll do anything.
Take from that what you will...
Vote, dear Amerimonkeys, vote! Do yourselves, and the rest of the world, proud.
And what path so sensibly said above, no matter what the outcome, we'll all still be friends in the morning - go do your voting thing, and let's just get all of this over with already.
tiny prayer to any deity who may be listening: pleasepleaseplease let there be a clear-cut winner tomorrow pleasethankyou. (and also please send ponies to her supreme undisputed no-voting-necessary highness monkeybashi cos she deserves them pleasethankyou.)
I'm thinking of walking around the corner to vote in a few minutes, but I'm really a-scared of what all the mean Democratic trial lawyers that that traitor Kerry hired with his rich wife's money are going to do to me.
*looks at post from petebest -- not pete_best*
*rubs eyes, blinks*
*looks again*
*goes looking for a towel*
Oh fuck not another one.
;)
PETEBEST IS A TERRORIST!!!!
Voting absentee is soooo lame. I've been deprived of the wonders of the voting experience. I want to go to the local polling place of the Republican town where I am currently being held prisoner and give the evil eye to soccer moms who look like they're on the fence.
I can't wait to start my election drinking game which is: 1) start drinking when I can't take the tension anymore (I give myself an hour); and 2) stop drinking when incapacitated.
Democracy: what a racket.
I can't wait to start my election drinking game which is: 1) start drinking when I can't take the tension anymore (I give myself an hour); and 2) stop drinking when incapacitated.
That's my plan, too. I had thought I would be able to deal with my anxiety until later tonight, but I am pretty sure Beer will happen sooner than I had anticipated.
Hooray for Voting
even though the last time my state voted for a Democrat was FDR.
start drinking
It's obvious to me that this Democracy thing is just one of those fake "holidays" manufactured by the Alcohol industry, like Mother's Day and Christmas.
Right. I'm off to have a nice, convivial, relaxing meal, a bottle or two of wine, then with nibbles and wine to watch the coverage of the beginning of the end of the world. Oh, and drink wine. Lots of it. American monkeys - my thoughts are with you during the coming fiasco.
I just want to tell all 294,663,439 of you, good luck.
We're all counting on you.
I voted around 8 this morning, and there was a significantly longer line than the last time I voted in that district, though it only went for about 20 minutes. I was itchin for a fight, and I had my iPod set to record any challenges that came my way, but they let me in, I voted, and left with nary a problem. It's enough to dishearten a man. It would probably have helped had I some serious ethnicity to me one way or another, but a white male of european descent just isn't getting the lack of respect that he should. Ah, well.
I'm in Minneapolis, urban, residential, mostly lefty neighborhood. We went to vote at about 11:30. We had to register (MN does same-day voter registration at the polls) and we were still finished in about 30 minutes. The polling station was busy enough, but there were no lines. One of the officials said they were super busy early this morning, and they registered a ton of new voters.
*crosses fingers, wonders if it's too early to start drinking*
As might have been predicted, dial-up monkeys are already hopeless wrt this thread.
Ack! According to Zogby's latest polls, It's a complete tie, with Virginia and Pennsylvania deciding the race. And I know Northern Virginia is going craaaaaazy with voting fever, and they're the democratic concentration in VA. It's very exciting.
Voted. Thrice. I'm the only person in my house who actually researches the issues, so my roommates just copy my answers.
There was no line, but 48 people had voted by 8am (huge turnout compared to previous elections). The poll workers said they were seeing more young folks than they were used to. Of course, they think I'm a young folk when I'm nearly tridecadal, but still, a good sign.
smooth vote for me- i live in alameda county in CA, which has electronic machines. i requested a paper ballot, was handed one and directed to a booth (2 writing booths vs 6 e-booths) to fill in my choices. I kept my stub, put the ballot in the box and got an "i voted" sticker like everyone else. ironically i am a major geek gadget-head, but for this election, i want a paper trail for my ballot.
It's a complete tie, with Virginia and Pennsylvania deciding the race. And I know Northern Virginia is going craaaaaazy with voting fever, and they're the democratic concentration in VA.
So Zogby thinks my vote matters here in NoVA? Huh. Ponderous. Good thing my dog voted too.
Litigation update: Republicans in Florida's Seminole County have won a temporary injunction that will keep Democrats from distributing materials that intimidated GOP poll watchers.
In fliers and phone calls directed at the poll watchers, Florida Democrats said that state law requires a poll worker to explain in writing and under oath the basis of a polling-place challenge, and noted that it is a crime to "intimidate, threaten ... any person for the purpose of interfering with the right of such person to vote."
The court ordered the Democratic defendants to stop "further dissemination of these materials ... designed or intended to intimidate or unduly threaten the activities of poll watchers who are duly carrying out their responsibilities granted in Florida statutes."
Yeah, don't tell folks what their rights are. It's un-UhMerkian.
Ugh. I really can't take the suspense. I'm going to break out the booze at 5:00 PM sharp.
Name That Itch, despite what my girlfriend thinks, the Virginia Election has been close for the past several months. Aggregate polling has indicated that there's a 4% difference between Bush and Kerry in the current race, and we do have 13 electoral votes. I've surprised several people by telling them how close it is. For some reason, people assume that Virginia is clearly Republican in this race, when that's not true at all. Let's hope we show them properly when the tallying time arrives.
early polling results...
Subject: early exit polls
2pm exit poll report
take this with a grain of salt, but the numbers look very good for Kerry.
AZ CO LA PA OH FL MI NM MN WI IA NH
Kerry 45 48 42 60 52 51 51 50 58 52 49 57
Bush 55 51 57 40 48 48 47 48 40 43 49 41
I'm recommending a columnar format, SideDish. That shit's making my eyes cross. ;)
will do tenacious!
Sandspider, I think a Virginia win would be stunning. I don't put much stock in polls, but one can hope.
A 60-40 split in PA would be stunninger.
Some Arkansas Dems are making noise about the possibility of the Natural State going for Kerry. While that would be awesome, I'm not counting on it. However, if Arkansas DOES go Kerry, I think you can ring the bell, as it will likely mirror nationwide trends.
That would be the coolest.
*Visualizes Winning*
*temporarily visualizes quidnunc in a dunking booth with a fastball headed straight for the target . . . then goes back to visualizing winning*
update: some controversy as to whether those are actual polling numbers or gender-specific polling. but word leaked from polling folks is, news is good for kerry bad for bush.
I do not believe it. I refuse. I refuse. * visualizes losing, drinking *
well of course exit polls this early are VERY likely to change...
I just returned from voting. There were so many damn offices up for grabs, that I actually somehow did not vote for US Senate.
If the Bowles/Burr is decided by one vote or less, then I give Sidedish permission to remove 2/3 of my genitalia.
Y'know, the timing of this election dealy seems awfully convenient. It's taking focus away from our rabid Bush-hatred. I blame Ashcroft and/or Karl Rove for this one...
I don't recall waiting in lines in last year's election. Thankfully I went semi-early, so I got in and out within 20 minutes.
Doh, that should be last election, not last year's election.
Well I'm posting all over the place!
: )
Here is one guy who apparently figure it out early: Jimmy Breslin (his final column?). A must read.
Partisan snarkiness aside, I felt pretty good about going to vote today, and seeing so many people in line waiting patiently to do the same. I've talked to a couple of friends who felt the same--just pride in being part of the process, getting out there and trying to DO something, and seeing that other people care about the country too. One of those Lee Greenwood moments, if you know what I mean. The big voter turnout is fantastic, and I hope it continues. We're ALL supposed to participate, you know. ;)
during this lull in incoming poll activity, as we pause to ponder bernockle's genitals, here also are some kittens for your perusal.
also please cue theme song from "jeopardy!" as we continue to patiently wait.
our rabid Bush-hatred
Wow, I didn't know you hated Bush rabidly too! Is this recent? If so welcome! And congratulations!
From Slate:
Early Exit
A squeaker!
By Jack Shafer
Updated Tuesday, Nov. 2, 2004, at 12:51 PM PT
The first wave of exit-poll data reaching my desk comes from a variety of sources. In some states the sources disagree about the specific margin by which a candidate leads, but never about which candidate is out in front. Some of the confusion may stem from the mixing of morning exit-poll numbers with early afternoon numbers. With those provisos and the understanding that the early numbers are predictive of nothing without their accompanying computer model, here's what I've heard:
Florida
Kerry 50
Bush 49
Ohio
Kerry 50
Bush 49
Pennsylvania
Kerry 54
Bush 45
Wisconsin
Kerry 51
Bush 46
Michigan
Kerry 51
Bush 47
Minnesota
Kerry 58
Bush 40
Nevada
Kerry 48
Bush 50
New Mexico
Kerry 50
Bush 48
North Carolina
Kerry 49
Bush 51
Colorado
Kerry 46
Bush 53
Other exit-poll results have arrived in more vague form, with Kerry leading Bush in New Hampshire but trailing him in Arizona and Louisiana.
Okay, back to the partisan snarkiness now: \/\/007!!!!oneone!!!!
;)
The 'p' in 'partisan snarkiness' is entirely unnecessary. We're creating works of art here, people!
I just returned from voting. There was absolutely no line at all. I was rather disappointed. I had broughts snacks and a gameboy.
My polling place was taking care of 2 districts. I did some fuzzy counting of all the names on the lists, and came up with approximately 3500 total registered voters for the two districts, split pretty evenly. Out of the ~1900 in my district, I was the 322nd to drop my ballot in the counting machine.
There was electronic voting machine there, and something went wrong with it and they had to shut it down. I was in the booth closest to it, and I heard them trying to figure out what to do about the machine. They were looking all over it for a number to call for service/advice.
That's cool the electronic voting machine went out of order, as it forces more people to use paper ballot. But it also has the potential to be very shitty (since votes are/were stored in it, and it crashed).
Voted last night, left my ballot in a drop box. Voting in Oregon is as easy as you make it, since you get a ballot 2-3 weeks in advance. About to go see a movie, then commence drinking.
This is much easier than watching the Red Sox in the playoffs, but I learned lessons from that, namely, it's much easier to start watching the game in the 8th inning. Much easier to stay oblivious until the outcome is about to be decided. Then break out the strong drink.
Of course, there are the games that go 14 innings. Bleah.
mr. knick, wasn't there just horrendous storms in the islands? wonder if that's a factor.
wonkette's saying...
FL: 52/48 - KERRY
OH: 52/47 - KERRY
MI: 51/48 - KERRY
PA: 58/42 - KERRY
IA: 50/48 - KERRY
WI: 53/47 - KERRY
MN: 57/42 - KERRY
NH: 58/41 - KERRY
ME: 55/44 - KERRY
NM: 49/49 - TIE
NV: 48/49 - BUSH
CO: 49/50 - BUSH
AR: 45/54 - BUSH
NC: 47/53 - BUSH
Beautiful, SideDish. And not just the columnar format.
But my state is for the moment solidly in the Bushes. Bleh. I guess I'll have to give up the dream. :( But as long as the other results hold, I'll find a way to live with it...
Hey...where's the Nader Factor?
Those numbers are mighty suspect. OH with +5? NH with +17?! I don't believe them.
Far too early to read these numbers seriously at all. There's going to be some serious swing between now and tonight.
There's going to be some serious swing between now and tonight.*wikki-wikki-guitar music*
I don't like this dead heat stuff, it's giving me ulcers.
what mid said. this time in 2000 gore was like 3 points ahead in florida. so who knows. and of course the farther west the state, the shakier the numbers as it's earlier.
Oh lord... The local Democrat contingent is having their "Victory Celebration" downstairs from my apartment (2nd to last paragraph).
Where's that thread for hangover cures? I'm gonna need it...
I don't believe those numbers at all, either.
However, I suspect that the election will be over as soon as they announce the first results.
Anything greater than two points will essentially be decided, and almost everything important is in the Eastern Time Zone. I imagine that whoever takes two out of Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Florida wins.
SideDish: There was a nasty storm that lasted half a week. It started along the eclipse last week, and didn't settle until halloween. But today is a bright, shiny day. No reason to stay in (and even at it's worst, the weather is still usually nice enough to not prevent people from going out). There was a helluva lot of people early voting last week. I was there grabbing a sample ballot, and I couldn't believe how packed the place was. The line had to have been an hour wait. So maybe everyone has voted already. (There's also still +7 hours left here to vote)
I'm wondering if I should be making some calls about the dead electronic voting machine.
Some on, SideDish. New numbers on Slate already! Hurry up!
Derail: SideDish, I am terribly in love with the three cats named after London'sTubestations.
/Derail
I still think Bush will most likely win. Like Reagan and Nixon, nothing seems to stick; like Reagan it seems people suspend their critical faculties completely evaluating him.
fuyugare: Nope, just a little hackery at the expense of the bulk of MoFi-ers, but made with a light heart. I personally have no hard feelings toward folks here for hating the man.
But I will enjoy revelling a bit if Bush wins, for it will entail much bewailing on many monkeys' parts.
I've got a 6-pack of Guinness on the line with my older brother that Bush will win, so I do have something vested in the election after all.
If Kerry wins, I'll never ask Tracicle for another pony ever again.
Hey all you monkeys, I voted around 10:30 this morning. I drove around the countryside picking up people, taking to the polls, because they had no way to get there. A total of 12 people, I taxied to the polls.
I am still scared that Bush might win. I can't stand the suspense.
I apologise about my immediately previous message. It was sent in error and those responsible for it have been sacked.
...if you're looking for fresh toasted exit poll results, slate and wonkette are down with heavy traffic. Any other sites still handling the traffic demands?
Storytime! This actually happened in class today... I go to a conservative school in Dallas, so people just don't get liberals. Just something to keep in mind.
X: Would you have voted for Gore in 2000?
Me: Yup.
X: Are you really telling me that Gore would've handled 9/11 better than Bush did? <-- very common right-wing attack I hear
Me: Unquestionably.
X (raising his voice): How can you say that?
Me (slightly hysterical): Bush invaded the wrong country! That takes effort!
To which we both got kicked out of class.
Happy voting, all.
Just got back from the polling place and there is truly a buzz in the air, different than any time I've voted before.
Not only does this huge turnout across the country mean Bush is most likely done, it could mean something even bigger: a whole generation of young people who will have a lifelong involvement in politics. My polling place is near UCLA and it is inspiring to see how involved the students were and how everyone was excited to be there.
Has anyone else experienced this kind of excitement in the air at the polls?
I still think Bush will most likely win. Like Reagan and Nixon, nothing seems to stick; like Reagan it seems people suspend their critical faculties completely evaluating him.
Unlike Reagan, who I believe enjoyed unreal approval ratings of around 70%+ for most of his time, Bush is approved by something like 45% and simply lacks the numbers. He's done.
Dr. Jimmy11, now that you have shown that you are a local, it is incumbent on you to show up at the next LA meetup.
GO KERRY!
I seem to be writing in caps a lot today.
Don't worry, I saw many people in caps today. Most of them Sox caps, a few scattered Yankees caps.
squidski
A top hat would be more befitting the occasion
I've got a 6-pack of Guinness on the line with my older brother that Bush will win
Tell you what F8x, if Bush loses (and you by extension have to buy your brother a sixer of that sweet irish nectar) I will not only cover that bet but will throw in an addition six-pack of Guinness if you can find me a news story with the headline, "Bush Gets Bitch-slapped," or some approximation thereof.
Talking Points Memo was down for about 3 hours. Now Mr. Marshall sez:
As you might expect, we've been getting pretty consistent exit poll data all day. But until only a little bit ago we were dealing with our site problems. So I'm going to take a few minutes to pull all the poll data information together and evaluate it. Many of the numbers are available on other sites of course. But not all of them are reliable. At least some are at variance with the numbers I have, which I believe to be accurate. The short version is that Kerry is doing well in the second-tier states and leads, but only by very thin margins, in Ohio and Florida.
*distributes grains of salt*
By the way, it's nice to see the rest of the front page uncluttered by election posts, unlike that place with the blue pages.
LordSludge, how's that free pour thingee expected to turn out? I went to college in SC and it was such a PITA.
It definitely seems to be starting to tip in Kerry's direction.
current trajectory of shit: direct collision with fan
Well, I'm going home now to watch, and wait, and pray.
And drink. And drink a lot.
Hope to see some happy monkeys and much bananas tomorrow.
Unfortunately, I've got a Solids test at 7 (that I should be finishing studying for now), and will therefore be missing out on all the early evening build-up.
Luckily, though, I should get back just in time for the awesomeness that is Jon Stewart.
Have fun, everyone! This'll be a night to remeber. If you're able to.
This is going to be a very bad fucking night to study Prolog, which I have to do. It will only be worsened by the fact that I'll be steadily driving my poor, addled brain into slurring stumblebumification with the one-two combo of Lynchburg whiskey and St. Louis beer. But no way am I getting through tonight sober.
This television election results viewing tip for tonight from Slate:
...the result on television is sometimes like a "version of the Dance of the Seven Veils, in which anchors or correspondents will pretend not to know what's happening in a state but give enough clues for the discerning viewer. They might allude to the high spirits at one campaign headquarters, or start speculating about what effect the loss of this state would have on the other candidate."
CNN has an election night blog but I have a hard time believing that anything fresh is gonna break there.
Zogby is calling Kerry 311, Bush 213, as of 5pm EST.
hmmm
I love all the drunken monkeys...
I will be getting my drink on at the pub where they supposedly planned the Boston Tea Party.
Cheers!
Who you callin' a monken drunky.
?
Yeah well, if Zogby calls enough different results he'll be able to claim he called it correctly at some point, won't he.
(His poll numbers have been the closest to reality IMHO, but still not accounting for all the "unlikely" voters out there voting today.)
All you really need to know about Prolog you can learn from this simple function:
append([], L, L).
append([H|T], L, [H|L']) :- append(T, L, L').
I voted, so whoever that was back in that other thread can stop treating me like shit now. Yay.
LOAD "EXIT POLLS",8
SYS 32768
What the hell is up with those Zogby results? They take 2000's results and then guess on the battleground state based on 2000's results? How the hell is that in any way supposed to be a valid method of guessing? That doesn't seem to make any sense at all. (but I was only a math minor not major, so what do I know)
LOAD "EXIT POLLS",8
SYS 32768
(fn x ⇒ fn y ⇒ fn z ⇒ x z (y z)) (fn x ⇒ fn y ⇒ x) (fn x ⇒ fn y ⇒ x) "rolypolyman";
sorry, I'm a bit drunk right now.
In 2000 there were 105 million voters and Gore won the popular vote by 500,000.
With turnout up this year, I think we can expect more like 115 million voters. I'm now guessing Kerry 53%, Bush 46% which (if correct) would be a margin of over 8 million votes.
I don't think the country (or the courts) is gonna listen to any challenges this time around. It just isn't going to be close enough to take to court unless the loser wants to make it clear that the voters don't matter. It's gonna be over by 1 AM Eastern Time, at the latest.
mercurious, I so want to believe you're right... I'm just a little afraid of being hopeful.
It's still early, but the New York Times shows Bush winning Kentucky and Indiana about 55-44 each right now. In 2000, Bush took these states 57-41.
Hopefully this 2 point swing will carry over to more states...
For those monkeys not in Diebold states, cast your ballot at the Diebold demonstration precinct. (Myself, I voted by connecting broken arrows on an enormous paper ballot.)
Headline from Drudge:
"ENOUGH OF THE MEDIA EXITS; LETS COUNT THE PEOPLE'S VOTES!"
That means Bush is losing, Kerry is winning.
Wurwilf, who's treating you like shit?! Want me to kick his ass?
*Hiiiiii-ya!*
*lends minda25 100 TON HAMMER, walks away nonchalantly*
Big Fat Thread results:
Mefi Mofi
240 193
Cool whizzy map graphic thing of incoming results from the BBC here.
I waited about an hour to vote today. Three separate precincts vote at my location, and it was an absolute zoo. It was so exciting to see! (my district is heavy on college students, so there were lots of first-time voters). Then I went door-to-door for the Democrats making sure people went out to vote... in the rain... but it'll be worth it if Kerry wins.
... It's 7:30. Time to start drinking.
If we get Ohio, we can totally beat Mefi to 270.
With 0.7% of the precincts reporting, President Bush holds a wide lead over Senator Kerry. I think it's safe to say that Bush wins. Better luck next time, Senator!
*hefts hammer, goes in search of the Wurwilf abuser*
Worst headline of all time: Would Dubya Run in 2008? Those bitches at Slate can't let me enjoy my (still not certain) victory for one bloody second.
NBC is showing Bush with a 58-42% lead over Kerry. ... I don't think I can handle the election coverage yet.
I suppose there's nothing stopping W from running again then if he loses this one, is there? The terms don't have to be consecutive?
I'm taking a drink every time I hear the word "percent."
I'm taking a drink every time idest takes a drink.
tracicle: Nope. There is even historical precedent for this — Grover Cleveland, who served two non-contiguous terms. In 1888 he lost the election to Benjamin Harrison, who, incidentally, lost the popular vote but had an electoral rout (233 to 168). Cleveland regained the presidency in 1892, making him the first (and only) man to win the popular vote three times in succession.
idest: that should do it
Sweet, just turned on the TV and I've got Fox News live. So it's the worst thing I could probably be watching, but it's something at least. They've got a clear margin in favour of Bush - something like 57% to Kerry's 42% and 39 to 3 electoral votes in favour of Bush.
minda25, when you find the Wurwilf abuser, give 'em a thwack for me!
*takes swig of Bowmore*
8pm eastern, Bush gets some states he was supposed to get, Kerry gets some states he was supposed to get -- but NJ goes to Kerry.
The snowball just started rolling, baby.
Bush is so totally winning so far. Man, it's not even close.
77 electoral to 66, now in Kerry's favour.
#mofirc anyone?
CBS and NBC have totally different projections. What's up with that?
CNN is way jumping the gun. I like the NY Times flash thingie that toggles from geogrphic to electoral.
fuyugare, don't forget about FDR. He won the popular vote four times in a row.
Fox are falling over themselves to say it's better to call the election correctly than to call it first. *snickers*
Thanks Cin, I stand corrected.
Yeah, idest, I've been toggling back and forth between geographic and electoral, just to see the cool transition.
There's, like, five whole people in #mofirc right now. It's chaos!
I was just gonna post and gloat about talking with you, tracicle. But you beat me to it and now I can't make anyone jealous. Drat.
OK... I just did an hour of yoga and ate some dinner. I am now prepared to head to the pub and watch the results. So far no surprises, but all the important states are still up for grabs. Catchya on the other side, monkeys!
Where is #mofirc?
tracicle, what time is it in Bashilandia? You're burning the midnight oil, no?
Just checked it. You're not.
This is gonna be great if Kerry wins the electoral college vote and Bush wins the popular vote. If so, me thinks this spells the end of the EC.
Nope, it's 2:25pm. Kid #1 is napping, so I'm catching up on the news.
#mofirc is on irc.slashnet.org.
yeah, tracicle, i've been surfing the cable news channels, and it's kinda fun watching the talking heads jostling with each other to tell the audience most loudly how stupid they are.
I am. But that's cos I have a major coursework due on Thursday.
Uh... I mean, GO KERRY!
From the little I know of the electoral college, it sounds like a dated concept that outgrew itself when mass communication got so easy.
plus, i think i have an election nite crush on vanessa kerry.
Cool. Once we get rid of the EC, can we please get a parliament so something can get done around here?
muttermutter bloody fannying about muttermutter
From the little I know of the electoral college, it sounds like a dated concept that outgrew itself when mass communication got so easy.
That's right on the nose tracicle. Actually, I'd say it outgrew itself once we started schooling all our children.
electoral-vote.com is down again.
From the little I know of the electoral college, it sounds like a dated concept that outgrew itself when mass communication got so easy.
I actually like the electoral process. I think it does its job, which is to prevent tyranny by slim majorities. And the USA is a big, big piece of real estate; people in different regions of the country really do have different worldviews and issues of interest to them. The example I always like to give is a comparison of me, in San Francisco, where I benefit from lots of infrastructure, a ton of law enforcement enforcing the law, access to public arts and services, etc., with the rancher in rural Wyoming, for whom the nearest cop might be 75 miles away and who rarely uses public services. He and I are understandably probably going to differ on issues like gun control, government spending, taxation, etc.
Well put HawthorneWingo, but if the Wyoming rancher depends less on gov services, why should he get greater representation via the electoral college than those of us who depend more on gov services?
Problem is the all or nothing approach. If a state is 51%-49%, all the electoral votes go to the 51% critter. If that's not tyranny by slim majority, I don't know what is.
Most of the data we are now seeing is from the smaller more rural and Bush leaning counties/precincts that have a relatively easy job of vote counting. The posted results are skewed badly. I'm trying to keep this in mind right now, while I try and find those valium I stashed somewhere last summer...
Some states, colorado being one of them, are experimenting with dividing their electoral votes to reflect the divide among the population.
I'm curious as to what you all think of this.
Sounds logical to me. And fair.
NickDanger - dividing electoral votes is the first step toward true democracy. And that will lead to anarchy . . . dogs and cats living together in sin . . . and so forth
HawthorneWingo: Except the fact is that the Wyoming rancher is more dependent on government services. Your argument is flawed, because the states with undue power in fact recieve the bulk of federal dollars.
The red states are, in fact, welfare cases leeching off the blue, for the most part; the Economist did good run down about a year or so back.
*cannot get into #mofirc*
*too tech-illiterate to figure out #irc, but doesn't want to admit it to anyone.*
I could barely figure out how to get onto #mefi with the full instructions and link in the MeFi Wiki...
There are currently 93 MeFi all-stars, lurkers and wannabes in the chatroom. Can't get a %$#@! in edgeways.
Come to #mofirc, Wendell. :-)
Um, that too.
Mfpb, we keep seeing you... but then you seem to fade away...
Oops, looks like Colorado has rejected the ev split proposal. Too bad.
fear not, idest - you'll always be very close to my heart.
Nickdanger - it was the moral thing to do even if they have to call it before the votes are counted
From the BBC: "Nearly half the polling stations in Miami and surrounding areas are still open after the official closing time to try to allow queues of voters to cast their ballots. A legal dispute is also emerging about counting absentee ballots." Ohio's still open too.
/on topic but blatantly obvious
FLA dept of state - reliable source? hmmm
There are good challenges to the EC, but mostly I agree with Hawthorne. Winner-take-all is frigging stupid, though. EC votes for a state should be awarded individually.
Stupid blinking bbc map, make more states turn blue!
anyone able to get electoral-vote.com?
Damned cautious NYT map... (I approve, of course)
www.electoral-vote5.com works for me, steveno.
electoral-vote.com has it
John Kerry 262
The Evil One 261
thanks idest - looks like they have updated since this morning
darn you electoral map ! BE MORE FUNNY!
For the record, I have never inhaled tequila at this rate before, not even when I thought I was in love once and wanted it desperately to be so.
My county in OH just went red. Nooooooo!
If you're stressing, add California's 55 to Kerry's total. It helps.
mmm...bring on the Stewart!
I know the feeling, goofyfoot. I'm on my third Jamesons and don't feel a damned thing. Um, I mean I don't feel drunk. Just keyed up and nervous.
Florida is giving me a heart attack. I dare not check Ohio.
Leave Ohio be. It's bad.
OH is fuckt. It's absolute chaos there. I just called a friend in Columbus and the word on the street is that they are about to call in Snake Plissken.
Snake Plissken? I thought he was dead?
I have to quit watching CNN, as it's just making me nervous. I desperately need the Daily Show.
CSPAN is more fun
Ohio results as I have them right now... [SPOILER ALERT!]
NYT:
52.33% for BUSH
47.13% for KERRY
24.8% reporting
CBC.ca:
52% for BUSH
47% for KERRY
27% reporting
BBC:
51.5% for BUSH
47.9% for KERRY
19% reporting
-----
try not to worry. They're probably still voting in some counties, and with only a quarter of the state actually reporting, it's far too early to call.
Florida looks lost. So much for the virgin voters. I hate virgins.
No no, they haven't counted the early votes in FL yet. That was something like 25 - 30% of the vote, and was a key Democratic strategy.
Nader live on CSPAN
Heart palpitations. I'm having fucking heart palpitations. Please, God, if you exist, show us just a little more love. Get rid of the Evildoer.
Also, help us catch Osama Bin Laden.
ahhhhhh.....Daily Show
I swear to God, we're fucked for a very long time if more blue states don't start popping up on that map.
McCain is on CBS. Just about admitted that troops will be in Iraq for years. Looked like he was sucking a lemon when he did the obligatory ". . .when Bush is re-elected. . "
not a single red state has appeared that hasn't been predicted by electoral-vote.com with a Kerry victory.
<ignorant>
according to this (nifty) graphic, Bush is leading the popular vote, but Kerry has more electoral collage votes. Isn't that what happened in 2000? But the other way around? WTF is going on here?
</ignorant>
(I'm leaving Florida alone completely because it'll probably take another 6 weeks to get their shit together.)
steveno, the problem would be the blue states predicted by electoral-vote.com that may turn red.
prismatic: the NYT is being very careful in awarding states to candidates. While a lot of population numbers are in (numbers are coming in from Utah by now even), they've only actually declared 12 states as definitely red or blue. Two of those are Illinois and New York, which have tons of EVs, hence the high EV count for Kerry.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Election Official Blog: Intro
Okay, I just got back from working the polls in Virginia. To give you an idea of just how weird the voting process is and the little bubble we are in (no cell phones, cut off from Internet access) and to give non-American monkeys an idea of our election ephemera, here's my notes taken through my 16-hour day.
genial - and I may grow a third eye, but that has not happened.
Well, with only 20% of precincts reporting here in Arkansas, it's becoming abundantly clear: We really, really hate gay people. Three to one.
Sometimes I'm ashamed of my species.
CBS just called Pennsylvania for Kerry!
Mfpb: thanks... As an Aussie, I have this uneasy feeling about the whole US voting system... it just looks a bit wrong (only 50-60% of the eligible population votes... and then it's all based on the population of the states? doesn't seem right somehow!)
but that makes it a bit more comprehensible...
prismatic7 - of course it's not right. Just look at our "president".
BearGuy's Time-delayed Election Official Blog: 12:20 am
Can't sleep. Wrote a few emails to friends as a prediction to my dad (also in Virginia). For non-Americans, Virginia to me epitomizes the closeness of the election. It's only gone to a Democrat previously in 1964 and 1948. It's about as Republican as you want to get. Kerry has been polling 47% to Bush's 51%. Bush won the state handily in 2000 by 16 points and 204,000 votes.
But all that has changed.
Four years later, we have 450,000 new voters on the polls, 300,000 in the past year--close to 200,000 signed up in the Fall before registration polled. Virginia is average in this respect. All across the country I hear about voter registrations of unheard proportions. An estimated 700,000 people will take to the polls in Virginia that did not vote in 2000. 700,000. That's much more than the 204,000 Bush won with and the state is polling closer.
Alomost any pundit will tell you that Bush will take Virginia or be deemed crazy. I think Bush will win this state. But objectively, it's a "secret swing state"--like New Jersey going to the Republican instead of the Democrats. It could happen.
Maybe that's why I can't sleep. Too exciting. Jesus, this is like before a big test.
I have to sleep though, I get up in less than four hours.
I didn't get to vote! 2 1/2 to 3 hour waits at the polls all over Southwestern Illinois; 75%+ voter turnout rates, compared to like 40% in '00. My kids needed dinner. Someone throw a vote for me out there, eh? Whoever you like is fine with me.
steveno: i may not like w. but the difference a kerry win will make in real terms to australia will probably be minimal - the alliance will remain the same, the FTA will probably go ahead unchanged (and even the US Senate can't believe that Australia signed that!) and our commitment in the godawful mess in Iraq will be the same. If we'd elected Latham instead of Howard, then there might have been change...
In any case, I think a change of preznit in the US will affect European/Middle East politics more than Asia/Pacific...
Fes - Tell the kids they have to go to bed without supper - thats the price of living in a terroist free Amerika
NBC just called: 199 Kerry, 207 Bush.
Whoa, big jump on CBS, now predicting 209 Bush 199 Kerry with California and Pennsylvania being among the pertinent additions.
I don't have kids, which maybe makes it easy for me to say this, but a vote every four years has a sort of weight to it that a dinner the kids will eventually get does not.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Election Official Blog: 4:15am EST
Okay, awake again. I feel strangely rested. Am I insane? Don't answer that.
I'm waking up to the BBC "ovenight broadcast because it's the "dead of night" for NPR. They're mentioning the polls will be opening in the States in a few hours. It feels so weird listening to this 'outside commentary' on what I'm about to be in the thick of in just a bit.
Here we go.
Anyone know if there's a chance of a tie at this point?
Maverick21xx - yes, I know.
Electoral Vote Predictor 2004: Kerry 262 Bush 261
Steveno: They're 8 months and 4 1/2, so skipping dinner is out. Mrs. Fes was still in line and had been for 2 hours when I got off work and headed toward the polls. *Someone* had to go home and feed the young'uns and, rather than have her waste two hours of linestanding only for me to go and basically do the same thing, I went home and fed the young'uns.
Christ, I feel sick. I just feel so sick. It's unbelievably close and all the other races are just going back and forth. This is all so bizarre.......
Hawaiian Fuzzy Math-a-Thon!
270 EVs needed; 112 Kerry EVs definite as of now.
I predict he can pick up the three west coast states and Pennsylvania; that gives him....
112 + 55 (CA) + 7 (OR) + 11 (WA) + 21 (PA) = 206.
those are the only semi-definites as of now... in lieu of any realistic guessing, let's see how many ways Hawaii can fuck either candidate over!
1. Kerry takes Nevada, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Iowa, Florida; Bush takes everything else. This leaves us with Bush @ 268, Kerry @266. Hawaii's 4 electoral votes could push either to 272 or 270, respectively.
2. Kerry takes Ohio, Florida, Minnesota, and New Hampshire, but loses everything else. Numbers would be exactly the same (Bush 268, Kerry 266, Hawaii 4!)
3. Hawaii declares independence, joins axis of evil.
the more I'm looking at these maps, the less confident I'm getting about this whole Kerry winning thing.
BTW, Fes...your state did good so it's all okay! Ha! Ha!
That's easy, feed the 8 month old to the 4 year old, then you finish the feeding in half the time.
Damn, sorry, Fes. FWIW, looks like MO liked your guy.
Anyone know if there's a chance of a tie at this point?
Take the current results and add Nevada, New Mexico, Hawaii, Minnesota, Nevada, New Hampshire, and Florida to the Kerry column. Do mental math.
That's the only way I can find right now based on what we think is true.
that is, assuming Kerry takes the three west coast states and Pennsylvania. sorry.
mct....what?
CO joins the evil empire
I hope the people in New Hampshire voting for Nader actually wanted a Bush win (that's tight in there at the moment...)
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 5:03am EST
I'm here at John Adams school, perhaps the most isolated of the City of Alexandria's 24 precincts. 3,000 of the city's 75,000 voters could come through here. I've already accounted for the 6,000 absentee voters. Usually, we apparently get 2,000 absentee votes in a presidential election.
Okay, on to set up the voting machines.
Missouri has gone for Bush. Fes lives there, and has indicated that he's voting for Bush. Ergo, his guy won for president in MO.
People are voting for Nader?
Grab them by their horns.
Ah, my misunderstanding. I thought Fes was in Illinois. But in that case....Fes, your state did awful! I take everything else good that I said back! ;)
Has anyone come across a site with an easy to read list of remaining uncalled states, with numbers of electoral votes? All the cute maps are, um, cute, but I just want to see the detailed stats on the gray areas at once...
Kerry in 13.
Might as well go to bed. Florida is going all attention whore on us again. We won't have real results until Thursday noon.
Spooky: cool! But how about this instead: when we all eventually meet up at a grand, universal MoFi Meetup, I'll buy you a couple rounds. Regardless of who wins...
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 5:50am EST
Oh. My. God.
We have twice as many officials as last presidential election: 15 in all. Across the city, there are 500. My job, the first as an assistant chief, is supposed to be crowd control. Basically, as the voters come into the building, I make sure they're in their lines, educate them on how to use the voting machines, and make sure they're ready to provide ID. I have two or three people to help me.
But I just went out of the gym after setting up the machines and we have a line out the door. That's 100 meters! We've never had a line. One or two people sure, but never a line at this hour. THe polls aren't even open yet.
This is going to be one hell of a day.
Just got back from the pub, and we were switching back and forth from CNN to Daily Show. The latter was far more entertaining.
CNN's coverage is just plain wonky. I can't stop thinking about how hot Paula Zahn is.
gawd...this is all over the place... even refreshing the NYT results every few minutes the results in so many states are flip-flopping for one then the other. i don't even live there and i'm biting my nails. good luck, US Monkeys!
The fear that is going to pervade the country is going to be thick tomorrow. This is really surreal.
Chris Matthews/ MSNBC has good coverage
I thought of that, but instead the Beast Rabban and I went with Little Caesar's pizza and juice boxes, with mashed pears and "spring mixed vegetables" for young Feyd-Rautha.
Damn, sorry, Fes. FWIW, looks like MO liked your guy.
Actually, now that it's moot from a personal pov, I had planned to cast a vote for Kerry. The Economist editorial cut a lot of ice for me, far more than nearly any argument I'd heard. I looked at the three big issues: Economics - I'm a fiscal conservative, and I dislike the protectionism, high deficits and overt sops to preferred industries of the Bush Administration. Iraq: While I did and do feel the war was both justified and laudable, I don't feel that it's been protracted competently. Social Issues: As an atheist, I find the overt religiousity, as well as the tendency toward intolerance vetted by faith, distasteful. So, while I don't feel that Kerry is a considerably better candidate - imo, Kerry is as flawed as Bush, perhaps more so in some ways - and while I also find the charges that Bush is motivated by malevolence specious, it seems to me that Kerry could exercise a bit more competence abroad and a bit more pragmatism domestically.
Just to clarify: I work in Missouri, but live across the River in Illinois. Darshon had it right :)
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 6:02am EST
The polls opened 2 minutes ago, the line is lurching forward. I just got back from looking outside. Not only is the line out the door, but it's 200 meters down the sidewalk. Even knowing all the numbers I spouted off earlier doesn't prepare me for the visual shock. How many people are in this precinct again?
:>
O God.
2.
Dammit this is awful. And I'm still sober.
Ah, I had you wrong on both counts. Well, I simply wasn't up to date on your presidential preference -- last I'd heard, you were still leaning toward Bush -- but I'd misunderstood about the other. I had you actually living in St. Louis.
My apologizes. In my defense, it was a fair assumption, given my thinking that such an intelligent, worldly, cultivated, and articulate gentleman as yourself could only have come from my home state.
IMO, Bush will win unless
1. Kerry takes Ohio and every other swing state except Florida.
2. Kerry takes Florida and every other swing state except Ohio and maybe New Hampshire or Hawaii (damn you Hawaii.)
3. Bush loses Florida AND Ohio (virtually impossible) while Kerry wins Minnesota and Iowa (easy).
Forget what TV's saying, the numbers just aren't adding up. Don't mean to crush any hopes here but I just don't see how realistic these are. #3 would be a miracle; #2 will require a gargantuan legal battle, and #1 will require a lot of divine intervention now.
Ack. Apologies.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 7:36 am EST
Usual at this time, the morning rush is dying down. There's no end in site. THe line is just as long. I've taken up a position just inside the building. As I see enough new faces and here enough whispered questions about whether you need a photo ID or not, I swing into action.
I welcome all the voters and thank them for coming out. I go through all the regulations for the COmmonwealth of Virginia governing elections. I have to be careful. We have poll watchers here today from the Bush/Cheney camp, and in VIrginia, any registered voter can challenge any other registered voter's right to vote. (they generally need evidence or grounds, but it can be a trial to get a curmudgeon ejected should they decide to rear their head). So far so good. And most people aren't complaining about the voting machines. Maybe because they're _not_ touchscreen and don't suck.
I finally had breakfast, btw. One hard-boiled egg. Apart from that, I'm subsisting on water.
So close yet so far. And will remain dangling like a carrot, never to be reached.
WTF! Were the exit polls really that far off? I hope somebody's keeping track of which are the Diebold results and which are the real ones.
What was BearGuy thinking?
Oh . . yeah!
I can *so*, fuyugare.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 8:34 am EST
I'm way too busy to be scared, but if I'd be thinking about it, I'd be dreaded 5pm and the home stretch.
I just looked outside. The line is down the sidewalk and out of eyesight. It is at least half a kilometer long. They are forcing people to park at a grocery several blocks away and walk here because from there, they don't have to walk far to the end of the line.
We're doing are best to deal with the extremely elderly and sick voters. The Bush/Cheney and Kerry/Edwards boosters are coming in every few minutes with a new "special needs" voter. We're trying to get to all of them, but it's getting overwhelming.
ABC called Florida for Bush.
fuck, fuck fuck, fuck . . .
No apologies necessary, of course! I claim St. Louis because no one's ever heard of "O'Fallon Illinois, Home of the Panthers." And as for Bush, I had been leaning toward him for most of the campaign, and only really decided to throw the other way in the last week or so. And while I do hail from the lawless lands beyond the Mississippi, between slaying wolves and parlaying with the Pawnee there are those among us who aspire to the levels of erudition and gentlemanly behavior as displayed so well by the sons of the Show Me State such as yourself.
ABC just colored FL red.
fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck
Boy, them Internets polls and political futures markets really had us all going there for awhile, didn't they?
Your a good man, BearGuy, for doing such a thankless job. I imagine your sleeping now, hope it went well for you.
Shit. There it goes.
Erudition and gentlemanly behavior such as I exhibited in my previous comment, I presume.
*tips top hat to Fes, dons kidskin gloves*
God. Motherfucking. Dammit.
I cannot believe the flip-flopping that is going on. It's incredible.
Says the Votemaster at electoral-vote.com:
All the servers appear to be under attack now, also DNS. I added another large multiprocessor but it doesn't seem to help much. I don't this is going to work. Sorry.
WTF???
I'm going to lapse into depression now.
I voted for Kerry at 7 this morning in Broward County, FL. Sorry, guys... a lot of us were trying real hard down here.
Oh ABC called it for Bush? OHHhhhh - well hell, call that shit off!
Goddamn.
fuck fuck fuckity fuckfuckfuck
Mother... shitter... Son of an... ass.
STILL NOT DRUNK.
Ohio is the new Florida
*bows low to MCT in traditional fashion*
Think nothing of it. Politics can confound even the most e'en-tempered, milord.
This is depressing me, and I'm rooting for Bush. Will someone please crack a joke? It's not the end of the fargin' world, people!!
Me either, shinything. And not for lack of trying, either. Who put speed in my Jamesons?
The one bright spot? Tomorrow's Metatalk! :D
Get your rally caps on, people. All you Boston fans need to be milking a little extra comeback mojo right now.
It could be worse: this could be an American Idol thread.
For shame, Ohio.
Fes wins.
And what is up with New Hampshire?
Drunk. Well, not quite, but trying. CBS called FL red.
I just want to say that Karen Hughes reminds me of nothing good, and everything horrible.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 9:04 am EST
Well, I'm beginning to reap the rewards of being an "Assistant Chief" election offical, not just a garden variety one. Because so many of my fellows are new this year, they're deferring most questions to me, the other AC, or the chief. Suddenly, I'm supposed to be an expert, not just a people person--and, I need to fill out a lot more forms. Yeesh.
Funny thing happened though. Because I was an assistant chief, I decided to spend my 'princely' $25 pay raise on snacks for the election officials. This included two dozen krispy kreme donuts and some coffee made in a coffee maker I brought.
Because of the insane busy-ness, I was only able to bring in the donuts after 7am. I haven't seen them or been able to start the coffee maker since.
But when I concluded my welcome voter spiel just now and asked if folks had any question, somebody asked, "Where are the krispy kremes?"
Apparently, for the past few hours, the word had gone back and forth among this line of hundreds upon hundreds of people, that there were donuts available inside. Amazing--and a little eerie. I felt like doing a sociology experiemtn right there, but my main question right now is, where are the krispy kremes? I sure as hell haven't had any. /-:
BearGuy: thanks for humanising this election for a furriner...
A ray of shining hope penetrates the clouds of despair!
New numbers: Michigan and Wisconsin seem to be leaning towards Kerry now, I don't know when this suddenly happened, but that's absolutely crucial.
Steps to a possible Kerry victory:
1. Kerry's existing definites (i.e., not including New Hampshire or anything in the Midwest) + Washington and Oregon = 206. This is almost guaranteed.
2. Add 17 for Minnesota and Iowa, which are looking relatively safe at this moment. That's 223.
3. The crucial step: add Ohio. I'm assuming Florida's lost, and so Kerry has to make it here. If he does, this brings the total to 253.
4. Add the new Kerry converts of Michigan and Wisconsin and we have our 270 exactly!
Get off the computer and go pray, because Iowa got quite a bit narrower since I started writing this. It can alternatively be replaced by Kerry victories in Hawaii and New Hampshire, but I'm not counting on it.
The bottom line: pray for Michigan and just a little bit of OHIO.
Is Kerry starting a comeback in Ohio? He was down by almost 150,000 earlier, but now it's down to 120k.
Yay Washington!
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 10:20 am EST
Alexandria, and probably a bunch of other areas in the U.S. have a method of voting named "curbside voting." Basically, if you're really, really elderly, or sick, and can't make it inside physically, and/or could reasonably assumed able to collapse dead if waiting for the two and a half hours it seems to be taking, we can bring the vote to you in an envelope which you then seal and hand back to us.
Generally, two of us have to do this so there's no doubt of impropriety--a Democrat and a Republican. Somebody must have hit the senior citizen's phone bank, because suddently we have about 8 people clogging up the parking lot lanes, waiting for these ballots. I've never had to do these before, we didn't have them in previous elections and already I almost screwed up a couple.
Can you imagine if you were directly responsible for someone not being able to vote because of your idiocy? Can you imagine being the "Florida" of someone's imagination. Man, it's a good thing we're so busy, otherwise I'd remember to be stressed out. (-:
P.S. Still no sign of the krispy kremes.
There's lots of I-was-there voter experiences at this thread, prismatic.
thanks goofyfoot
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 12:00 pm EST
The line is evaporating like a the morning mist in the face of the rising sun. Maybe I'm feeling poetic because I've been on my feet for nearly 8 hours.
I've finally gotten through the deluge of "curbside voters." One of the old hands, Josh, figured out a quick way to do them. Thank god. The lines are moving quickly now. It's still several hundred people long, but I've gotten really good at estimating time for waiting to vote. I've it down to a three-minute margin of error (i.e. "From this point, it'll be 20 minutes until you can vote" etc.)
And also, I've finally tracked down the krispy kremes, and my fellow officials have nearly downed the first dozen. Well done!
Mmmm, pumpkin spice donut, mmmmm.
This is almost as much fun as root canal surgery.
Can't say the world's not interesting!
[returns to grubby alleyway behind apartment; assumes fetal position in empty refrigerator box.]
What the hell is wrong with the US?
Maybe I've had too much to drink.
Went through the swing states on CNN one by one. Nevada (5) and Wisconsin (10) are still looking too close to call. Otherwise, Bush is at 261, Kerry's at 244. Unless there's a miracle in Ohio, I really think it's over for Kerry. (And... America. Well, maybe not, but I don't really want to stick around to find out.)
Any Brits want to tell me how horrible Britain is before I buy my plane ticket and start packing my bags?
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 2:15 pm EST
I nearly lost it just now. I had been worried I'd get dragged into an argument with a voter about whether our voting machines were secure and sufficently tamper-proof (they are, and they're not Diebolds nor touchscreens). Ironically, I nearly lost it for an argument for the exact opposite.
We had an elderlu Vietnamese lady come in to vote on a walker. By the time she made it inside the polling place, she looked like she was going to collapse. I learned from her niece or daughter that she had just gotten out of the hospital for some major surgery.
As I said, the Commonwealth of Virginia tries to allow a modicum of common sense in its voting procedures. She's a perfect candidate for a "curbside vote." I explain to her and her niece that we can arrange for her to sit down at the front of the line until her place is called, we might be able to allow her to move to the front of the line, or try the curbside vote. They elect curbside.
I come out with the ballot, and the trouble begins. Because it is not electronic, she doesn't want to fill it out. How can she trust it? I try to explain the procdures, it just goes downhill from there.
Northern Virginia, where I live, has a significant Vietnamese population. It always has for as long as I've lived here. After the Second Indochina War (what we call the Vietnam War and the Vietnamese call the American War), a large portion of refugees settled in this area, among others in the United States.
I wasn't thinking, but she is a naturalised citizen who left a country where "elections" happened, but always wound up for the communists. How can she trust me? I'm running out of ways to explain how the system works. I'm exhausted, and the line is beginning to pick up again. I need her to decide to vote "curbside" or have me cancel the ballot, but she refuses to even make a decision.
I don't know what to do. I can't leave the ballot unattended while she makes the desicion, but the longer she waits, the longer the line and questions will come in. Finally, the chief comes over, and through his help, we explain exactly how our process for "curbside votes" works and I understand the origin of her fears. It is sobering, but at last we both apologize to one another for the misunderstanding.
I hope I don't have too many more of these, but man, it just goes to show how much people are passionate about their votes. I won't blame 'em one bit.
At the same time, I think it's time for another krisy kreme donut.
BearGuy; the "Florida" of someone's imagination.
that's priceless.
So is this fucker going to wind up in the courts again? I'm about to swear off politics altogether.
what else y'got?
Measure 36 (defining marriage as between a man and a woman) just passed here in Oregon. Auuughhh so upsetting.
And I'm too young to (legally) drink. Damn.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 2:30 pm EST
Few! Finally got a chance to escape to a back room and have lunch. 10 minutes off my feet and eating were rarely so wondrous.
Here in Arkansas, the language of the amendment is so horrible that it not only bans marriages and civil unions to gay couples, it not only prohibits the legal rights of marriage to gay couples, but it could threaten the legal marital status for certain straight couples.
That's how much we hate homosexuals in Arkansas. We're willing to risk taking down a few straight marriages, just to be on the safe side.
For those of you keeping score at home, I've finished with the beer and moved on to whiskey.
*busts out the whiskey too*
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 4:00 pm EST
I feel it in the air. I feel it in the water. The second rush is coming. I'm back out doing crowd control on our seriously reduced line, but I will need help soon, and one of our officials, Josh, seems to have disappeared. Thanks to food and the healing power of krispy kremes, I'm not entertaining any outlandish notions, but it is puzzling. No one has seen him for over two hours.
Were there ever Twilight Zone episodes during elections?
What makes people be so ugly?
Shit. Have a shot a tequila, wolfgang and middleclasstool.
*going to fix a vodka drink*
I hate to say it, but from the precincts left to count, I can't see Kerry making up his 120,000 vote deficit in Ohio.
I am floored that Bush is winning the nationwide popular vote.
I will never underestimate the intelligence of Americans again. I now have a much greater understanding of how Nazi Germany came to be. Wave the flag and tell me anything.
*beers, pots*
Here in Arkansas, the language of the amendment is so horrible that it not only bans marriages and civil unions to gay couples, it not only prohibits the legal rights of marriage to gay couples, but it could threaten the legal marital status for certain straight couples.
That's how much we hate homosexuals in Arkansas. We're willing to risk taking down a few straight marriages, just to be on the safe side.
Just wait until Emperor Bush sets up the "reeducation camps" and ovens for non-believers and fags. Just wait. Unless we get a miracle in Ohio, it's what's coming.
It's looking like a rough four years for the rest of the world coming up. The States may go to hell in a handbasket, too, but that's of slightly less concern for the rest of us (except in an, "ew, mean people suck" kind of way).
Let's keep our fingers crossed that the absentee votes in Florida change the results there. It might be enough to make a difference.
Well, I'm off to drown myself in the bath-tub!
Now what I want to know is whether Diebold programming irregularities may be a factor here. What was the "unheard of" turnout for... to give Bush a pat on the back?
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 5:00 pm EST
Josh is back and just in time, I've been the nly person doing voter education (showing them how to use the voting machines) and crowd control. We're ready for the final rush.
Florida absentee ballots -- largely American military, and some wealthy/businessmen.... i.e. Bush supporters. I don't think they'll help.
Let the lawsuits begin! (Really, I mean it)
The first president since the Great Depression to preside over nationwide job loss during his administration, and it seems that most people here think he's hunky-dory.
But hey, a lot of my countrymen still think that Iraq still has significant ties to OBL and 9-11.
Ah, it ain't over yet. I have not heard the corpulent soprano discant.
If Bush wins Ohio, and Kerry wins everything else, they'd be tied at 269. The House would vote. Bush would win.
Funny thing is that Kerry will change the map from the 2000 election. It looks like he will get both New Hampshire and Nevada. But they are irrelevant without Ohio. Without Ohio, Kerry needs New Hampshire, Nevada and New Mexico just to tie (which is as good as a loss for Kerry).
Oh
hi
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 6:00 pm EST
It's the home stretch. All of us can feel it, and we're trying to end on a high note.
By law, anyone who shows up to the polls by 7pm gets to vote, even if they wait in line for an hour after the polls officially close. That means, someone needs to hang out at the back of the line and tell late voters they can't vote. An unpleasant task, and it might fall to Josh and myself.
11:03 PM MT: outrigger calls USA for Bush.
I'm crying for your country.
Do I really have to go to work in the morning?
This is some unbelievable shit...
Pass the vodka..
My state, Washington, voted Kerry, rightly so, however Ohio has just been announced. Time to pack the bags. Local newscasters aren't looking any too happy at their announcements. Me either. Dictatorship, here we come. It's all over.
I'm so scared about what this does to my perception of the American people. I can't imagine living there. Even living next to it makes me angry.
Hey guys, there's plenty of drownin' room in my tub, climb on in!
fuck
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 6:34 pm EST
We don't have a long line any more. It's amazing. What happened to that second rush? No worries, We got at least 80% of registered voters of this precinct here. Those lines from this morning were not a dream.
I just what I hope will be a pleasant cap to the evening. I did two curbside votes for two visually impaired folks: a husband and wife. Their voter assistant (simply another form we officials, make them fill out), read the entire ballot aloud to each of them in turn in a secluded location away from the line. Not only did I see the husband's ID, I saw his seeing eye dog's ID. BJ, the seeing eye dog, has a higher security clearance than I do. I made sure he got an "I Voted" sticker as well. I know he did in spirit.
Nickdanger, I'm pretty sure sharing a tub with the same sex is illegal now in a bunch of states.
This can't be right.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 6:43 pm EST
I just explained to Josh how to make the "15 minutes to Poll close" announcement. You go out in front of the building and actually say, "Hear ye, hear ye, the time is now 6:45pm and the polls will be closing in 15 minutes! I repeat the time is now 6:45pm and the polls will be closing in 15 minutes!"
You cry this at a volume fit to carry over the entire parking lot.
All that's missing is a tricorner hat and a lantern.
Why Ohio? Of all the states to decide our future, why OHIO? Come on people...the fate of the world is resting in the hands of OHIO.
This is unfuckingbelievable. I give up....
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 7:00 pm EST
The polls are closed! The polls are closed! I got to make the final announcemnet and a voter rushed into the building before I finished the sentence. She gets in. Thank god we _didn't_ have the second rush, as this means we get to lock the doors. Generally, even the most ornery late voters have to board the cluebus when they can't open the door to the now closed polling place.
Fucking Americans. To hell with the lot of you. You deserve all you get.
Actually, Smo, the repubs prefer that all of us same-sex-bath-sharers are all in the same place so that the White Haired God may smite us down in his furious anger all the easier.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 7:41 pm EST
We're down to ten voters left. I'm guarding the locked doors just in case a would-be voter slips in when someone exits. What they run into is a bald, bearded guy wearing a tie and weighing in at about 15 stone. Yes, that is me.
I tell them that the polls are closed.
Can they vote?
No. I'm sorry I can't give them better news, but the polls closed at 7pm.
Then they stand there for a few secons, hoping I'll say something else, reverse what I said just for them, or perhaps disappear as a figment of their imagination.
Almost done.
Some blogs are reporting that Bush's leads are way off scale from exit polls in the states that use non-receipt E-voting. I'm trying to find more info on this, but it suspects that there may indeed be foul play.
This is very discouraging for me. Being the first presidential election I've ever voted in(I'm 20, so I couldnt vote last time), I feel as if the system has failed me. I will go to sleep tonight wondering if when I wake up I will learn that the system has failed us, If That everything about this great country I learned about in 7th grade social studies is a complete lie, If the so called greatest country in the world is full of deceptions and lies. Yeah I know I'm young and probably not the keeness when it comes to shady politics, but I still have some ounce of hope that I'll wake up and realize that this is all a nightmare. Good night Monkeys everywhere.
Thanks for the kick, Clockwork! Ooh, in the ribs, right where I like it!
This is unbelievable, I am so sad.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 9:28 pm EST
All the voters are long gone. Most of the election officials are sitting getting ansy. We've packed up the machines, cleaned up the polling place, and are now going through the slow, tedious process of filling out all the paperwork exactly before transporting it to city hall where the phoned in results will be officially recorded and confirmed.
The trouble is, no one can leave. All 15 officials need to sign most of the documents. I'm trying to keep everyone somewhat distracted, engaged or busy as the other assistnat chief and the chief review the checklist. It's like entertaining a whole new batch of voters.
It's over.
America is so over.
Don't make plans for another Presidential Election in '08. It ain't gonna happen.
It was a nice experiment while it lasted.
In 2000, Bush got 50.5million votes to Gore's 51million.
With 78% of the votes in, Bush has 49million to Kerry's 45.6million. Extrapolate to 100% and Kerry has about 58million (7 million more than Gore did) and Bush has 63million. Now where did Bush's 12.5 million new votes come from? Maybe the reason the exit polls showed more strength for Kerry was that the exit polls weren't fixed.
Anybody got a couch in Canada where I can crash?
On the bright side:
Some more great Ani DiFranco (and other) songs.
Four more years of awesome comedy from Jon Stewart.
*prepares couch for wendell*
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : 10:20 pm EST
I'm finally home and can start connecting back to the outside world. Over 2,400 people went to the polls in our one precinct. It was the biggest election I've ever worked at. I'm celebrating regardless. Luckily, I keep a reserve bottle of chanpagne in the fridge for occasions such as this. Not sure where my roommate is, so I guess I'll have to take one on the chin for the team.
Oh yeah, and I'll start writing this time delay blog.
Yeah, very nuanced pronouncement there Nostril.
I haven't, and don't think I will discover a level of drunkenness that makes this acceptable.
**weeps**
Thanks for the offer, Smo, but I don't know if I can accept it from somebody who doesn't even know about the Go-Gos. BTW, nice mug, pug. ;)
Welcome to adulthood, Maverick21xx. It's a bitch. I suppose you should know this now, just so you never get your hopes up; the system will fail you everytime. Sorry to be so defeatest about it, but I just got defeated, again. And even though I am American, those who just voted for Bush deserve everything they get. I didn't want to go along for the ride!
F8xmulder, I've come to respect you a great deal, that hasn't changed, but I am at this moment, amazed that anyone would still be able to vote for 'him'. I am angry now. This is a very sad day in our history.
My instinct is to say: it is not over until EVERY SINGLE VOTE is counted and it is fucking PROVEN that nothing was fucked with.
If we're still stuck with Shrublet then, I'm going to move BACK to America (from London where I currently live,) build me a bowel disruptor and aim it squarely at the asses of power. For lo, they are ripe and full of shit.
As long as Dan Rather keeps talking there may be hope.
Keep talking, Dan. Keep talking.
BearGuy's Time-delayed Blog de la Election Official : November 3, 1:50 am EST
I've spent the past few hours reconnecting with the world, catching up on emails, reading MonkeyFilter, and watching coverage.
How demoralizing.
During the time at the polls, there was every feeling that we were part of something absolutely historic. I didn't need Virginia to be a suprise swing state. But even on the local news channels, there was nothing about the turnout in Virginia. It's listed as a foregone conclusion with just 10% of precincts reporting. )-:
No one wants to be taken for granted. None of the people I helped today did.
And the Colorado proposition has failed. More on that on another thread.
I have no idea how long I've been up at this point, but this long day ends now. I'm ready for my pony, Monkeybashi.
My body is now gloriously exhausted. My feet are calloused, and my head well filled with champagne.
At least we weren't an Ohio or Florida or something worse.
What the future holds, I don't know. I hope it's not as bad as all that.
I'm going to bed now.
i guess that's it, kids. and, like here in Australia, all the arguments you had before are gone.
"We didn't elect him!" - and now you (the collective'you') did.
"He's got no mandate" - (not that one was ever needed) Now he does.
GW Bush is the winner. And no matter how much we hate it, that's it and all and byebye for another four years.
I've said it before - I got a spare mattress, monkeys. Also big cupboards, couches and a large bed. You can all come over to play.
wendell, in my defense, I wasn't even born.
I agree with Darshon.
*climbs into bathtub with nickdanger*
resting assured that he doesn't want to make out with me
Wendell, you can have my room if I get drafted.
Oh wait, I'm in Canada! Sorry.
CNN's just declared Ohio *Green*. What's up with that shit? Also, Iowa can't declare today because of "fatigue at the elector's office?" Huh? I enjoy surreal experiences as much as the next girl, but c'mon!
*gives Bearguy a pony, orders him a foot massage*
Thanks for your posts today, Bearguy. They were really great.
That's right, outrigger, rub it in. Oooh, does that sting, like salt on a wound. Yep.
meredithea: Ohio looks purple on my CNN page.
oooh, me head is swimmin'
Quoting Miles Davis (again), I'm just going to say "Man, that is some fucked-up shit".
BearGuy - yes, thank you very much. They have been the best posts on the election I have read.
Keep talking Dan. Keep talking.
Michigan goes for Kerry
238 Kerry
249 Bush.
Hope?
Pro'lly not. Gettin' sleepy, slippin' down farther in the bathtub,
Sorry outrigger, don't mean to invade your personal drowning space.
The gods must be angry! We just had massive thunder booming all of a sudden and it aint stopping! Just goes to show ya....
That's it...I think I've lost all faith in humanity.
How many semesters do you think I can study abroad in a row? Think I could pull it off for 8 strraight semesters?
Otherwise, I may be joining Nickdanger in that tub.
R 249
D 242
Hawaii just cashed in
Ohio is purple on my CNN.com map, too. But on the channel, Wolf Blitzer called it "green." Good ole Dan Rather is refusing to call Ohio, too. He actually said "Look, kemosabe (!!!), we just can't call Ohio yet." Apparently, there are about 200K provisional ballots outstanding in Ohio (mostly of minority voters whom the Republicans "challenged") and also military votes from out of the country only needed to be postmarked today.
Hey, there are a few American Studies programs in the UK, and cultural studies is really big in Australia. Anyone wanna help me get an academic job abroad (just in case)? I'm graduating in May or August with my Ph.D.!
We now have a raging storm! I'm scared.
rushmc's quote way upthread seems relevant in every possible dimension right now.
Ok, I need sleep. Goodnight, monkeys. I send you all good wishes! I think we're in for another long haul, election-wise. I hope we can all remember that, no matter who wins, as long as we all treat each other with good will (the golden rule, yada yada), we'll be ok.
I'm off to bed as well. Thanks, monkeys. Misery loves company and all that.
If Kerry does get a Electoral College nod based on court action in Ohio (like the Supremes would ever judge in his favor) and loses the popular vote to Bush by THREE MILLION and faces a Senate and House with more Republicans and less Democrats, he won't be able to scratch his own ass in the Oval Office.
Of course, Bush has at least ten million phantom voters out there; but with his control over the Dept. of Judging, nobody will ever be able to prove it even if they prove it.
On the other hand, since I gave up hope, I'm feeling much better.
Other good Dan Rather quotes of the evening:
"Do you hear that knocking? It's the sound of Bush's reelection, and it's at the door."
(nonverbatim) "Is the Kerry camp somewhat like a swan right now - very composed and organized on the surface, but madly kicking underneath?"
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IMHO Bush cheated in Ohio and Florida BIG time. You don't get polls the day before showing such discrepancies against the actual results, especially when all benefit of the doubt (absent cell phone survey targets, new young voters, etc, etc) all went to Kerry.
Can we quit it with the "all Americans are dickheads." Yeah, many of us outside the States are a hell of a disaapointed with the way it looks like their election is going, but that's way, way over the line.
But it is true. All Americans are dickheads.
All Americans are dickheads.
But only Merkins can say it.
All Merkins are dickheads. Some Americans aren't.
I'd just like to congratulate the majority of Baby Boomers in the States for selling out the hopes and dreams of their younger selves.
Now, if you need me, I'll be in a fetal position with a bottle of gin and a chocolate bar.
Condolences, all - come North, bring mukluks. And really thick socks.
I wake up to this? An ill wind blows.
"IT'S OVER: President Bush is narrowly re-elected. It was a wild day with the biggest black eyes for exit pollsters. I wanted Kerry to win. I believed he'd be more able to unite the country at home, more fiscally conservative, more socially inclusive, and better able to rally the world in a more focused war on terror. I still do. But a slim majority of Americans disagreed. And I'm a big believer in the deep wisdom of the American people. They voted in huge numbers, and they made a judgment."
-Andrew Sullivan
And it looks like Thune won SD. That's quite a shock.
Good of Bush to not even want to wait til the last 3 states are called for him. If he claims victory before he's even given 270 electoral votes, it won't surprise me one bit. This country is a joke, I've lost all faith in it at this point. Mock away
So what ended up being the October Surprise?
So what ended up being the October Surprise?
Bosox win the World Series?
Bosox win the World Series?
That was a good one!
I think this is one of the saddest days of my life. Looks as if more Americans thought Bush a better choice. I just don't understand why.
Although, with what appears to be a Bush win, I envision even sadder days to come.
I just don't know if I can take four more years. It wears me out.
And now to start my plan for making money of the amount of hate this election will generate. Hey, it worked for Ann Colture, I fail to see why it won't work for me.
The Redskins tricked me.
At least they can't blame Nader this time.
On the other hand, since I gave up hope, I'm feeling much better.
You da man wendell - I'm having the T-shirt made today.
Yes, the "all Americans suck" thing isn't helping me right now. Many of us worked our asses off to try and get Kerry elected. Painting us with the same brush as Bush supporters just kicks us in the head that much harder. That said, we can also establish that all the people who voted for Bush are not ravening, moronic monsters. This "I hate you!" "No, I hate you more!" thing won't help the next four years be any better.
(/rant. Thanks, I feel better now.)
Aaaaaaaaand we're out! Good show people! Let's remember to return those props and wardrobe!
On the other hand, since I gave up hope, I'm feeling much better.
You da man wendell - I'm having the T-shirt made today.
I got that off a bumper sticker I saw years ago. Be careful, petebest, you don't want to get on the wrong side of the Copyright Gestapo now.
(almost half of) America weeps.
(almost half of) America weeps.
A glass little less than half-empty kind of person, I see.
Well, I didn't think the world would survive the first four Reagan years and wondered if Alziemers spared the world from his second term. I was too preoccupied with myself during Nixon's day to pay attention very much.
Either way - the spirit of America always has it's way of survival and expression.
Patience and faith.
I went to sleep around four a.m. PST. Didn't get up until now. I spent the day in bed with all media turned off, rereading Somerset Maugham novels. I popped up to argue with my roommate's partner about the sexism of certain fairy tales, then I called my mom to ask her about the details of her illegal abortion in 1961.
I know nothing, but my roommate's partner recounted a statistic she gleaned somewhere that only 17% of citizens 18-25 voted. Those are the people who will be drafted and require abortions. All I have to worry about is the health care I won't get for the illness I've always had.
Here's to redistributing electoral votes accordingly!
/obnoxious, seditious liberal
Tuesday in November
I heart Lisa Rein.
This map (yes, another one) caught my eye. I think it just points out how far back the cultural divide goes. Have we ever really been one whole country? It doesn't feel like it today.
That's pretty amazing. This divide has been there since the Civil War, and before?
I wonder how much of that is "real" and how much is "percieved"?
now that i think about it, that pretty much holds true for everything.
AmericanMonkeys sorry, I'm stupid-tired and my addled brainstem didn't compute in time that non-American monkeys would probably have fabulous insight into this question as well.yournaderchimpanzine?