July 26, 2004

• Let's be clear. MJ said "Go get 'em, tiger", as in, you know, her signature line, that she always says to him? [herewith, I spare you pointless links demonstrating such]. Not that Spiderman is that great an example of the emotionally frail, yeah? Ok, now that I've got that all cleared up, I'm going to go back and try to get through paragraph 2 of this no doubt lovely article on Wussy Boys: The Scourge of New York.
• ok, now that I'm looking at that in lavender & gray, I have to say that I don't normally get quite that amped up about Spiderman mythos. It's been a somewhat aggressive day, I think.
• "The emo archetype is actually a French man—ambiguously sexual, creative intellectual types, tortured poets, they might say, who are actually deeply misogynistic and harbor the most archaic notions of femininity or male-female interaction." w-w-what ?? I am shocked ! and hurt ! /sob, sob nobody to comfort me ?...
• more informed, less Spiderman-obsessed response: get stuffed yourself, you annoying women, and date someone else if you don't like him telling you he has a small penis before you had a chance to find out for yourself [note to men: uh, bad topic of conversation. Just a thought. Do not do this, because otherwise she doesn't have the chance to act like it doesn't matter] Metallica has always been emo-ish (introspective and woe-is-me) and Ulrich is whiny, everyone knows that. And now you're blaming this on the French too? Arrrgh and shove it, narrow little trend-observing Observer people. Sorry for throwing dirt all over your nice clean post, waraw. But thank you for giving me something inconsequential to rant about.
• A humble offering toward detailing the true essence of emo.
• Okay, I think she's not quite on the money in some ways - there's a difference between an "emo boy" (good or bad version) and a whiny, hipster white male. (Granted the former can be the latter, but they're not the same.) My commentary on Zach Braff's movie - yay for indie movies, but please - I don't need to hear again about how our generation's white men are broken inside, and their fathers don't love them and we could just never really understand them. Please, get over yourself. (And, looking at the movies, we're supposed to believe that youg white women can become self-actualized by getting the perfect handbag or man (same difference).) However, this excerpt rang SO TRUE: "It was very clear that he kept thinking he could secure a second date by deconstructing my behavior," she continued. "He may have thought it was clever and charming to think that my emotional boundaries are a crude front that I want him to tear down." What can I say but WORD. That has happened to me so many times. My resistence to your so-called "charm" has nothing to do my "issues" or "walls" that you need to break down. I'm just tired of your stupid shtick. (Sorry, had to get that off my chest.)
• "You know, you just can’t be late like this.... It really affects me, and I find it really upsetting." Wow, I said essentially the same thing not three weeks ago but wasn't actually embarrassed about it until just now.
• Apparently, I've been emo since way before it was cool. Unfortunately, the not-coolness has followed me since then and well, let's just say my social calendar is clear for a very long time.
• Bah. All types of women hook up with all types of men, and sometimes opposite sides of the bell curve hook up. The need to attach a name to it, and then rant about it being this big awful thing, is mostly just about making yourself feel like YOU are in the center of the curve, and the other person is at the extreme. There's nothing quite like the pathological need to feel like the "normal" one when confronted by someone you neither like nor understand. Or not. After all, who the heck am I? posted by EmoPhillips at 06:16PM UTC on July 26 (heh)
• You used to be able to be emo and not be repulsive to women, the key was in not actively trying to be emo, it only worked if you truely were emo. But it's all but impossible now, 99% of the poetry writing, tortured artist kids I meet actually have loving parents who give them money to buy pre-deconstructed clothing and anything else thier little hearts desire, and thier poetry sucks. The true emo kid is dying out.
• this is so funny. I personally find anything emo ANNOYING as fuck. However, I think that guys who are open about their feelings are, in essence, the next step in societal evolution. it makes absolute sense. I mean, if your attacker decides to stop attacking you, then your problems are over, aren't they? What I'm getting at is: Female discrimination in the workplace, sports, etc. won't end until the cause for it is gone (I.E male chauvanistic pigs), right? well, with this new breed of semi-femenine men, discrimination won't be an issue. As a matter of fact you'll probably get treated to a moccha-chino, as you talk abour your problems and braid each other's hair. This "love for all" scenario is not limited to just discrimination: They will be sweet to you in the bedroom, the streets, bars, clubs, and everything else. so what is the problem? you wanted tamer men, YOU GOT THEM. HA HA HA
• Yes but men can be tame without being annoying as all hell. Which the new breed of emo boy is. Perhaps ending the inequality between the sexes shouldn't be solved by just making men tamer, but by a combination of making women fiercer and making men more respectful (but not necc. tame) And honestly thats already starting to happen, at least among my generation.
• I'm personally looking forward to the big "Sex for Stoics" backlash! *stands emotionless like a (ahem) rock*
• MonkeyFilter: this new breed of semi-feminine men.
• For what it is worth: As for whether or not this is the “EMO” archetype, I really don’t care. The author had to come up with a name for emotional blackmailers who hold themselves innocent in the name of being “emotionally healthy“. A great character representation of what I consider this archetype to be is the mother -Ruth?- from Six Feet Under. Everything everyone is doing has to stop to take into account how she feels. She perceives this as being selfless and concerned for others when in actuality she is being self-centered and brutally controlling, while not taking any responsibility for her actions. When I meet personalities similar to this character’s I run far, far away. There is no other way to deal with someone so removed from personal responsibility. (It should be noted that I have a huge penis. Regardless of what you say about its size I will forever be convinced that I am in the 98 percentile of penis sizes.)
• I wholeheartedly agree with you, Testy Cod. Still I think it somewhat funny, because emotional blackmail imo used to be the domain of women. Perhaps we really approach equality? Women in violent organized crime are still few though. This is the next area that has to be worked on for true equality.
• As a woman with strong opinions about equal rights. I have to say the emo man is not what I look for. I don't care about sensitivity as much as I care about respect. Men and women are different, one not better than the other. I believe in equal pay for equal work. I believe in equal sharing of the responsibilty of home and family. I think if men and women could learn to respect one another and acknowledge that, the differences between the genders does not mean one gender is superior to the other, life would be a lot better for all. I find the macho, superior attitude of chauvanistic man intolerable. I find the whiney, emotionally needy emo-man intolerable. I find the female chauvanistic attitude just as intolerable. I find the emotionally needy, *I'm nothing without a man* attitude intolerable. There is a happy middle ground, I hope.
• Women in violent organized crime are still few though. *grins, grabs banjo, startings picking 'Bonnie and Clyde'*
• The assigning of characteristcs into a group, in this case, a group labelled "emo" is not healthy. Everyone is an individual. Everyone has many facets to their personality. Warrior, I think you underestimate the complexity of the world.
• This reads to me as just another example of the "nice guy". These people suffer from a syndrome which projects surface niceness and respect but conceals alot of anger and passive agressiveness, although the "emo-boy" seems to have a more narcissitic angle to it. I should know, I used to be that guy, and I messed up alot of relationships. Now that I've learned to be more assertive, I don't whine about someone being late, I just don't go out with them again, or I leave. If they don't like it, well, that's their problem, not mine. Of course, I don't get to act on this new attitude much since the engagement. ;)
• These are tough guys singing hard music about tearing down all the institutions and the establishment around you that pins you down. Huh? I thougth they were all about watching the movies Hetfield like, like Johnny Got His Gun, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly and The Ten Commandments. And read some HP Lovecraft too. And some thing or other about banging your head.
• s/like/likes/
• "Warrior, I think you underestimate the complexity of the world." No, nic, warriors don't underestimate anything. A bird is a bird, not an airplane. A horse is a horse, not a car. A man (or a woman), on the other hand, have the ability to grow mentally, and even become each other. This is what we're seeing here. 200 years from now, I can guarantee you that the whole "male is superior" thing will be gone, with perhaps women being the "dominant" gender. It's not farfetched at all. I can say this with confidence because I've seen it, and I exclude myself totally from this whole thing cuz I'm gay. None of these things apply to me. However, as a gay man, I have a better view into the issue than anyone who isn't. Because my experience has seen much of both sides.
• Everyone is an individual. I'm not.
• One can't exclude oneself from the human race, -- though of course most of us, at one time or another, think we'd like to when we contemplate the fiascos and blunders and biases of our fellows. (Deeds and decisions which of course we as rational beings would never, oh never, well hardly ever, hem-hem, perform/practice ourselves.) To me, before categorizing oneself in any other way, what matters is being a human being -- which identity in and of itself seems no more cause for praise or blame than being a fish or a cloud or a tree. Mary Renault, in her novel The Charioteer, makes the point: -- it's not what a person is or isn't, but what he or she does with it that gives worth and integrity to a life. Any life, whether gay or straight, male or female, this religion or that, this nationality or that, etc.
• "None of these things apply to me."-- warrior Ha! that's a good one. I don't think being gay excludes you from being in one of the two groups. Here's my prediction. 200 years from now, nothing will have changed on the topic of sex.
• Emo boy! Note the little round spectacles, the extra-chin-concealing but nevertheless elegantly trim beard. Oh no, that was "shove it".
• So apparently nicola is some sort of hive mind, or perhaps an intelligent computer simulation?
• A friend of mine maintains that she is a (very) small autonomous country. Perhaps nicola is as well?
• My appendix declared it's independence from me after a dangerous revolt years back.
• i count dots: so does that mean invading her space is an international incident? Do you observe the 12-inch restriction on borders?
• Oh-kay, first off, somebody wasn't paying attention at the movies. Hello, obvious melding of the hero's life with the personal life, the conflict between which made up the whole point of the movie like totally. omg. "You don’t know what it does to me emotionally," he continued. Admitting things bother him: Not Bad. Assuming he can read the other person's mind ("You don't know"): Bad. "It really affects me, and I find it really upsetting. Honest (assuming this isn't all BS), not manipulative. This is not bad. Next time, we’re just going to have to make sure you’re on time. It puts the lotion in the basket, precious. Manipulation. Bad. After that it's all a bunch of assumptions. Women do this. Men do that. They're all like this. They're all thinking that. Stereotyping. But if you sincerely believe that you have everything figured out, no amount of somebody telling you otherwise is going to change your mind. As someone who favors non-whiny-jerk introspection, I think the difference between a person who is in touch with their emotions and a manipulative whiner is the difference between a hero and a brute. You can use your powers for good (know thyself, treat others with respect and tact) or evil (manipulate others, be passive-aggressive). Maybe that Spider-Man reference wasn't so far off after all.
• You wanted men to open up to you and show more emotion? Ok, now shit up and suffer it!!! hahahahahahahaha. Meanwhile I'm sitting here scratching my hairy arse and burping to prepare myself for the counter reaction which will make blokes like me appealing again. I must remember not to shave.
• Girlie-men! </Ah-nold>
• Making the Emo-boy trend. Weak. Lay off the coke, and get out of nyc. That would be my advice. To recap an article written by 3 different people, (and without an editor apparently): Women meets guy online. Wank. On nerve.com: wank capital of sexy writing. And he is a wanker! If I were looking for a decent date I would not hit up folks who frequent a forum in which people (read that men) would submit their glorious exploits for others to jerk off too. (cough neil pollack cough). This is not a great dating pool. Proceeds to use scare quotes around "sincere" when describing emo music. That's funny. Then they argue that spiderman is an emo boy. Because he runs off and fights crime rather than giving dunst a good rogering and then some talk about other celeb emo types. That's the evidence. And then the smart talk. Start with quoting miss "MEET THE WHIMPSTER: THE MANIPULATIVE ASSHOLE IN SENSITIVE CLOTHING" author Rachel Elder, who defines the whimpster. I'll save you the time and summarize it in her own words: "Having sex with a wimpster is like cramming an emo record into a knapsack on the bus." I don't know what that means either, other than she hasn't actually ever seen an emo record, owned a knapsack, or been on a bus, cause sex isn't ever like those things. EVER. I have put records in a bag, and I’ve been on a bus. There is no way that could possibly describe, or symbolize any kind of sex that I am aware of. Good or bad. She's got some kind of crazy sex thing going, and I for one, can appreciate that. And finally the goods: Ms. Brown, who is actually Schuyler Brown, a "trend spotter for Euro RSCG MVBMS Partners, the ad agency that launched the original metrosexual study a few years ago" And Sharon Graubard, the creative director of ESP Trendlab, a trend-spotting firm. Here, hard at workhelping creat a new trend. Last year metrosexual. This year: emo!
• Next year: blogger!
• (/trendspotter)
• Speaking as someone who was both metro and emo long before either was cool, this chick has no clue. Any and all of the subjects she mentioned were faking the funk and hopping on the latest, "maybe this will get me laid" bandwagon. Are there sensitive, new age guys out there that listen to emo, dress well, are in touch with their feelings and not manipulative, passive-aggressive assholes? Sure there are. Will you find 'em on Nerve.com? Hells no. Trend spotters are always a month behind the curve anyway.
• I'm with surlyboi on this one. The whole article smelled of the whole "There aren't any nice guys" argument.
• Uh, surly: there's at least one.
• Speaking as someone who was both metro and emo long before either was cool... They were never cool.
• They were never cool. True, but the combination along with my other undeniable charms made it cool. =)
• driving me nuts: Surely you know that a gentleman never comments on the border restrictions of a lady. ;)
• "Sorry I'm late. I dropped my subway token and couldn't reach it. I had to use a lady's dog collar." "That's okay. I always bring a book. I was just reading." "That's a relief. I'm afraid I haven't made a very good first impression." "Excuse me, but I said I was reading."
• the combination along with my other undeniable charms made it cool So true... *wistful sigh*
• My daughter LOVES Emo, but my personal favorites are Oscar, Grover, and Ernie; and pretty much all of the Anything Muppets, especially Harvey Kneeslapper and Fat Blue.
• "It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man." -JH
• surlyboi - I think you must be kidding to claim to either metro or emo. I suspect you're just a nice human being with little pretence. (Sorry if that trashes your illusions of grandeur.) Maybe Siddhartha should have said "facades are meaningless."