April 14, 2004

MonkeyFilter: The Tagline I'm not sure why I did it, but I cataloged all of the taglines (that I found--94 of them) in comment threads here at MoFi. I laughed my bum off and I decided to share. Votes for a random tagline generator on the main page??

Here are the first few. If you guys want to see the whole list, I'd be happy to provide. MonkeyFilter: Democracy in Action MonkeyFilter: We only recognize sarcasm when it's actually pointed out to us. MonkeyFilter: More fun than a Barrel of Goatses Monkeyfilter: Running, jumping, climbing trees; putting make-up while we're up there. Monkeyfilter: taking on the task of greasing up a mefi regular or two. MonkeyFilter: Much better than a burning rectal itch. MonkeyFilter: Cheap, but not as cheap as your mother. Monkeyfilter: Bringing Albequerquians Together Since This Morning Around 9:30. MonkeyFilter: know what I'm sayin'? Monkeyfilter: Do it like a monkey. Monkeyfilter: youth, vitality and danger!! MonkeyFilter: Pudgy Gap-Clad Middle-aged Actor Figure w/ Perma-Sneer and Palpable Inferiority-Complex Grip MonkeyFilter: Having a good laugh at the expense of the gulliblepopulace. MonkeyFilter: Doesn't apply once we've caused someone's death.

  • I want to see the whole thing! I want a random tagline generator!
  • I, for one, would love to see the whole list.
  • I have to break these into chunks. MoFi doesn't like such a long post. Here's the second batch: Monkeyfilter: Tempting at work, addictive at home. MonkeyFilter: Why Won't Mathowie Return My Emails? MonkeyFilter: Let's just sit back and kick it, a'ight? MonkeyFilter: MY THEORY SAYS THAT IN THE BASIC WORLD TRUE SUCTION DOES EXIST. MonkeyFilter: True Suction MonkeyFilter: A Chair of Wisdom to empower Wise Men over the stupid intelligentsia. MonkeyFilter: You are educated stupid. MonkeyFilter: Is it possible for anyone to write this muchmaterial and not be wrong about something? (Babcock) MonkeyFilter: is bastardly queer and dooms future youth and natureto a hell. (Cube dude) MonkeyFilter: the same old gang of witch doctors, sorcerers,tellers of tales, the 'Priest-Entertainers' for the common people. Monkeyfilter: it's nicer over here. MonkeyFilter: A grim parody of the marriage ritual. MonkeyFilter: Shock, Action and Tits MonkeyFilter: matted hair, warts, and that fermented banana odor. MonkeyFilter: We Like Cock Punch MonkeyFilter: A non-speculative answer would be more informative. MonkeyFilter: a NON-Boyzone environment Monkeyfilter: we're sooooo two-thousand-three. MonkeyFilter: The mission is never end... Monkeyfilter: Your guide to Praetorship MonkeyFilter: sorry, we're in a bit of a funny mood today. Monkeyfilter: No one will shoot you while you're naked. MonkeyFilter: No naked shootings since December 17th 2003 MonkeyFilter: does one need a "cock" to fully understand this? MonkeyFilter: it's only dirty if they say the word "booty." Monkeyfilter: Anybody with an anus can do it. MonkeyFilter: seems to suggest a very particularly straight anal sex MonkeyFilter: MetaMethadone MonkeyFilter: astonishing, thoughtful and civil Monkeyfilter: All this scrolling made me tired.
  • MonkeyFilter: Another damn gay superhero Monkeyfilter: It's nicer over here, again and again... Monkeyfilter: #EEEEFF! MonkeyFilter: Check your pants at the door. Monkeyfilter: C'est un gentil petit singe tres curieux. MonkeyFilter: Apparent insane joy and odd capitalisation MonkeyFilter: Squeeze it between your manly thews. MonkeyFilter: OH GOD YES GIVE ME MORE STRAWBERRIES, OH YEAH! MonkeyFilter: A SURGE OF ALL NATURAL GOODNESS STRAIGHT INTO YOUR BLOODSTREAM! MonkeyFilter: Verbal Grooming since 11/03 Monkeyfilter: there is especially no meaning Monkeyfilter: You had me at hello (no, really, put your pants backon) MonkeyFilter: If you come as a penis, we will welcome you withopen arms. Monkeyfilter: Doin' the little car dance Monkeyfilter: subsequently subsequent subsequence MonkeyFilter: All your sexuality are belong to us. MonkeyFilter: "I felt afraid... the penises were enormous" Monkeyfilter: A lot more metafilter-y than you realize. Monkeyfilter: paranoid misogynist rhetoric and masturbatoryself-praising. MonkeyFilter: "I couldn't get on the unicycle." "Oh, fair enough then." Monkeyfilter: No takebacks! MonkeyFilter: The more people that are happy, the better Monkeyfilter: Access to more utter rubbish than you ever dreamed possible before. MonkeyFilter: The only place on the internet where "grooming" isn't illegal; in fact it's compulsory... Monkeyfilter: "My wink-wink calls me his Patchwork Princess and that makes me sooooo happy!" MonkeyFilter: a highly spiced banana
  • Last batch: Monkeyfilter: slightly more anal worms than you're etc, etc. MonkeyFilter: Not only your pets need gromming... MonkeyFilter: It's all [banana]. MonkeyFilter: completely raging full on dork MonkeyFilter: where every thread becomes a Buffy thread. :) MonkeyFilter: Up to two thousand times more absorbant than using your hand MonkeyFilter: Fooning Your Cola since 2003 Monkeyfilter: the horrid non-euclidean solid from beyond the stars MonkeyFilter: overall, ain't as grotesquely disturbin' as most of the news we've been getting this week. Monkeyfilter: pronounced "mag-no-me-ter" Monkeyfilter: Hold on to that feeling. MonkeyFilter: Tater Tots & Cock Punch MonkeyFilter: Your mad babbling intrigues me. Monkeyfilter: Where politics get a shrug and music gets a riot. Monkeyfilter: Hey jerky new guys--we don't do things like that around here. Monkeyfilter: a meta level of Monkey culture Monkeyfilter: so *that's* what that smell is. Monkeyfilter: Wine Fi*hic* Filter. Monkeyfilter: atkins compliant since 2003 Monkeyfilter: political news posts and bitching about Monkeyfilter: monkey poo Monkeyfilter: my precioussss. Monkeyfilter: Leting it Hapen Monkeyfilter: I'm happy here.
  • Monkeyfilter: Almost completely unlike being served up with an apple in your mouth or little paper booties on your feet.
  • Monkeyfilter: Less Snark, More poo flinging.
  • MonkeyFilter: Introspection never felt so good
  • Monkeyfilter: Hot Bonobo Action, 24/7
  • you forgot < href="http://monkeyfilter.com/link.php/1504#comment_16415">MonkeyFilleter: Get Your Bush Meat Here. Although I suppose that is more of a variation... ahh to hell with it. That list is hilarious.
  • ack! it worked in preview... oh, i must've deleted the a.
  • Thanks for filling in the ones I missed! I did a search for "MonkeyFilter:" and "MoFi:" which would explian why "MonkeyFilleter:" didn't get picked up. * snicker *
  • Go Kimberly, go. 94 bananas for you.
  • )))))))))) (((((((((( )))))))))) (((((((((( )))))))))) (((((((((( )))))))))) (((((((((( )))))))))) ((((
  • We could modify the MetaPhilter software to automatically pick out the taglines from posts (/Monkey[fF]ilter[^\.\!\?]+[\.\!\?]/)and compile them in a list. Then, the most recent ones could be automatically, randomly displayed in the top bar...
  • This is so great, Kimberly! Thanks for doing this.
  • May I suggest one addition in honor of the great American president? Monkeyfilter: A war against people who have no guilt in killing innocent people
  • MonkeyFilter: We Can't Hear You - There's A Banana In Our Ear
  • Nice optical illusion, Captain Psyko. THE BANANAS...THEY ARE GROWING. *adds more to to-do list*
  • Monkeyfilter: The bananas, they are growing.
  • This is great, Kimberly! But I have to wonder. I only undertake these kinds of projects when I am seriously procrastinating about something... wonder what you are putting off. Lessee, it's April 14...taxes, maybe? No criticism intended. This is fun!
  • MonkeyFilter: THE BANANAS...THEY ARE GROWING. Wait, is it legal to add taglines from a post talking about taglines?
  • Monkeyfilter: I laughed my bum off.
  • Ambrosia: Good guess! Wrong--but good. I had to do my taxes early this year to apply for financial aid for grad school. I was avoiding a project at work. :)
  • I vote for legal, allusion. My personal preference is that they come from actual thread conversation rather than just pulled out of someone's butt--and that was actual conversation.
  • Monkeyfilter: Pulled out of someone's butt MonkeyFilter: Actual conversation
  • MonkeyFilter: Sapping productivity from the moment you login
  • MonkeyFilter: Good guess! Wrong--but good.
  • Now the game is to match up the taglines with who origianl said them (or coined them, if they weren't culled from conversation). I recognise something I once said on the list (its nice to be a tagline). And I reckon this one must have been Dizzy talking: MonkeyFilter: A SURGE OF ALL NATURAL GOODNESS STRAIGHT INTO YOUR BLOODSTREAM! Although I could be wrong.
  • MonkeyFilter: I was avoiding a project at work. And how!
  • Oooh ooh! I know!! I know!! :)~
  • I was wrong: it was SideDish.
  • Kimberly, I'm sorry, I didn't see the second part of your post!
  • Heh. niccolo, I thought you were just elaborating so I didn't take it badly at all :)
  • I was surprised to find that something I had said was on the list - and that it was very silly.
  • Monkeyfilter: all our attacks are ad hominid (paraphrasing Wolof)
  • niccolo's automatic extensible random tagline idea is pretty cool.
  • Monkeyfilter: banana in our pocket AND happy to see you!
  • MonkeyFilter: My mighty thews.
  • MonkeyFilter: What is it about the interweb that brings out the weirdoes? [Courtesy your friends at BlueHorse]
  • I recognied two of mine: "Pudgy Gap-Clad Middle-Aged Actor Figure With Perma-Sneer And Palpable-Inferiority-Complex Grip" and "Why Won't MatHowie Return My E-mails?" <> We we all SO YOUNG THEN, SO, SO YOUNNNGGGG...
  • Monkeyfilter: All Your Banana Peel Are Belong To Us. {dedicated to Gramma BlueHorse}
  • Ahhh, That's my Little Sunshine! Alnedra, you make your GramMa so happy. Here's a Pop Tart just for you! Monkeyfilter: A round of bananas for everyone!
  • *rolls out barrel labeled "Peels Here"* Here ya go. Always glad to help, GramMa :)
  • MonkeyFilter: Chock full of BAD MOTHER FUCKERS. [responsibility of Darshon]
  • Can we have a multilingual one? I got a Chinese version of that one above: Monkeyfilter: Khan! Ni! Ngao! Boo! *Runs off before anyone figures out what it means*
  • It's not that "person who makes love to his mother badly" joke is it? I'd like to nominate every comment over here,especially this one.
  • Khan! Ni! Ngao! Boo! It sounds like Peekaboo!. It is related to it or I'm being extremely naive?
  • You're being extremely naive :) Khan=fuck Ni=you/your Ngao=old Boo=mother It's a very common way to swear at someone in Hokkien. *locks door, hides under bed*
  • Now I would be very grateful to have an audio file on that. Just to learn the correct pronunciation. I'm willing to exchance some banana peels for that.
  • I recognied two of mine: ... "Why Won't MatHowie Return My E-mails?" Uh, that was me. I challenge you to a duel, sirrah, to defend my honour.
  • Bloody hell, so many of those are mine. I really must stop doing that. I vote for MonkeyFilter: Shock, Action and Tits. Brilliant. Or pehaps MonkeyFilter: not so big on the taglines thing...
  • MonkeyFilter: In space, no one can hear you fling feces.
  • Okay, gotta go, these things are addictive... MonkeyFilter: YOU try and figure it out!
  • I'll lend you one of mine: MonkeyFilter: Tagline! You're It!
  • Blaise; I'm a plagiarist, not a fighter. If you hit me I'll cry like Cindy Brady at a sleep-over!
  • Question is - who is the originator? The person who first made the comment, or the person who made it into a tagline?
  • Monkey Filter - if it's not de-railing, it's poo-flinging!
  • MonkeyFilter: Loaded Angry Nuns on Bikes
  • MonkeyFilter: even taglines deserve a thread :) MonkeyFilter: more Meta than the MeTa
  • MonkeyFilter: 85% More Uptime Than Some "Other"Filters We Could Name
  • Oh, God, help me, help me... Monkeyfilter: Oh God, help me, help me I've read so many of these Monkeyfilter: I've read so many of these that every short sentence is starting to sound like a tagline Monkeyfilter: every sentence sounds like a tagline It's like a maddening echo in your head... Monkeyfilter: it's like a maddening echo in your head *a shot rings out and Plegmund slumps forward across his keyboard*
  • MonkeyFilter: A shot rings out... I couldn't resist!!!
  • Monkeyfilter: I couldn't resist.
  • Monkeyfilter: Waah, make it stop!
  • Are you talking about this thread, or this thread, tracicle?
  • My God, it's back! *reslumps*
  • Monkeyfilter: My God, it's back!
  • How did this happen? I wake up and it's like....the 'amnesia' never happened. Am I still dreaming?........
  • Monkeyfilter: am I still dreaming?
  • MonkeyFilter: Psychoactive Bananas
  • MonkeyFilter: *reslumps*