You are logged in as Anonymous.

410882 members

April 08, 2004

The Cult of Wendell. Grab your jogging suits and Nikes everyone! The Cult is Now Open for your dining and dancing pleasure!

sometimes I really like the low user count the Monkeys got goin' on. And since wendell was one of the first of the Blue Meanies to join us in Pepperland (okay before me even) I thought it was a good title to discuss the good thing / bad thing about a lack of bitching and slapfights.

it's a floor wax and a thread!

good thing = fun in the sun. happy monkeys.
bad thing = less back-and-forth. mostly forth.

I'm so sorry to see that. They need more monkey love. Or maybe just a less depressing color. I suggest lavender.

oh and also wendell seems like an ace guy. I mean languagehat says so. :)

huh. mefi's down so i can't even read the link. no wonder i'm spending a lot more time over here lately.

The system returned:

(104) Connection reset by peer

An error condition occurred while reading data from the network. Please retry your request.

So sad.

(Surveys <pre&gt tags, looks pleadingly at Monkeybashi)

Of course, if you were really in my Cult, you'd be constantly visiting and commenting at, the blog where I have chronicled my semi-professional writing as well as a few things I couldn't sell in the next hundred years. I promise to update today.

Of course, now MeFi's down (do not underestimate the power of the Wendell).

And thanks, petebest, for making my day (especially since this all started with one my depressingly self-effacing comments).
You'll get paid just as much as I gave quonsar when he FPP'd about my Opus article.

I definately plan on letting it go to my head.

*rubs paws together*
It's all falling into place . . .


sometimes I really like the low user count the Monkeys got goin' on.

Well, it all depends on how you define "low user count." Relative to MetaFilter, definitely, but keep in mind we just broke 900, and we should hit the big G any time now. 900 is a lot of people.

i'm just all about the low user number here. 67 as opposed to 14327. i feel like i'm in on the ground floor, as it were.

This post is meta(subj)->meta(filter)->meta(ask)->meta(talk)->meta(monkey)->meta(subj). At this level of recursion I believe this qualifies as walking in circles.

i'm certainly dizzy.

pizzasub I know Dizzy and you're not Dizzy!

okay I don't actually know him but someone was gonna say it

gillespie. i meant i'm dizzy gillespie.


Is this where we sign up to slap people? I've already signed up for the swap and I don't want to miss out on this either.

I don't know what this post is about, and I like it. Has Wendell started some kind of Join Me cult, or something? Is Space Kitty and her rather special bits behind all this?


oh and to pmdboi's point, I'm thinking of low user count just by the atmosphere - 1000 or 5000 may seem the same to me, but if/when we hit the point where it's not as much fun as it is now (and there's a correlation to the number of users) it'll "officially" be a high-user count. So says me.

on preview; dng no Cult of Wendell is complete without a healthy dose of SpaceKitty bits. Dot com.

Is this the place to go to start my own cult?

you can start a sub-cult of Wendell. The Pizzasub Cult of Wendell Cult. Of course Wendell would get 17% of the gross, plus retain film and TV rights throughout the universe in perpetuity.

17%? that's a bargain.

So, where's the Koolaid?

It's not a cult if you don't got kool aid.

If it's banana flavored, I'm in.

Wow. This thread is so righteously obscure, even I can't derail it.
Rock on.

Oh, come on Dizzy. Surely nothing is beyond your magic powers of derailment and mockery.

you can try! bring it on.

If it's cockpunch flavoured, I'm ++in!

Seriously, if we wanted more snarkery there'd have to be a brutal arena set up MeTa style, ideally with royalty sitting in balconies to give the thumbs-up or thumbs-down. There's simply not enough spilled blood around here.


Mm, I hate you.


Nah, doesn't work. Yez are all too nice. Fuck.

I'm thinking of starting a cult called Mr. Jason Akehurst, 11 Summerhouse Road, Stoke Newington, London. Who wants to join me? All you have to do is mail a fish, or equivalent, to Mr. Jason Akehurst, 11 Summerhouse Road, Stoke Newington, London, and you will be admitted into the cult. Join now and recieve this beautiful carriage clock.

Geez, now I'm gonna have to go to Costco to get enough Kool-Aid.

I'm going to change my name at Orkut to Stoke Newington.
extreme inside joke

I hate you all.

No I don't. Dammit.

Stoke Newington - to the extreme!

I'd just like to point out that I don't actually know who lives at 11 Summerhouse Road - I thought about moving there 6 months ago, but didn't, and now regret it - but it's unlikely that it's somebody called Jason Akehurst, and you probably shouldn't send them fish. That is all. Nice house, though.

Flashboy - I'm sorry you didn't say that last earlier. The fish is on its way, and I used your email and url info in case they wanted to say "thank you." Too bad I couldn't afford overnight delivery.

I'm confused too, but I still want kool-aid.

Oh, and just wait until some smartass comes up with a "monkeyfilter contribution index" page. You think everything's all lovey-dovey and happy - wait until its quantified, dammit! Then you'll be singing a different tune!

* exits, cackling *

Sorry, wendell. I've been forced to withdraw from your cult by popular demand. But I wish you the best of luck.


Two monkeys enter. One monkey leaves!
/pumpin' up the contri-dex

No one leaves the cult of wendell, languagehat. You signed on for life. Just look at the small print if you don't believe me.

What is this kool-aid I keep hearing about? Sounds like a bandage.

Anyway, call me back when you guys get around to designing the funny hats for the cult meetings.

i'm looking for a site that incorporates some kind of simian in its name, where links can be posted, but that doesn't have any references to "filters"


Oh boy! Funny hats and Kool-ade* at the Thunderdome!
Can I come?

*actually, it's -ade, not -aid or -aide. Just remember: there's no band-aid for when you drink Jones-flavored Kool-ade.

/GramMa knows

this Kool-aid, it vibrates?


I <heart> MoFi

MoFi ♥'s pete_best.

*also refuses to take pants off for money*

I was reading the start of that train wreck last night and thinking to myself: "self, you ain't missing a thing". I do respect crunchland so muchmore now though. It's not easy standing your ground in that arena.

Uh, excuse me. Did I give pete_bester permission to inject this topic into MY cult thread?

And, just for the record, I pay somebody else to take off my pants. I really should buy a larger size.


*bangs forehead nine times against the floor while scuttling backwards*

Ohm, Ohm All Deranged
Where the Beer and the Cantaloupe Pay...

Alnedra and PF, you're the first two I'm buying black Nikes for...

oh and I guess my interpretive dance goes unnoticed??

*scowls at Alnedra & PF, eats 14 ice cream sandwiches*

You're not just jerking my chain, are ya, Wendell?

pete_betterthanyou, your black Nikes are in the mail. (Actually, I ran out of Nikes, you get KMart Thom McAnns which I have blackened with a magic marker)

And Rule #3 of the Cult of Wendell says: "The Not-Too-High-But-Slightly-Over-Average-Height Glorious Supreme Leader shall always reserve for himself the absolute right to jerk the chain of any of his followers, as well as to chain the jerk, pull the leg, hoist the petard, hit the funnybone with a baseball bat, pass the buck, buck the pass and leave twisting in the wind anyone with the low self-esteem required to join his cult."
Copyright 2004 The Cult of Wendell
Anyone who reproduces, republishes or repeats will be ruthlessly Scientologized.

Thank God pizzasub no longer is active on this site. Just scrolling through these comments made me hungry even though I just got up from the dinner table.

What possesses you to resurrect these obscure threads, nock?

Demons, mostly. But sometimes rabid owls.

In this case? Demonic rabid owl.

Is it wendellmas already? I have totally not finished my shopping yet!

« Older Courtney Love In the Slate | Squirrel Stuffing For Beginners. Newer »

To post comments to a thread you must login or create a profile.