April 07, 2004

• A couple reasons. Public outcry at their removal, and the miniscule profit they make seem to be what I remember from debating this in high school as the top reasons that they're not gone.
• Another pet peeve of mine: bank notes. When you take them out of the machine and put them in your pocket, you fold them in half. When you put them in your wallet, you fold your wallet in half, then put them in your pocket. The only time a banknote isn't folded in half is when you're handing them over to someone. Why aren't they half the size?
• I used to throw them in a jar and when it was full, take them down to one of those Coinstar machines at the Albertson's and exchange them for shiny quarters. That's the only use I know. well, that and throwing handfuls on the table when you tip, in the knowledge that some waitress would gladly kill you for doing that. And you can't use them in parking metres either, although you can use 5cNZ coins in lieu of dimes. But since NZ is fast becoming a cashless society (much faster than the US), prices haven't been nicely rounded -- you still get charged $5.99 for a six-dollar product, because you're probably paying by eftpos (or debit card). The store will just round down to 95c if you are one of the few who pays cash.
• There are penny slots in Vegas. Oh, and those machines that compress them into designs. I seem to recall a discussion about how marketing droids would go insane because they would no longer be able to advertise the low, low price of $19.99 and would have to either go to $20.00 or $19.95. Plus sales tax apparently would be more problematic.
• They make pennies so that every year I can turn all my leftover pennies collected from everyday life into a sandwich after spending an amount of time worth more than said pennies rolling them and taking them to the bank. Also, the faint Abe Lincoln statue in the monument is too cool to be rid of. Or, what tracicle said.
• Ah, the penny stretchers! Why did I forget THAT priceless use!?
• there's a U.S. congressman who's been griping about pennies for years now but his ideas never seem to go anywhere.
• Why does anybody bother with the money rolls anymore? Every bank I go to will count it on the spot anyways. Just put it in a bucket and have 'em dump it into the big machine.
• I used to be able to snap a penny between my fingers and send it hurtling at someone. I think they are pretty useless anymore. Some people don't.
• With a sales tax here in Los Angeles of 8.25% added onto the posted price of everything, it's nearly impossible to pay cash for anything without either giving or receiving pennies. For me, it's just nice to see Abraham Lincoln with a healthy tan.
• You can use them to pay bus fare in Portland. I knew a girl in high school whose family saved all its pennies for many years and they were able to pay for a small vacation when they cashed in all the jars. I don't envy them the rolling they had to do, though.
• re: sales tax Well, merchants would just have to round to the nearest nickel. The truth is, we already do this ("take a penny, leave a penny"). Banks and institutions routinely deal with fractions of a cent in their transactions, but we haven't had half-penny coins for a very long time, and we (consumers and merchants combined) are not any poorer for it. I actually had a debate going with a friend about this--I said pennies are literally not good for anything (you can't buy anything with them), and if we hadn't been driving across the country at the time I would've won that arguement. (There's a novelty scale in Wall Drug, South Dakota that takes pennies.)
• The vending machines that sell stamps at the post office take pennies. I can't imagine showing up with 740 of them to buy a book of 20 stamps, but it works fine if you just want one, and have exact change. Also, I think that the subway turnstiles here in San Francisco take pennies, if you are desperate.
• Fractional cents can add up. Back in the '70s,there were news stories about about a bank programmer who diverted fractional cents to an account he had set up. Sadly, I don't remember how much he wound up with, but it was impressive to me at the the time. Snopes calls it a legend, but doesn't really debunk it. I've lost my html cheatsheet, but you can find their take on it at http://www.snopes.com/business/bank/salami.asp
• Office Space Path. OFFICE SPACE.
• path- there's an html cheatsheet on the MonkeyFilter FAQ page.
• Pennies are dangerous and disgusting. Everyone must know the ass penny trick by now. Pennies spread disease. All currency does. If it's come into contact with another person it must be cleansed with fire. Fire I say! Actually, I'm a big fan of the penny. What else can you play penny poker with?
• I'm pretty sure I've seen parking meters here in the midwest that still take pennies.
• I second the Office Space hint and hereby announce my deep and sordid adoration of the main character.
• An, Jeeze, now I feel so out of it. OFFICE SPACE???? How does that relate to pennies or stealing fractional cents? You young whippersnappers have a language of your own. When I was your age, I had to go to the Beatniks to get language not understandable by the older generation. Luckily, it was downhill both ways.
• Path, I'll let you in on the secret. Office Space is a film that among other things is about three guys who get together and figure out how to steal from their company by doing something with the fractional cents. Or something. But the best part is when they beat the shit out of the printer.
• I, too, am not a pussy!
• Hey path if you can't relate to Office Space (which you should really see btw) maybe you'll remember Gus Gorman.
• Wiggum: What do you got, the whole town's DNA on file? DNA guy: Y'uh huh. If you've ever handled a penny, the government's got your DNA. Why do you think they keep 'em in circulation? -- Little-known facts, Who Shot Mr. Burns? Part Two
• Pennies spread disease. Pez: WELL! In my day we didn't have all that disgusting perversion and filthy behavior. The worst that happened was some dweeb put pennies up his nose. I guess we now all know where THAT leads. The civilized kiddies used to suck on shiny pennies. Ummm, coppery goodness. *sigh* Today's children will never know those innocent pleasures.
• I hesitate to ask, but Pez: "the ass penny trick"?
• You give my ass pennies to your little daughter to buy gumballs with.
• i'm with path...you folks lose me sometimes. i've never seen this office space either, but that gus gorman looks familiar.....what show was he on? forks....you just had to ask, didn't you!
• Sure they will BlueHorse. It's their parents who'll be having conniption fits. Thirty years from now, rebellious teens will be swallowing pennies by the handful, just to show their independence from mom and pop, thus increasing circulation. Sewer workers will be buried under mountains of corroded coins. Soon after, the pennies will be outlawed, and a new blackmarket will spring into being.
• Congress considers minting pennies in steel, as it now costs $1.26 to *make* a penny. Even Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson acknowledged in a radio interview earlier this year that getting rid of the penny made sense but wasn't politically doable -- and certainly nothing he is planning to tackle during the Bush team's final months in office. ...to think that anyone would dare touch such a hot political button during an election year!
• That "$1.26" is really 1.26 cents. But why not make them out of plastic for a tenth of that? They would still not be worth counterfeiting.
• Good catch, ThinksTwice.
• I tried to *make* a Penny for years. It finally ended in a bitter sexual harassment suit that I would rather not speak of here.