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July 24, 2008

Something in saliva helps heal wounds faster. And it took this long to figure this out. Because "licking his wounds" isn't a common phrase or anything. So nobody looked into it until now. Righty-O.

I prefer to liquor my wounds.

the old bourbon bandage, huh TUM? I know it well ;)

the tequila tourniquet?
help me out here...

Scotch Suture, Chartreuse Cast, Vodka Enem... ah, no, wait.

Right...that should always be Champagne, not vodka.

I live my life by old wives' tales. They knew a thing or two. But casting ne'er a clout can get a bit smelly in the modern office, so I have to work from home.

So that's why my doctor prefers to spit into my cuts instead of cleaning it out and giving me a tetanus shot!

If he also licks them, I hope he's not charging you, Gramma.

George Carlin: Saliva is dangerous to your health, but only if swallowed in small quantities.


I guess this is why blood tastes so good.

My HMO is Healthy Martini Olives.

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