May 21, 2008
Demented Buick Boffer - the man who shags sedans, rogers runabouts. He fucks cars, people! The Cortina Casanova.
Never gets turned down.
You gotta admit, that car in the picture is pretty cute.
He says that his most intense sexual experience was "making love" to the helicopter from 1980s TV hit Airwolf.
Well, yeah.
*pages rocket88*
For all you curious monkeys (and I know there are some mighty curious monkeys out there), here's how it's done.
Shamelessly stolen from Skrik
Holy shit, kinnakeet.
"Washing a car, is very much like making love to a beautiful woman. You've got to caress the bodywork. Breathe softly and gently. And give every inch of it your loving attention. And make sure you've got a nice wet sponge."
/Swiss Toni
Cars are very sexy.
But a Volkswagen Beetle?!? That's just sick.
autoerotica
That red pickup doesn't into the whole Furry thing...
LMFAO! Oh, apologies, a serious subject. Well, they do come with their own rubbers. No unfortunate little accidents to be concerned about there.
He was taking a risk with the chopper from Airwolf though. "O mi glof! I've lost a ball bearing!"
I made out with my Civic once, but I don't think it was very comfortable for either of us. Ah... College.
...
Just think, MCT, without the Internet--and MoFi--we might never have known of such things.
*resolves to spend more time outdoors*
That picture with the Eclipse will haunt my nightmares. And the blocked license plate just adds to the creepyness.
Said a sad little man from Nantucket,
As he soaped up his car with a bucket,
"It's so shiny and clean,
And it rides like a dream,
You can drive it and then you can fuck it".
*applauds*
It's true that her tranny is shot,
But she's got what a woman has not,
Just one word of warning,
While lustfully horning,
The tail pipe's exhaustively hot!
Don't get me started
i'm not going to get into this in too much detail but this is old news. Google "Dekhyr Dragon"... I know about him because he used to contribute to my mid-90's zine (the last-millennium, dead-tree version of a blog) called The Polished Knob.
aahh... kinnakeet beat me too it. grr.
Of course, if you're gonna do it, you'd better have the proper music.
> Don't get me started
Don't, ThinksTwice, it's alright.
...I will never look at those foam can holders the same way again.
Why oh why does 'Paradise by the dashboard light' started playing in my mind? 'Do you love me...' *groan*
I was thinking of this song.
Sir Richard Pumpaporche.
Rule 34?
Holy crap - this cannot be real??!! And directions? There's directions on how to fuck a CAR?? Even explaining which position is best to get the car to rock the most? Geez, I thought the stuffed animal thing was weird.....
There's directions on how to fuck a CAR??
Well, it's not like it's instinctual.
Ah, my bad.
*snicker*
no, it's automatic
Sir Richard Pumpaporche.
I thought it was Sir Percy Pornoporsche.
Geez, I thought the stuffed animal thing was weird.....
Said like someone who's never googled 'dolphin sex'.
In the photograph, he's standing next to the Love Bug.
My vote is on Hoax.
Don't, ThinksTwice, it's alright.
posted by roryk
Roryk wins everything.
They may call me demented and sick
But my new love is shiny and slick
Her upholstery scent
Sends me heavenward-bent...
Let's just say I'm now driving stick.
YAY!
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