February 20, 2004

Peggy Noonan's Latest Masterpiece I'm am not a left-winger that gets all worked up by Peggy Noonan. The reason is I find her hysterical. I don't think that's the intention of her op-eds, but good entertainment is hard to find.

Mr. Bush is the triumph of the seemingly average American man. He's normal. He thinks in a sort of common-sense way. He speaks the language of business and sports and politics. You know him. He's not exotic. But if there's a fire on the block, he'll run out and help. He'll help direct the rig to the right house and count the kids coming out and say, "Where's Sally?" He's responsible. He's not an intellectual. Intellectuals start all the trouble in the world. And then when the fire comes they say, "I warned Joe about that furnace." And, "Does Joe have children?" And "I saw a fire once. It spreads like syrup. No, it spreads like explosive syrup. No, it's formidable and yet fleeting." When the fire comes they talk. Bush ain't that guy. Republicans love the guy who ain't that guy. Americans love the guy who ain't that guy. "explosive syrup." Oh my God! Peggy discovered a new weapon of mass destruction. That's why we didn't find any WMDs in Iraq. Saddam Hussein was using explosive syrup. "A prostitute lived in the complex. Barbara Bush just thought she was popular." That's funny as hell. I also wouldn't be surprised if Nooner made it up. The whole thing about the Bush family coming from modest means isn't worth going into. The family is old money. "How did he treat me? I'd like to say he was cool because that would suggest he's been reading my columns and they've had a huge impact. In fact he was friendly as ever. There are several ways to interpret this. I choose to believe he is hiding his pain." Bush doesn't read newspapers. Peggy actually thinks Bush reads her column because he made eye contact with her. "He wound it all up, took no questions, and left with the flurry." He won't answer questions to conservative columnists. She was blown away by a man that blew her off. Must be the explovise syrup she had for breakfast. Peggy Noonan is better than "The Onion."

posted by Sullivan 20 years ago
  • I love her unabashed distaste for intellectuals (in your quoted paragraph -- I don't hate myself enough to subject myself to the entire article). Intellectuals say, "I warned Joe about that furnace"? What? Intellectuals start all the trouble in the world
  • rafter: You beat me to it. (Although I probably would have used "dis" in there somewhere ;) I just do not understand why being an intellectual is a bad thing--especially when we're discussing leading the most powerful country in the world. I don't understand why anyone would want Joe Shmoe to lead the country.
  • "I saw a fire once. It spreads like syrup. No, it spreads like explosive syrup. No, it's formidable and yet fleeting." I wonder if the WSJ editors were rolling on the floor when they read that. That's so fucking funny. Has anyone notice, with the exception of people like David Brooks and George Will, conservative pundits and bloggers do not talk about policy in factual detail. When was the last time one of them actually quoted a passage of a bill. I do it all the time.
  • "What may turn out to be the Republicans' secret weapon, or the secret ingredient of their success? I think that, as always, it comes down to issues." More likely if Bush ends up with a secret weapon it will an october suprise.
  • "What may turn out to be the Republicans' secret weapon, or the secret ingredient of their success? I think that, as always, it comes down to issues." When I read that I pictured Karl Rove, with an apron on, busting out the seven herbs and spices.
  • More likely if Bush ends up with a secret weapon it will an october suprise. Or sooner.
  • Shocked! Yes shocked I am at the insinuation that the Grand Old Party would sink to the sort of trickery, dishonesty, and downright manipulation of the American people. Shame on your intellectuallities! Poo holes!
  • Yeah, yeah, but I gotta at least point out: "How did he treat me? I'd like to say he was cool because that would suggest he's been reading my columns and they've had a huge impact. In fact he was friendly as ever. There are several ways to interpret this. I choose to believe he is hiding his pain." Noonan is clearly being tongue-in-cheek here. She doesn't think he's been reading her columns. Also, I don't think she said Bush comes from modest means; she did say that he didn't enjoy the extreme extravagance of wealth during his childhood, such as limo rides to school, as his father did. There are lots of things we can criticize people for; frequently I find that more of it is made up than needs to be. ;)
  • I read this link and the comments and then went and bought the local paper (Christchurch Press - a fairly widespread paper) -- imagine my horror to find the same "article" on the opinion page. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
  • There's only one way to deal with this "Down with Smartness" thing: Get contacts.
  • Point taken, ulotrichous. I still remember Reagan calling the Khmer Rouge freedom fighters. Pol Pot makes Saddam Hussein look like someone's silly uncle. Kill the smartest people in the country. That's a great way to build a nation. What a nightmare.
  • Never saw this -- before my time at MoFi -- but sweet Christ what a fat steaming load of shit. Makes me ashamed to share a childhood hometown with this woman. We should be collecting crap "thought" from years past, like this, and sending it to those who authored it to remind them to think harder next time.