November 11, 2005

5-year old Tyler Petrucci Sings : And it will freak you the fuck out.
  • Just take your average, spoiled five year old through a toy store and don't buy them anything and you get pretty much the same result. I much prefer these guys
  • Extreme tantrum equalized; heard at any *Mart near you. Disturbing nevertheless!
  • I just want to pummel this rotten little shit.
  • are you guys kidding me? "Too young to die, too young to live. You will die forever!" from a 5 year old this song is the BOMB!!!
  • Ok somewhere in there Damien snuck in!
  • Well that's just fucked up.
  • So what is one left to do if it is determined that one is both too young to be alive and too young to die? When will he become old enough to live? When will he become old enough to die? Would it be some cruel joke of the cosmos if he becomes old enough to die before he becomes old enough to live?
  • Thank god someone's finally managed to capture the essence of post-toddler rage at a world that won't understand them. I mean, little Tyler must be utterly pissed that I didn't understand a single word of his song about not being understood. Or whatever the hell it was about. That's the kind of thing that can haunt a 5 year old heavy metal rock star, that is. On the whole, a little less disturbing than when these two sing. But only a little.
  • So what is one left to do if it is determined that one is both too young to be alive and too young to die? Doesn't matter dude, cause the sun's gonna blow up and you're gonna be a zombie.
  • At first glance I thought Tyler Petrucci might have been related to John Petrucci. Something's telling me not.
  • Well, it feels less contrived than the hasidic reggae from yesterday... for what that's worth.
  • That Eyeball Skeleton band that Alex Ander posted is the kind of crap that only a mother can love. I can draw better than any of those kids. My cows don't have antennae or external ovaries. Christ, sometimes you just gotta tell a kid, "Look you suck, give up already. Hear this? This is what good sounds like. But you don't get it, you'll never get it. Prepare for a life of mediocrity." Then make them flinch. Kids always flinch. Stupids. Tyler rocks tho.
  • Ugh. Just . . . just Ugh.
  • It sounds a lot like the zombie death-metal band The Dead Will Rise who are fronted by a petite female lead singer (screamer?). Here's a good example of the sound. It's actually pretty awesome to see them perform, though some of my friends described it as "unholy PMS". I really liked it though.
  • Puts on boxing gloves for bout with his arch-nemesis The Giant Squid Boo. This has Pro-Tools written all over it. With the ridiculous over the top effects on his voice it's impossible to tell if the kid is just mimicking the sounds of his daddy's music (and occasionally making a sound conjugation that "makes sense") or if he actually has a clue what he is doing. Pro-Tools LE is the Casio Keyboard of contemporary wankers.
  • I prefer Smoosh.
  • The The Dead Will Rise link didn't work for me. Page not found.
  • Apparently they weren't too into to rising.
  • Well, it's early.
  • With the ridiculous over the top effects on his voice... You don't need Pro Tools to add a filter to vocals. If you can tell me that you think they used Pro Tools to modulate and correct his pitch I'll start laughing. I think the important thing to realize here is that this kid can "sing" death metal. Death metal is not skilled in much more than shouting and screaming. Pitch isn't really that important. Wow, a kid can shout and scream, I can't believe it! Seriously, the only thing that I find shocking is the words he chose, and it's not like they're even his. With an older brother that listens to death metal to the point of being in a death metal band, imitation of death metal lyrics will ensue: he's five years old.
  • I think you guys are just trying to cover up for the fact that you were FREAKED THE FUCK OUT!!! As advertised!
  • The Dead Will Rise link works for me. That's why I posted it, see...
  • InsolentChimp: I totally don't understand the gist of your post. Are you for or against? YOU MUST TAKE A STAND, YES/NO! it still was musicially uninteresting. it was interesting, however, for other reasons
  • YES/NO! Um, what exactly are we talking about?
  • I have no clue. Cheers!
  • I'll drink to that!
  • I'm taking a stand, da**it! It's a nice little ebonywood 3-shelved plant stand--I'm going to put it in the hallway next to the coat rack. There's a pine telephone stand and a pressed wood TV stand left, if anybody's interested....
  • I've never taken any stands, but I did once take a locker. From a locker-blowout-sale at the local locker wharehouse. I was drunk, it was 3am, it wasn't properly locked up, and my friend and I had to carry the 100 pound 4 door locker all the way to his parents house. They were not amused.